Thanks everyone for your concern. I have to say that this situation was not wholely unexpected. She had been having severe headaches most of the time for quite a while, and even though every possible avenue was pursued a remedy was not found. I am fairly certain I would have blown my head off a long time ago if I had to deal with that. I know what a short fuse I have when I have a pounding headache. Dealing with problems in that condition is extremely difficult. I know she didn't want to die, she just got too close to the edge this time and fell off.
Although in her situation I'm not sure it was the JW thing that pushed her over the edge or even caused the depression. It may have contributed, as I remember one time she spoke about how the elders were really messing up their family life and she was about ready to quit over it. I guess I'll never really know now. Speaking for myself, I know that when I quit the religion the thoughts of suicide I occasionally entertained completely went away, as did the nagging depression. I realize now that I could not live in a situation where no matter what I did or accomplished it was never enough. To be content in my life I need to be able to accomplish something, to be able to sit back and look at the finished product and feel good about it. I still get down when things are looking bad, but I am amazed as it may last half a day and then any feelings of depression are gone.
I am not looking forward to the "proselytizing" memorial talk. That whole mindset really gets under my skin now. I have said to myself I would never set foot in a KH again, but never say never. I just realized that this means that I will have to get a suit out and brush the dust off the shoulders and put a tie on. I went to a non JW funeral recently and I just wore a shirt and tie, thinking I would dress down a little from what I was used to as a JW. Man was I overdressed. I bet I was one of only a couple men with ties and the place was full.