Is it best to ignore it?

happehanna

My parents and family are refusing to come to my daughters wedding as she is marrying a DA man.

She has never been a baptised witness and has been with him for seven years. They would probably all attend is she married a stranger she just met!

I want to rise above it all and continue to show them love. Would anything be gained in trying to persuade them. His parents who are also JW will attend. They said they would love to come but cannot as obedience is better than a sacrifice which means nothing to my daughter of course.

jeanniebeanz

I doubt you could change their mind at this point. I'd ignore their Un-Christain, intollerant, rude, hurtfull, blind, ignorant, cruel, mean, braindead behavior, and show your daughter a great time without them.

Still hurts though, I know. Sorry about that. Don't let them put you on some kind of a guilt trip though, you are not the one acting in such an outrageous manner.

J

happehanna

Thank you jeannie you are right and we will have a good time without them.

How glad I am that my daughter is not involved with people who are so misled, but family is family.

The situation is confused where his parents are coming but her grandparents aren't proves what a strange lot they are.

I shall not however find it easy to show them the photos which I know they will want to see!

Crumpet

happehana
the biggest gift you can give is to extend your arms open widde to this future son in law. I know that I was overwhelmed by the love I received from my last boyfriends mum and my current boyfriends mum. They dont pry (tho sometimes I wish they would!) and they enact motherhood in a way I never imagined was possible.

Have a great wedding and make up for the lack of love from the JWs. Their absence does them no favours.

crumpet

kls

I will be in a situation soon where my son will be getting married and my husband / his father will not attend because the wedding will be held in a church. At first i was upset then asked the board here on there thoughts and they all said, have a good time and it is his lose not mine. This is true with you and your daughter . thou it does hurt that loved ones are so brainwashed they can't see through it for their own family, you and others like me will cherish our family and enjoy their happiness, with or with out them.

Ignore for it is their lose.

Happy wedding

happehanna

Thank you crumpet for your kind words.

Not easy as there is a lot of history with his parents and myself as I used to be in their congregation and my daughters future father in law was the presiding overseer. very confusing I know, both families are lovely but have funny views as to what they will and will not do.

Thing is the abscence of my daughters family will be hard to ignore but we will do our best.

Sassy

yeah.. changing their minds is probably impossible.. they are brainwashed..

if I get married, I know my mom wont' attend. and I am not offically da'd or df'd.. but she feels I should be if I were going to meetings..

happehanna

You are right KLS it is their loss and I know they are upset that they will not be attending as in their hearts I know they want to.

happehanna

You are right Sassy they are brainwashed, just like I was, and I can understand the torment for them wanting to do the right thing but getting it totally wrong.

My parents refuse to meet my boyfriend and I am in the same situation faded, a non attender, weak and hence refuse to acknowledge my new life.

Dragonlady76

Ouch!

So sorry to hear that the family has decided to take such a stance. Unfortunately the JW brainwashing is pretty effective so I doubt they will change their minds. I hope your daughter can deal with this and have a beautiful wedding. Best wishes to you and your daughter.

Dragonlady76

Is it best to ignore it?

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