Because she's in it for emotional reasons, not intellectual ones. Often fear
is what keeps people stuck. It's not like your wife is some unique case. It
happens all the time. People lived through 1975 and stayed.
This is the brutal truth of the situation. I heard a great quote
once...to paraphrase:
'You can't REASON people out of beliefs that they didn't REASON
themselves into in the first place!'
This is exactly why when you enter battle with a JW – full frontal assault,
armed with relevant facts and sound logic…it doesn’t budge them. The weapons of reason and evidence are only
meaningful on a different battlefield – and it’s not where the minds of true JW
believers reside.
The only response you can have, is to disconnect yourself (as much as
possible), from the outcome. If we have expectations that other people
see, and feel, and do as we would prefer, we set ourselves up for frustration
and disappointment. We can't control others. They don't meet our
expectations. They let us down.
It is a terrible irony that when dealing with JW family, we must emotionally
segregate ourselves (partially) from those we care for. But this is the truth of the matter. It is only within that narrow slice of
emotional segregation that we (on the outside) are able to sustainably exist
and deal with them. Any lack of precise
balance will compel you into delusion beside her (unlikely!), until you find it
insufferable, and then forcibly rejected for your lack of participation in such
delusion.
It is within that narrow slice that we can live. It is burdensome – but less so than living as
a true-believer in an abusive cult. So,
you’ve got THAT going for you. Within
that narrow slice you can strike a balance, catch your breath, and still be in
a relationship with your wife.
I wish you the best going forward. Let
us know how things go for you.
