Jumping Off Cliffs

by pettygrudger 10 Replies latest jw friends

  • pettygrudger
    pettygrudger

    While growing up, I can't remember the countless times my mother said "So, if you're friends all decided to jump off a cliff - would you?" in response to my comment that all my friends were "doing it".

    Now, as an adult, I realize that the JW's do EXACTLY the same thing, blindly following their predecessors, family & friends regardless of whether it's right or wrong, or whether it will be harmful to them mentally or emotionally. Perhaps that's an indication of society in general - ergo so many different cliques/groups/sects.

    Now that you've left the JW's, do you find that you still blindly follow? Do you voice dissent/disagreement with friends/family when you have an opposing point of view? Have you found that you can disagree or do/be "something different" without fear of backlash or rejection? If you were one that required that of your friends/family - have you learned to "let go" of the expectations that everything be in perfect harmony and accord? Do you relish disagreement & different points of view?

    I know I still have issues with that - but I'm definitely working on it.

  • Valis
    Valis
    Do you voice dissent/disagreement with friends/family when you have an opposing point of view?

    w/friends and colleagues yes and my brother who I talk to regularly, but the rest of my family I don't spend enough time around to even disagree w/them and I kind of like it that way.. And no I'm not afraid of backlash...If I am proven wrong then I apologize and get on with it.

    Sincerely,

    District Overbeer

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    Actually I think I tend to stop and pause and question more than I should since leaving. It is like I have a trust issue with a lot of things. I will not judge negatively at first, but I won't trust to just fall in line before being given a trust foundation first. It is like I am going in the opposite direction sometimes. I don't think that is healthy either.. Can't win sometimes..

  • Puternut
    Puternut

    I feel I owe it to myself to question things that don't agree with me. We are all unique individuals and we were given a brain for a reason. So if we don't use it and let other fill in the blanks for us, I think we are doing ourselves a disfavor. The 'truth' thingie was an experience for me. I don't regret having been in it, because now my eyes are opened. If I hadn't experienced it, I would have never known the difference. And I gave it my all. So yes now, when I don't agree with something, rather than giving someone else's viewpoint, I can finally utter myself in ways that I hadn't done in a long time. Of cource I respect the views of others, and I have to be tactful in my replies. But it feels good not to be spoon fed anymore. I don't follow other's blindly and never will again. I let my heart speak, and let my past experiences in life direct me. For once no one is going to tell me what I can or cannot do. Selfish? Perhaps, but as the saying goes; life is not a practice for things to come. And if I am wrong about my decisions, I will die with a smile on my face, because in my heart, I did what I thought was right for me. And if there is a God, he will know what was in my heart, and he will understand the reasons for my actions, due to my life's experiences.

    Puternut

  • Love_Truth
    Love_Truth

    All my friends are outside the JWs, and my siblings. Only a few of my family- Mom, Aunts, Cousins, etc are in- and they (with the occasional exception of Mom) won't speak to me anyway, so I have no problems with the issue you raised.

    Still, I have no problem making the local JWs uncomfortable in public places- walk up, say hi, start talking, just to see them turn red and run!! When an especially juicy tidbit is known about them, I make it public- very loudly!!

    I find it very amusing to turn their "punishmemnt" back on them.

  • onintwo
    onintwo

    It is fantastically liberating to be able to finally say what you're thinking. Gee, when I was "in" and my friends would sit around with me and have "conversations", no one ever deviated from the party line. Now, you know everyone doesn't agree at all times. But in the little make-believe JW world everyone does! Isn't that amazing?

    Everyone was afraid of the same thing. Being branded as spirtitually weak or worse yet, an apostate.

    The balance of my thoughts are parallel with Puternut.

    Onintwo

  • Brummie
    Brummie
    Do you voice dissent/disagreement with friends/family when you have an opposing point of view?

    I dont always voice my disagreements even if I do disagree, I like the fact that people can disagree with me. I think having been a JW and now being an EX has made me appreciate other peoples rights more so than I would have if I had never been a JW...if you know what I mean.

    Naturally I sometimes disagree just so I can cause a full blown argument ;)

    Brummie

  • Valis
    Valis

    Bad Kitty!

  • Xena
    Xena

    It has taken me awhile since leaving the dubs to feel at ease voicing my concerns and questioning people and situations I don't feel comfortable with. Being a (pretty much) submissive woman for most of my life it's a hard habit to kick. Also just going with the flow is so much easier than bucking the system. Especially when you aren't personally effected by something....

    Now if I don't feel like something is right or fair....I say so...I say so nicely most of the time...but I will be damned if I am going to be cowed into silence by anyone ever again like I was by the society. Gets me into trouble at times but such is life....

    Better to be a dead lion than a live dog

  • Gerard
    Gerard

    Man! I thought this was a cool thread on bungee jumping or hang gliding...

    As you were...

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