i swear my mother used to keep better track of my bladder than i did.
she'd sit me down occasionally for talks such as "i noticed you've been going to the bathroom a lot during the meetings lately maybe we need to cut down on what you drink on meeting nights" etc.
others would go 2 or 3 times a meeting and if i went twice a week i'd get a talk about it!
Sorry, somehow sent by mistake. I meant to say:
I'm stunned by what I'm hearing.
On one of the other boards I saw an excellent spoof Watchtower cover with the image of a big white toilet roll, and the cover line was something like How should I wipe my ass?
I thought, okay funny, but now I'm hearing that people have been told from the platform when and how often to pee? I am astounded.
i swear my mother used to keep better track of my bladder than i did.
she'd sit me down occasionally for talks such as "i noticed you've been going to the bathroom a lot during the meetings lately maybe we need to cut down on what you drink on meeting nights" etc.
others would go 2 or 3 times a meeting and if i went twice a week i'd get a talk about it!
I'm stunn
i swear my mother used to keep better track of my bladder than i did.
she'd sit me down occasionally for talks such as "i noticed you've been going to the bathroom a lot during the meetings lately maybe we need to cut down on what you drink on meeting nights" etc.
others would go 2 or 3 times a meeting and if i went twice a week i'd get a talk about it!
I'm stunn
ive never really been one to say a whole lot against the organisation, even though i was really unhappy in the years leading up to getting out of it, i still think theres so many good, peace loving and genuine people in it.
that said i was brought up as a witness and sometimes feel like ive been robbed of a true childhood.. my dad was a lot older than my mum, and was almost 50 when i was born.
he was the po in the cong and being a witness was, and still is, everything to him.
A lot of resonance here. Thanks, guys.
At what age is a kid capable of saying 'my parents are JWs, not me'? I really wish I'd known as a child what I know now, and that I'd had the courage to take a stand.
I don't think children can be expected to do that though, because it's so difficult to draw the line between the good 'parent things' that a parent does and the evil controlling JW things.
So I guess we just have to forgive our younger selves. And get on with the living now.
But what to do when you see children close to you going through the same thing? My sister has adorable little twins, and she's an exceptionally good mother, but it breaks my heart to think about what they have ahead of them. How old do they have to be before I try and let them know that they do have other options? Is it ethical to even do that behind their parents' backs?
from my post at jwo:
this is my real weekly report, aged 18 to about 26 years old.
meetings: officially 5 hours .
From my post at JWO:
This is my real weekly report, aged 18 to about 26 years old.
Meetings : officially 5 hours
Getting ready for meetings, including showering, putting on subtle Christian make-up so as to look sisterly and not scare the brothers, or taking off trousers and putting on dress or skirt, packing book bag, finding Watchtower or NWT or Paradise book or Kingdom Ministry School bruchure thingy, and field service notes for report @ 45 minutes per average meeting (usually more): 2.25 hours
Traveling to and from meetings and parking @ 20 minutes each way: 2 hours
Socialising and finding seats before (@10 minutes) and socialising, encouraging new ones and making FS arrangement after (@ 20 minutes): 1.5 hours
Preparing for meetings and talks @ 30 minutes per Watchtower, bookstudy, KMS and 1.5 hours per 'sister talk': 1.75 hours on average per week
Field service : 2.5 hours to keep to the minimum of 10 hours per month to remain a good publisher
Getting ready for field service, including showering, putting on subtle Christian make-up so as to look sisterly and not to scare the householders, or taking off trousers and putting on dress or skirt, packing book bag, finding Watchtowers and Awakes and Reasoning Book and NWT and other books for the month @ 45 minutes per average field service trip (usually more): 1.5 hours assuming field service twice a week
Traveling to and from field service meeting and parking @ 20 minutes each way: 1.3 hours assuming field service twice a week
Socialising and finding seats before (@10 minutes) : 0.3 hours
Socialising, encouraging new publishers and children, sorting out maps, making new FS arrangement and traveling to territory (@ 30 minutes): 1 hour
Self-indoctrination, I mean personal study : 0 hours
Family-indoctrination, I mean family study : 0 hours
Total: About 19 hours a week
That's more than 80 hours every month, or about 1000 hours every year, just being a basic JW.
And that's before doing anything else, like building projects. (Yes I certainly did, steel wiring and tiling and painting at the local Bethel building project on weekends.)
And note, NO family study or personal study or daily texts.
This is two frigging working days a week of basic Being a JW 101!
well its been well over a year now that ive stepped foot into a kindgom hall.
it was a rough start with many mixed emotions that i know many of you can relate to.
over the past year ive learned so much about myself and others.
Hey Arthur
I agree with your friend about not discussing doctrine. Absolutely. It doesn't help to try and get family and friends to see things your way.
But there is one area where I disagree with your friend:
My friend told me to have compassion for my family in that they truly believe with 100% certainty that their beliefs are the truth.
No. One thing exJWs should never forget is that they, you, me, millions of other people, were once like your family, and yet now we are out. We didn't go from 100% to zero overnight.
That means that it's almost guaranteed that some of your family members are at 85%, or at 50%, or close to leaving but are still singing 'Let's watch how we walk and watch how we talk...'
Please don't treat them like mentally deficient people, but rather as people torn between how they feel and how they behave.
So your challenge is to not engage in discussion that forces them to be schizophrenic!
BB
.
ok, i'll start with myself.
i'm a nut job, hey i bet you never knew that !!!
