by misspeaches 26 Replies latest members private
Somebody's fishing...I'd be careful as to what you say and how you say it.
Is there some push at the halls lately about contacting inactive ones? I got a couple of calls last week from people wanting to get together "at the meeting" and then lunch or a picnic afterwards. Hmmmm.
Just say it isnt you and put it to the back of your mind.
G'day peaches!
FWIW I don't see any reason to be any different to what you've always been. Talk about the things that you always enjoyed as friends. It does seem though that they have an agenda so if they ask about going to meetings and so on, just say you haven't been for a while. Don't give a reason - you don't have to now - you're in a guilt-free zone now!
Cheers from Mrs Ozzie and I
I must say that Ozzie has the best advice I've seen. Why MAKE yourself tell them? That makes it sound as if being JWs was the ONLY reason you were friends. Is it?
Well I had a really long think about what course of action to take... After deliberated consideration on the matter I decided that considering they are still in contact with people from my last congregation that if I was too hide from them that I don't go to meetings chances are that they would find out eventually anyway. I mean they were my friends, esp the mum/wife, and I would hate for them to think that I was being decietful.
So I gave her a call. She was so excited and asking me to come stay. I told her that a lot changes in a couple of years and asked if she had heard anything about me from the local JW's. She said she hadn't so I told her that I hadn't been to a meeting in about 2 years. Her response So you missed a few meetings big deal... Which is so typical from D. I said yeah like a few hundred! We went into a conversation about why I stopped going (because being a JW made me feel like crappola and I was depressed etc etc) and how I am now (happier than I've ever been) and she told me how pleased she was for me. Then she said well my invitation still stands. I don't care if you go to meetings or not. I invited [Miss Peaches] not a JW. You haven't changed and I don't want something like this to stand in the way of our friendship! Well you can imagine how astonished I was by her reaction. Anyway she told me that she wants me to think about coming interstate to come see them. I then told her that I want her to consider her invitation as well. Give it some thought. Then she had to go to get the kids ready for the meeting.
A couple of minutes after the phone call I got another text message
I'm sure, P (husband) sure, we're all sure - we'd love to see you, so, just give us your ETA! Paul said you've always been a good kid!
and then another one
I'm so excited!!!! But I shall be patient. Luv ya heaps.
So in my opinion it was an extremely positive outcome... I mean you couldn't expect responses like that... And this family are not your seat warmers they are active and gung ho JW's. I feel so stoked that they say they just want to keep the friendship alive. But at the back of my mind I can't help but think that because they still do love me and they are trapped in the borg that they wouldn't be able to help themselves in trying to 'upbuild' me. And I definately don't want to hear any JW upbuilding....
conundrum.... conundrum....
They may already know that often times being a sincere human is more powerful than being a gung-ho witness. Sometimes a silent witness is the strongest of all.
If you decide to visit, and they do decide to 'encourage' you, you can always politely say 'please, I'm really not up to that today.'
I think you need to just stay in the moment and not worry to much one way or another with them. Avoid the witnessy talk and just concentrate on the friendship stuff. It's possible that they may decide that you are a spiritual danger to you, but it's also highly likely that they love you for who you are and realize that shunning is unconscienable. Go and enjoy.
I'm glad it's worked out nicely so far.
-Aude.
(((((Aude))))
Thank you says it the best for me....
