some unimportant random thoughts & reflections

by DanTheMan 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • DanTheMan
    DanTheMan

    To be honest, I feel like I barely qualify as an ex-dub. Wasn't raised in it, no relatives in it, and aside from my first one or two years of being involved with it, I didn't believe much of it. But at the point where I first started having doubts creep in, instead of investigating those doubts, I turned off my brain. Because I needed the structure and community so badly. I'm sure the endless "don't question" propaganda coming out of Brooklyn was a contributing factor also. I regret so much those years of mental atrophy. I stopped caring about things, I lost my natural intellectual curiosity, I just wanted Armageddon to come and obliterate everything. Well, Armageddon never came, just like it never came for ol' Charlie Russell.

    I needed JWism. I probably would have taken my own life or gone completely crazy had I not found something like JWism to latch onto. But it was only a mask, it didn't really address what ailed me. And I don't know that what ails me is curable, I am not the most together guy, not by a long shot. I think that people find me to be odd, hostile, immature, paranoid, hyper, and they are probably right. I'm seeing a great counselor though, so it's two steps forward, one back, two forward, one back. I think that I could be a good guy. I hope the potential is there for me to be a nuanced, mature adult. I hope this mad mad world gives me a few years of life to atone for my wasted years.

    I think that I've sought an identity in the ex-jw community, which makes my involvement with this board somewhat pathological. It's the same old sh*t basically. Just like how I was so anxious to be a "hood" back in high school (the ciggy & pot smoking, heavy metal crowd were known as hoods, short for hoodlum I guess). I idealized the hoods, I thought that they were clearly superior to any other clique that existed. I wanted so bad to be one of the central figures in the hood crowd. It never happened. Then after some unsavory experiences it began to dawn on me that the hoods were more screwed up than anybody. Not too many years later I would make the same mistake with JW's. And here I am on this board, up to almost 1800 posts, wanting so much to be one of the Stinkypantz or LittleToes or AlanF's of this board, yet I know that I could quit posting tomorrow and very few would notice I was gone.

    So, while this probably isn't goodbye, I think I need scale back the amount of time I spend here waayyy back, and unless I make some sort of announcement to that effect like the one I'm making now, I'll find myself spending hours here that I could be spending on more beneficial things like watching South Park.

    BYE!

  • Brummie
    Brummie

    Gee Dan, didnt know you were feeling like this. FWIW I have always thought you were a very valuble & intelligent poster on this board. The fact that you are an individual here is to be more prized than being one in a "clique" and just like the others. You fit in great here in a group but you also fit in just as well as an individual.

    Its good to hear you are seeing a good counsellor, hopefully they will help you to realise that you are a valuble person, whether individually or in a group.

    I think its a good idea to find other things to do and broaden your horizens.

    Take care, and up the postings rather than dropping them

    Brumie

  • Xena
    Xena

    I have always enjoyed your posts also Dan. You give a unique persepective dispite the fact that you refuse to own a cat .

    I'm glad to hear that you are moving forward but hope that you will continue to be a part of our rather large disfunctional family.

  • myself
    myself

    Dan, your thoughts and reflections were very important. Why would you want to be recognized as the status of another poster. Dan you must appreciate yourself, other things will then fall into place.

    You don't think you would be missed????...ok so I haven't told you that you got me totally addicted to Super Collapse, hey I made it to over 7 million points

    Seriously, I hope you will stay around. I took some time off because I had to help set up a business and to get some things accomplished. I would check in and read for a few minutes here. No the board didn't cease because I wasn't here. I didn't catch any topics asking about me...but you know.... it didn't matter. I am here for me and because there are others here that I care about. I can also say that I didn't take the time to check on the whereabouts of other posters, hmmm maybe that will be my next project.

  • talesin
    talesin

    Dan

    You make a valuable contribution to the board, IMHO. Why compare yourself to others? Don't leave.

    Xena

    dispite the fact that you refuse to own a cat .

    Shocking! What shall we do with him? Dan, could you PLEASE reconsider this - how CAN you be kitty-negative?!!!

    t

  • StinkyPantz
    StinkyPantz

    DTM-

    I appreciate you. . that's all that really matters, right?

    Okay, maybe not. . . but shoot, we all feel like you do sometimes. Underacheived (is that a word), under-appreciated. . . But I gotta tell ya something. . .I recall your name being mentioned each time one of those "who's your favorite poster" popularity contest threads are started. I realize that your words weren't just referring to JWD only, but hey, you ARE appreciated around here, and you better not go anywhere or I'll give you a spankin'. I am sick of good people leaving!

    I think that people find me to be odd, hostile, immature, paranoid, hyper, and they are probably right.

    The above quote is SO me!!! Ya know, we'd probably be best buddies!! I do agree that something is wrong with you though for the following comment:

    And here I am on this board. . . . wanting so much to be one of the Stinkypantz or LittleToes or AlanF's of this board

    Do you realize that you are totally insulting Lil Toe and AlanF two very sexy. . I mean intelligent guys, by even putting me in the same sentence as them? I am not worthy. Why would you wanna be an argumentative, faithless black woman? Hehehe. . but I will admit I am flattered. . . and I am pretty sure I love you.

    Editted to add: hey if you have IM, will you add me? [email protected] and StinkyPantz12345 on yahoo and aol

  • onacruse
    onacruse

    Dan, your posts are always thought-provoking, as was the conversation we had a couple months ago...I gained perspectives from you that even today (re: a recent thread) are proving relevant and valuable.

    Your analogy to "the hoods" is another example of that: From where do we derive true self-worth? By being a high-profile member of some "hood" (whatever that group might be)? By being a misfit and rebel? By being a non-participant in society? (Rhetorical questions, because you obviously already know the answer. )

    In the ebb and flow of this db, it seems like pretty much everybody has spurts of activity, and periods of quiessence. I hope you keep poking around here and jump in now and then.

    If you like, perhaps we can talk again soon? I'd certainly enjoy that.

    Craig

  • Robdar
    Robdar

    Dan,

    You are not the only one who feels the way that you do. We all have our moments of doubt and we have all been hurt from the tyranny of the WT org. That is why we are here. That is why we need you here.

    It doesn't matter how long you were a JW; 2 years, 20 years. Because of our experiences, you and I and all of us have decided to fight against what we know to be false. Your's is one of the many voices that gives us unity and strength to keep fighting for the truth. Your voice gives this forum power.

    If you must leave, don't stay gone too long. Your responses will be missed. I was going to say that your "comments will be missed" but "comments" felt like too much of a JW thing to say.

    Take care,

    Robyn

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe
    And here I am on this board, up to almost 1800 posts, wanting so much to be one of the Stinkypantz or LittleToes or AlanF's of this board, yet I know that I could quit posting tomorrow and very few would notice I was gone.

    Gawd, low aspirations, or what!!!
    You need a confidence injection, my friend.
    Besides, I don't know how I managed to get into a mixed bag with SP and Alan - that's one "menage au trois" that bears no lengthy consideration

    FWIW I always read your posts and enjoy them immensely.
    Unfortunately I couldn't get to Joy's for the Fest that you attended, but from what I hear you're a lovely guy. I heard that from folks that I trust the opinion of, btw. Volleyball would have been on the agenda, methinks.

    Now get out there and post another 1800 - you're nearly catching me up!!!

  • refiners fire
    refiners fire

    Dan. Personally I think you are one of the boards GREAT posters. I always read your stuff as soon as I see you post. Your personal analysis and picking apart of yourself, well, frankly, they remind me of me when I was younger. You have nothing to fear, you have already made it.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit