Hello truman:
I was very moved by your post asking for help but am sorry I could not at the time offer any help as it struck a little too close to home for me.
I still deal with a bitter memory of how quick my brother was to threaten my parents with a trip to the elders if they did not stop me from visiting them or even talking on the phone to them when I was df'd.
My father's health was failing at the time and it was heart wrenching to hear of how much he asked for me.
I too would like to think it is just love that motivates one to turn on a family member but I often wonder if it is more influenced by the constant bombardment of how they are too think, act, feel, and speak. Then when they see someone err, even a family member, they are very quick to point the finger and feel the need to run to the elders to "straighten this person out".
Yes your son says he wants things back to the way they were, because then you fit into his ideal picture like the borg paints, of a perfect JW family. But those "pictures" are just that...only pictures, not reality. He may not get that picture back, but at least you will have a large measure of sanity not having to follow their lies.
The way Amazing helped his family is very loving and effective. I have read his account and hope to somehow use his example.
Again, glad things worked out OK for you.
Had Enough