Sex Education and JW's

doodle-v

I read in a magazine recently, (I'll see if I can find the source later) which was discussing abstinance with regards to sexual education. Anyway the point the article was making was that the majority of young people are going to become sexually active during their teen years and that with that being the case why not educate them on keeping it safe. This article made me think about being brought up JW because as many of us know, many dub parents (including mine) taught and still their childen abstinance, but more like "dont have sex because you will get disfellowshiped" which to us young horny teenagers translated to "dont have sex and get caught or you will get disfellowshiped, but if you do get caught, cry and act like you are very sorry and maybe you will only get reproved."

What I wish would have been the case and I know it is a loooong shot, but I wish dubs would just realize that their is a strong possibilty that their teens are going to experiment with sex anyway. In my opinion only teaching abstinance in the case where a kid ends up having sex can in some cases cause the teen to make poor choices, ie. birth control and condoms. In my opinion how are you supposed to know about safe sex if it was never taught to you and all you were told was "sex is bad!! dont do it!! Every single one of the girls my age in my former cong ended up having sex before they were married (including myself). Several of them ended up pregnant. This of course is not to say that had we been educated about different forms of birth control none of that would have happened. However, I can't help but think that some different choices would have been made had some of us been a bit more knowledgeable about what is available out there.

What do you all think about this?

-Doodle-V

Undaunted Danny

I go way, way back in JW land.Although JW young'ns are constantly counseled to suppress their 'raging' hormones and seek celibacy.Most often Girls married at 16 boys at 18...

My Dad would warn us that Nathan Knorr sez;"masturbators will be 'cut off' at Armageddon"

The reality is it was always a cruel dog eat dog dating scene.. http://www.dannyhaszard.com/dating.htm It truly is a hardship to be a JW teen.

myauntfanny

Abstinence is a big thing these days in lots of religions, it just makes me laugh and laugh. Some lady on another board was saying that the kids in her neighborhood say "purity is cool". Well, they would SAY that, wouldn't they, when she's around? I'm a firm believer in sex education, I believe that studies generally show that only sex education actually brings down the teenage pregnancy rates. But JWs? Never. They live in a state of perpetual denial and if they started sex education they'd have to admit the kids are having sex no matter what they say. Their whole little fantasyland would crumble.

doodle-v

Their whole little fantasyland would crumble.

Too true, and as if the borg really understands what young kids go through. Its crazy how as dubs we would take sexual advice from some old crusty men in Brooklyn.

xLaurax

Well being a teenager myself i feel as though i can comment on this topic. I have parents that believe sex should not happen until you are truly commited to somebody. Although i believe that 'ideally' this principle is true it is not the reality. For these reasons my parents have been very strict when it has come down toboys. Only now on turning 16 am i 'officially' allowed to have a boyfriend. I have to say that ultimately this had promted me to do things behind their backs.

I also believe that sex education is a good thing in the fact that it warns you of the problems sex can cause.It also helps you in deciding things such as birth control etc. This means that sex is likely to be safer but not necessarily 'reduced'. But all in all i would say that it is a good idea or at least a good laugh in school

xLaurax

franklin J

hey doodle

I agree with you.

I have a daughter who is turning 13. My wife and I are well aware that she will mature sexually with or without our "parenting". What is of serious concern to me is the AIDS issues that are part of the sexual climate. Although unwanted pregnancy is still a threat; I am less concerned about that then I am about the deadly consequences of AIDS. We will moniter her relationships and she is fully educated about birth control ( we have already had this discussion with her).

My son is only 10 and has not reached that level of development yet. When he does; we will educate him also about what to expect and how to take precautions.

Sexuality is not something we encourage with our children; it is going to happen whether we, as parents, like it or not.

As parents, I think it is realistic to say that we can only control them for a limited time. Education is the best defense.

Clinton

The problem with the JW's is if a young person uses some form of birth control then it shows premeditation to have sex and thus there is a stronger chance that you will be seen as unrepentant. They would rather see you have unprotected sex "accidentally in the heat of the moment? and be so sorry after then for you to use protection. Typical warped thinking on their part.

As far as the sneaking around behind parents backs goes I think this is what many JW teens do though I think that most teens, no matter what religion, hide things from their parents. With the JW's though I think it causes a problem when teenagers feel they need to live double lives because of all pressure not to do wrong and the high price that is paid when you do. It trains you to be devious and underhanded which can cause problems later in life if you don't break that habit in other relationships.

Clinton

Nosferatu

I was yanked out of sex ed classes when I was in school. What really taught me the need to have birth control was the number of single mothers in my high school.

I'm really against any kid being pulled out of sex ed classes, including JWs. It seems as soon as a young JW couple gets married, the woman gets pregnant. My choice was to wait a couple of years after I get married to have kids, just so I could enjoy time alone with my new wife.

My guess is a lot of JW kids don't learn from the examples of the single mothers in high school, because they're "no part of the world". They don't really think about it.

Also, that "Your Youth" book isn't any help.

Mulan

This made me remember something that happened back in the 60's when I was in high school. One of my friends was having sex, and feeling guilty about it and said she was going to insert a tampon and tell her boyfriend she was having her period. I asked her why she didn't just use something since they were going to do it again anyway. She said "Oh no. I'm a Catholic and we don't believe in birth control". I about fell off my chair.

On another note, one of my daughters in law is one of four girls in her family. The three eldest are married and were all virgins when they got married. The youngest (22) is still a virgin. They are lovely young women, and they are not and never were JW's. Some women just save it and think it's important to do so. I know this is unusual, and they are all pretty, talented gals too.

Something my husband always says now (now that ours are all raised and married) "why expect our children to be different than we were. A healthy sex drive is a desirable thing and nothing to feel guilty about, or feel the need to confess. I just hope kids are careful".

doodle-v

I have a daughter who is turning 13. My wife and I are well aware that she will mature sexually with or without our "parenting". What is of serious concern to me is the AIDS issues that are part of the sexual climate. Although unwanted pregnancy is still a threat; I am less concerned about that then I am about the deadly consequences of AIDS. We will moniter her relationships and she is fully educated about birth control ( we have already had this discussion with her).
My son is only 10 and has not reached that level of development yet. When he does; we will educate him also about what to expect and how to take precautions.

Franklin, thats great. I have a 12 year old stepson and a 7 year old daughter and we plan to educate both of them as well.

The problem with the JW's is if a young person uses some form of birth control then it shows premeditation to have sex and thus there is a stronger chance that you will be seen as unrepentant. They would rather see you have unprotected sex "accidentally in the heat of the moment? and be so sorry after then for you to use protection. Typical warped thinking on their part.

Thats too true and very sad. JW's arent the only religon that is like that unfortunately

-Doodle-V

Sex Education and JW's

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