i've always been far too trusting of others, but i think i am beginning to outgrow that slowly but surely.
i've always had really low self-confidence and self esteem as well. i don't really know if it is due to my experience growing up as a JW....i think i would probably be in the same boat even if i hadnt been raised as a witness. i've always had a very bad tendency to evaluate my worth based purely on my looks, and i am such a perfectionist in that respect, so i never measure up. i'm hoping as i grow older i'll be able to rectify that.
When I left the organization (and all the time I spent in) I had absolutely NO self confidence. It was so bad that I would marvel at "leaders" and wonder what special mojo they had that entitled them to lead and make decisions, not only for themselves, but for everyone around them.
I never imagined that I would ever have that capacity.
It has taken years of harsh and sometimes brutal lessons, but I have finally learned that I do have the right to choose for myself... to lead others... and yes, even tell someone NO. No one controls me unless I grant them that right - which can be terminated at any moment should I decide.
*Gives Tink a swat on the bum to boost her self-confidence*
