To WHO WILL LISTEN:
Until yesterday, I did not even know that this discussion group or anything like it existed. I really did not care. But after years of being sexually abused, physically abused, and reaching out to tell the truth but then only getting cover ups, and now the betrayal with the UN thing. I have had enough. MY Family has been HEAVILY involved with JW since the beginning, on both sides all of the way back. I Was a Regular Pioneer and MS. MY family is still very "high up" at Bethel, in the very top of the service dept. for almost 30 years, and all of them are still actively involved.
I was sexually asaulted by members of the congregation when I was a 5-9 years old young child, and they had their young daugther "participate" as well. Pictures were taken.It was brought to the attention of the Elders, and was covered up. However, alot of people knew about it. They are still around. My father was very abusive as well, and I desperately reached out for help, some did help me, but not the Elders, (one did, who became my friend,) but all along I was told to "keep quiet, and let Jehovah work things out". Being in the "stature" that we were, we had to have things kept hush-hush about what was going on.
I grew up, bitter and became very angry, I married a great girl, and tried to tell her and her parents what had happened, her dad was an elder as well. We had over 700 Brothers and Sisters at our wedding, as we were very well known. It was too much for them to deal with, and and I felt like I was losing my mind. We seperated after a year. I do not blame her. I was a mess from everything.
Some people there I deeply care about, and I know that they truly love God in their hearts. I was only taught JW teachings, all my life. I did not know anything else. This UN thing, is real hypocrisy. I have alot to tell, and I am sure now someone will see this at Bethel and will figure out who this is and contact me, to get this calmed down. Too late!! Why did you not care before, when I went through all of the years of abuse and torture? I continously begged for help, but you closed your hearts to protect the "image". Lot's of people witnessed it, and everyone turned a blind eye. Do I need to mention names? Where you there when I almost took my life, because this is how "Jehovah" was? Yes, you can try to say that it was wrong and that the Elders in three different congregations were wrong, but what about my family members at Bethel who knew as well? Why should innocent children be abused and then have their voices silenced, just to keep it quiet? Yes, say it was all a horrible, horrible mistake, again and that the Society does not operate this way. What about it though? What about the damage done to me, as a child and young man? Does it take it away? The Horrible, horrible mistakes that were made? Again, a little child is supposed to "Wait on Jehovah" to get justice for being raped, abused and tormented? I am not bitter anymore, and all I want to do is continue to heal. Isolated case? I doubt it. You would think that having family in Bethel and the lineage I had would have protected me, and made sure that the people were brought to justice. But no, only more cover up. No police, no outside help as this was "worldly", and no telling anyone else - as a couple of scriptures should help heal me.
Many of you love God, and the truth, to the depth of your being. This is not an attack on you. This is not an attack on JW. Just hoping that everything I went through can be spared of some other children. I HAVE SEEN AND EXPERIENCED THE DECEPTIONS FIRST HAND, AND I KNEW NOTHING ELSE-IT WAS MY WHOLE LIFE. I HAVE HAD TO LIVE WITH IT, and it almost killed me. I am better, and have gotten a good life, I have been blessed, and have found some peace. But how can I stay silent when this is still going on? IT must stop. God does not intend for anyone to be abused, raped, or suppressed. I left the org over 7 years ago, and never looked back, I just wanted to heal find out the truth and set myself free of all of the pain. It was real tough. Looking back found out that I was ill-equipped to live in the world because I was programmed that the "end of this system of things" was coming any day, I should be out in service, and I was not allowed to go to college, play sports ect., you all know the drill. Finish High school and become a pioneer. Jehovah would provide. Now I am told it is okay for people today to go to college, take additional job skills, play sports in school, ect???????? What about me, and my life? Horrible, horrible mistake again? Told that it was wrong to even associate with UN, politicians, ect. as they were disgusting, "satanic", and "demonized people gainst Jehovah's Kingdom" and "worldly" and would all die at "Armaggedon". We were not to even associate with them, remember everyone? And now, the Society has secretly been affiliated for over a decade? Why is there a double standard? What About me, and my life - Horrible, horrible mistake, right? How mant times does it take to destroy people's lives? I will not allow this to happen without speaking out anymore.
