Possibility - I have seen in my years growing up in this cult, several examples of "extreme behavior" taken by a JW to get out. I am not saying this is what occurred here, but perhaps she was miserable, wanted out of a marriage and the cult, and staged this. It would certainly be a better outcome than the obvious alternate. And, it is not unheard of. I remember a very elaborate ruse pulled by a young "sister," back in the day. She disappeared, leaving no note behind or informing anyone. She just up and left, leaving behind all her personal effects. About a month later, she was discovered, living in another part of the state, with a new boyfriend. Safe and sound, and much happier outside her marriage and outside the org. It is a possibility, albeit a very remote one. Either way, I wish the best for her and hope she is found, alive and untouched.
pmljohn
JoinedPosts by pmljohn
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Great Performance by Mumford & Sons on SNL This Past Weekend.
by Low-Key Lysmith ini am generally annoyed by m&s, but damn, this song has me re-thinking it.. "below my feet":.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eiabgo-pde.
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pmljohn
Indeed!!
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What was the biggest lie that you have ever told any JWs while you were still a JW?
by Iamallcool ini was deleted as ms some years ago, a brother thought i became an elder.
at the circuit assembly, he asked me if i am elder now, i said yes so the brother told me all of the gritty details about his wife and her sister that got disfellowshipped at the same time.
they went out with the worldly guys and they both got pregnant.
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pmljohn
Biggest lie? Pretending to be the perfect PO"s kid for 20+ years. I was freakin' Keizer Solze!
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I'm going to see 2016 Tomorrow Morning!
by Farkel inyep.
together with my liberal friend!
i couldn't believe that movie is playing in no less than ten theatres in cowtown where i live.. i just ordered my copy of "the amateur" and it was only $4.95.
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pmljohn
So, are you trading religious falsehoods for political ones now? After all, a lot of this movie have been de-bunked. The Right does like to have others think for them, parcel out their own versions of truth and reality. A lot like what the JW's do. Surprised someone could see the BS of a religion, but not of a political party. Then again, there are just as many issues with the other side, so it's not like you really have a great choice, other than abstinence.
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New York - Washington - Oregon - Anyone?
by pmljohn init has been a few years since i last reached out, so here i go again.
i was pretty much raised jw, from a very early age.
my dad was always an elder, usually the main one.
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pmljohn
3rdgen - To answer your questions, they went both ways. When my sister first decided to "move on," they called their friends at Bethel, to see what they could and could not do. Imagine, raising your child from infancy to adulthood, and then asking relative strangers in another part of the US, for help on whether to talk to your kid or not. WTF? My parents, especially my day, have always treated those in NYC, traveling overseers and Gilead members the same way that normal people might treat a movie or music star of their choice. A definite glorification of the position, more than the person. We had Bethelites at our home every weekend when we lived in NY. We hosted the CO visits, repeatedly. We ate at Bethel, more than we ate at regular restaurants. The push for my sister and I to go onward and upward in the "org" was strong. So, it really was not much a surprise that my parents reached out to these same people for help on how to deal with their children.
The advice was to limit association. That worked, for a short while. The main issue was that my sister went on to be a successful writer and lawyer, making a high income. She went to two universities, earned several degrees. And my parents, like many JW's, choose to pioneer, and move around the country to where "the need was greater." They had/have nothing, and they need the financial assistance my sister can now, with education and focused hard work, can provide. So, like so many religious folk, when they need something, they will compromise their values. So, we interact with our parents. My sister provides assistance they need. Myself and my family, we are available to assist them with rides, mechanical support, meals from time to time, etc. We all get along, but we all know there is a "disappointment" that permeates their interactions with us. They need us, but deep down, they still beleive that if they could just cut us off, we would come around. The logic of that message, perpetuated by the JW Org, is beyond ridiculous. There is no critical thinking or individual thinking done by either my mom or dad. They accept any and everything the Org tells them. My dad still reaches out to the NY Crew, not so much for advice, but for the star-f'ing aspect. He loves that group, for what they are. And I can say, that many of the ones I interacted with as a child and young adult, made me see the hypocrisy, clear and defined. But, that is another story.They are disappointed in our course we have choosen. I have tried to discuss my choices, but it is like arguing with a wall. They won't change their minds, and I have to respect that. I only have asked that they do the same for me. My dad cannot help making comments from time to time. My mom invites me to the memorial every year. I have started telling them that I will attend the memorial, if they come to Thanksgiving dinner. Just a dinner, but on Thanksgiving. So far, we are at an impasse. It is sad, but everyone has the choice to make for themselves, and I have to respect the choice, as ignorant as it may seem to me, that my parents have choosen.
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New York - Washington - Oregon - Anyone?
by pmljohn init has been a few years since i last reached out, so here i go again.
i was pretty much raised jw, from a very early age.
my dad was always an elder, usually the main one.
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pmljohn
Magi - It would be kind of interesting to get together with a few ex's. I did not spend a lot of time in Beaverton, living the lie, so I may not know many or any of those out there. A lot of my family is still in, including here in the Beaverton area. But for those that might be lurking, that lived in or around Peconic NY or Tacoma WA, and perhaps knew my folks, I would love to hear from you. My memories from my childhood are spotty, almost like I lived through some kind of trauma, and blocked chunks out. Go figure. My uncle was a CO for my whole life. My dad was the PO forever. Our family was always going to unassigned territories, working at The Farm or Brooklyn, and doing hall builds around the area. Needless to say, I had a lot of interaction with many people, and cannot remember much of any of it. Hence the desire to possible hook up with some, who, like me, came to their senses and started thinking for themselves, and acting like real, decent human beings.
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New York - Washington - Oregon - Anyone?
by pmljohn init has been a few years since i last reached out, so here i go again.
i was pretty much raised jw, from a very early age.
my dad was always an elder, usually the main one.
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pmljohn
It has been a few years since I last reached out, so here I go again. I was pretty much raised JW, from a very early age. My dad was always an elder, usually the main one. My mom, was/is the atypical JW wife and mother. We moved all over the country, all in the name of "going where the need is greater." My sister and I both exercised critical thinking, mainly the "thinking" part, and joined the rest of society, in "the world." Needless to say, we are both happy, sane, disease and drug free, responsible, hard working, thinking human beings. All the things we were warned about, that would happen if we dared question or worse, leave, never happened. It really is like "opposite day."
However, I do wonder if any of the "friends" I grew up with, are on here. I was leading a double life from as early as I can remember. Which meant, that those "friends" I had, usually were doing the same thing. Some are still in. I hear the stories from my parents. But I have to think some came to their senses, like I did. That some, had brains. Otherwise, why was I hanging out with them, doing all the sh$$ I did, with them? I would love to hear from them. So, if you lived in or around Cutchogue NY, Tacoma WA, or Beaverton OR, I would love to hear from you. Perhaps we knew each other. Perhaps we were even friends. And maybe, just maybe, we can share some awesome stories about the awesomeness of our upbringings.
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For those of you who inactive, but not officially DFd/DAd, how do you manage?
by undercover ini read with interest the thread about how people who are mentally out yet still attend (some) meetings manage to do continue to do it and it got me wondering, how do those of us who are completely inactive, no longer practicing members of the faith, manage to pull off our new ex-jw life, yet never invite scrutiny or investigation from former friends, elders, etc.. take me, for example.
i've been out several years now, but have never officially renounced my faith.
i've never out and out called it a crock of shit to anyone who could make real trouble for me.
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pmljohn
After my first marriage began to fall apart, I stopped going on a regular basis. My family did not live local, so it was easy to avoid any of the unpleasant conversations that would surely have occurred if they did live close by. Eventually, after my divorce, I was honest about not going or participating in any JW activities. Of course I still got the push from the parents to go to the Memorial, which made no sense and sounded very hypocritical to me. Needless to say, I didn't, and I don't.