Hey Sunshine
In Cape Town, South Africa, do we know sushi? Hell yes. Although my sushi teacher was Japanese, he's one-of-a-kind here. Most sushi chefs are local, or Singaporean, Taiwanese, Korean, Chinese...
Picture a fascinating and beautiful place where you can have gorgeous seafood between the mountain and the ocean. http://www.sleeping-out.co.za/ftp/Pictures/2951-D-10146.jpg
Imagine sushi at sunset. http://www.cellars-hohenort.com/images/Welcome/codfather.jpg
Wonderful stuff. http://www.tygervalley.co.za/uploadimages/capetownfish3.jpg
But okay, I'll take you up on your offer to enjoy sushi in California made by a sushi master anytime. I'll check my diary...
BB
posted this as a response on another thread, but i know there are people who want this as a new discussion.
i'm sure there are many good people watching these discussions who know you want to leave, but also know that this is what may await you - family alienation and pain.
if you haven't already overtly left, my advice to you is this: don't succumb to the disfellowshipping process.
Posted this as a response on another thread, but I know there are people who want this as a new discussion. So...
____________________
I'm sure there are many good people watching these discussions who know you want to leave, but also know that this is what may await you - family alienation and pain.
If you haven't already overtly left, my advice to you is this: don't succumb to the disfellowshipping process . Avoid it in any way you can. Read that again: avoid it in any way you can. Remove yourself from the self-appointed judicial authority of Jehovah's Witnesses.
In that way your family doesn't feel obliged to ignore you. Unless they are seriously hardcore, after time you will just become the wordly son/daughter/relative, but you'll still be able to (1) love them as hard as you can, (2) spend quality time with them, and perhaps even (3) subtly open their minds to what they're caught up in. (The third option is unlikely though!)
How to avoid the DF process?
Firstly, don't do anything, for now, that is a black-and-white disfellowshipping offence. Now is not the time to take up smoking or to set up home with the partner to whom you aren't married, or to appear in the newspaper as Santa Claus at your local mall.
But the following things are not DF offences: not attending meetings, not doing field service, spending time with non-JW friends, getting a good education, moving away from your home congregation, getting a good job, joining sports clubs, developing countless interests that aren't related to religion. The list is long. (Maybe that's another thread.)
Put a bit of time and space between yourself and the JW judiciary system.
Carry on loving your family and being a brilliant son/daughter/parent/aunt...
There is a rule, unwritten I believe, though I haven't read the elders' manual so I can't be sure, that if someone is not considered by their community as a JW for 5 years or so then they fall outside the ambit of the judiciary system. Some elders disregard this, but let's face it, their work is cut out for them spying on current members of the congregation, and gathering evidence and conducting hearings on those that choose to remain accountable to Jehovah's Witnesses.
Keep on loving your family.
And then one day, I hope and pray, one day you'll realise that you're free. No elder will care about calling you in. Hell, no congregation will consider you theirs to worry about!
All the best in your journey, and in discovering who you really are.
BB
well its been well over a year now that ive stepped foot into a kindgom hall.
it was a rough start with many mixed emotions that i know many of you can relate to.
over the past year ive learned so much about myself and others.
I'm sure there are many good people watching these discussions who know you want to leave, but also know that this is what may await you - family alienation and pain.
If you haven't already overtly left, my advice to you is this: don't succumb to the disfellowshipping process . Avoid it in any way you can. Read that again: avoid it in any way you can. Remove yourself from the self-appointed judicial authority of Jehovah's Witnesses.
In that way your family doesn't feel obliged to ignore you. Unless they are seriously hardcore, after time you will just become the wordly son/daughter/relative, but you'll still be able to (1) love them as hard as you can, (2) spend quality time with them, and perhaps even (3) subtly open their minds to what they're caught up in. (The third option is unlikely though!)
How to avoid the DF process?
Firstly, don't do anything, for now, that is a black-and-white disfellowshipping offence. Now is not the time to take up smoking or to set up home with the partner to whom you aren't married, or to appear in the newspaper as Santa Claus at your local mall.
But the following things are not DF offences: not attending meetings, not doing field service, spending time with non-JW friends, getting a good education, moving away from your home congregation, getting a good job, joining sports clubs, developing countless interests that aren't related to religion. The list is long. (Maybe that's another thread.)
Put a bit of time and space between yourself and the JW judiciary system.
Carry on loving your family and being a brilliant son/daughter/parent/aunt...
There is a rule, unwritten I believe, though I haven't read the elders' manual so I can't be sure, that if someone is not considered by their community as a JW for 5 years or so then they fall outside the ambit of the judiciary system. Some elders disregard this, but let's face it, their work is cut out for them spying on current members of the congregation, and gathering evidence and conducting hearings on those that choose to remain accountable to Jehovah's Witnesses.
Keep on loving your family.
And then one day, I hope and pray, one day you'll realise that you're free. No elder will care about calling you in. Hell, no congregation will consider you theirs to worry about!
All the best in your journey, and in discovering who you really are.
BB
.
ok, i'll start with myself.
i'm a nut job, hey i bet you never knew that !!!
Hey whiam
Next time I'm in Wisconsin I'll eat sushi with you.
Maybe some yummy tuna nigiri soaked in soya sauce, or a salmon rose or six, or just some avo maki with wasabi. Or another big platter of luscious salmon sashimi.
Stop me please.
BB
