Ruined marriages

greendawn

I just wish to know does the WTS have a deliberate policy of splitting married couples if one of the spouses leaves the org even if adultery is not involved? Do they at least indirectly encourage this to happen? And if yes is this a fairly recent policy? From what I read on the forum I get the impression that most marriages do disolve in the above situation.

Max Divergent

Well, I think it's more a result of the general indoctrination that of any specific policy.

They see a JW living with an XJW and think 'Cricky, they're living with a crocodile... mmmm.... maybe a bit of matchmaking or "encourgement" will help them improve their lot? They'll be much happier if I help thm get away from that beast...'

So, they go about doing stuff to help the marriage fall over thinking that they're helping out....

I don't beleive there's any specific policy or program, just interfering zealots

diamondblue1974

I am with Max on this one...no real policy as such just interfering busy bodies who have too much time on their hands.

DB

LittleToe

I'd agree with Max, too.

exJWs are so demonised, it's difficult (albeit evidently not always impossible) to keep the relationship in perspective.

I would posit that 75% of marriages fail where both leave (possibly due to the religion having been their main point of commonality) and 90% of marriages failing where one partner leaves and the other doesn't.
This would be anecdotal - I'd love to see empirical data on the subject.

LT, of the "my wife's still a Pioneer and I've got the failed marriage blues" class.

bavman

There is however the idea of "spiritual endangerment" which is specifically used by the borg as a reason for seperation.

ballistic

The answer is definately not. Many unbelieving partners join up to, sometimes after many years. I expect this phenomena would make an interesting psycology study.

Honesty

There is however the idea of "spiritual endangerment" which is specifically used by the borg as a reason for seperation. Describes me to a 'T'. APOSTATE BOB

jillbedford

I went back to JW meeting this past summer, like a big idiot. I hadn't been in ten years and thought, let's give it one last try. Maybe things have changed.

When it was disovered that my husband was a non-believer, there seemed to be a matchmaking commitee formed to find me a more suitable husband. Also it was mentioned if my husband said I could not attend meetings, this would be grounds for leaving him.

It doesn't suit the ideal to have a non-believer in the mix. One must have all ties nailing you the "stake" so there will be no leaving......or else you lose your everything.

tijkmo

the other thing to consider is that when one partner is disfellowshipped the other can have no spiritual association with them..no wt study no meeting prep no praying not for meals or anything else not even allowed to read the bible together...so the 'believing' partner who may well be the innocent victim in the case of adultery has to abide by the decision of the jc who may well have made the wrong decision as to the wrongdoers lack of repentance...it is an anomally that the greater your faith in the wts the more you are likely to abide by the rules and the less likely your marraige will survive even if both parties are in agreement as to being prepared to attempt a reconciliation..without those rules it may well be that both or either party is prepared to forgive and forget and move on and the marriage can survive

ValiantBoy

I grew up in a divided household. My father was an abusive husband, but my mom was forbidden by the elders to leave him. There marriage was horrible, but the cong always told her she had to stay. There was never any attempt to make them split up.

Their marriage is a lot better now...almost a model marriage. It's cool. Know when it got better? When mom quit going to meetings.

Ruined marriages

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