I did get visits, not from my elders, but from a different bunch. Some remembered me, or people I knew, so there was an effort to get me back. I would get a regular visit from a few elders, and we would have great conversations about why I choose to leave and why they felt I should come back. But when I started asking real questions, challenging doctrine, changes, the GB and the WTBTS, guess what?? The visits ceased. In fact, the younger elder got a bit pissy when I questioned them. I knew they would stop when they could not answer any of my questions in a satisfactory manner. What was satisfactory to me you ask? Prove anything that they believe, without using the bible or their literature. And for those of you who took time and really studied and learned about life, the world, nature and history, know that they really can't prove a thing.
So, I am happily married again. I have two well behaved, obedient children. The things I did by the time I was 14 and before, leading the double life of an elder's son, is no example that I would ever present to my kids. They are innocent and hopeful. They do not think everyone is wicked and will lead them to fornicate or do drugs. And guess what? Those things don't happen like I was taught they would. People on the outside are much more honest, wholesome and they behave, not because they are required to, but because that is who they want to be and what they want to do. I do not miss anything from that cult. I do dislike that all those "friends" I had over the years, many of them disappeared, wanting nothing to do with me. We shared the same interests, of music, food, fun, etc. But eliminate the cult out of the equation, and suddenly, I am shunned. F' em!! I am happy and completely honest, after so many years of conflict, wickedness and dishonesty. -
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Did you ever do something for this religion that now makes you shudder ?
by man in black inback in the early 80's right after i was married the main driving point i kept hearing at the meetings was "do more,,, pioneer ".. well being the young impressionable jw couple that we were, .
my wife is a speech therapist, so working pt was no problem, but i ended up working construction, cleaning carpets, and shoveling snow at all hours with the brothers, and i worked like a d*** fool at all hours.. funny how there was so much support for me to work with the witnesses, but once the decision was made work could be very iffy at times.. and the main thing that just causes me to cringe now is how so many of the witnesses in charge of the congregation thought that we did not need insurance, my wife had a policy with her school district, but my son and i did not.
granted medical expenses were not as bad then, but just the idea of thinking that we did not need it that god would watch over us just embarasses me to no end now.
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pmljohn
I feel bad, sometimes, for not standing up to my parents and telling them that I had no interest, nor any belief in what I was doing. I went through the motions for 20+ years, and at the same time leading a horrendous double life. I was way worse than anyone I encountered or associate with now. Stealing, drinking, fornicating, masturbating, the whole works. Of course if I knew what I did then, that I do now, I would have known that a lot of what I was doing was just stupid, and no "Worldly Person" would do half of what I did. But, the forbidden fruit was described in such horrible, graphic, exciting terms. As a JW, all worldly people did horrible, sexual, violent, insane things. And since my PO dad forbid even the common sense things, like PG movies and Knight Rider, I rebelled like a crazy, insane person. And I paid the price, over and over. But if I had just stepped up, faced my dad and said "I don't believe in this shit and I want out," perhaps I would have become the better person that I turned into, way too late in life. I burned a lot of bridges and ticked a lot of people off with my behavior, behavior I was raised to believe was "normal" for the world.
Now, I know how wrong that information was and still is. My parents still are as gung-ho as they were when I was young, but they know full well where I stand now. And surprisingly, they accept me and enjoy my company. I know they still would love to have me back in. They still think they know that I will not be in paradise. But I feel I have a much closer, more respected relationship with them now. And, I don't feel guilty about a thing. That guilt over leading a double life and hiding my "real" self from my parents was tiresome and created emotional and physical issues over time.
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Depressed witness going door to door
by I quit! inthis morning i saw a witness mother and her son heading out into service.
from the area they were in i think they were going to be doing some street corner work.
i was stopped at a light when they walked in front of my car.
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pmljohn
I remember my mother and father putting us on the streets, in front of the casino's of Las Vegas to hand out literature. Pre-teen children, on the strip, after dark, handing out literature. And this was back in the day when there was a slew of people handing out pornographic literature as well. Needless to say, we were extremely embarrassed and I know I for one would have rather had the other literature to look at than what I was schilling to folks walking by. I can't even imagine how any responsible parent would let their child work door to door or on the street in this world. Too many kids go missing. Too many weirdos and chi-mo's. The most ineffective way of getting your message out, is door to door. Way to keep up with the times JW's.