The 10 point resolution adopted at the 2003 District Conventions (page 2)

ballistic

No appologies, your comments were spot on!

rocketman

Hey Betsy, welcome!

Ah yes, the resolutions. Glorious proclamations indeed. I liked No Apologies' resolutions a lot better!

Oh yes, and the one about bringing up children.....good point heathen. The kids were probably thinking, 'oh god, don't keep reminding my parents'

micheal

I have a top 10 list of my own

TOP 10 THINGS PEOPLE DO AT THE DISTRICT CONVENTION

10. Dose off

9. Daydream

8. Set your watch alarm for lunch

7. Count how many times the speakers use the words encourage

6. Take a walk in the corridor during the sessions just to piss off those "intimidating" attendants

5. Eat at your seat during the baptism talk

4. Take many many pictures during the drama

3. Think about what everyone else is doing on a beautiful saturday afternoon

2. Play hangman

1. Go to the bathroom every hour on the hour - but make sure to have a seat in the middle of the aisle.

Bendrr

1) Glorify ~~Jehovah~~ The Organization by continuing to ~~manifest "the fruits of holy spirit"~~ put on a good show. Cooperate with the spirit and The Organization.

'Nuff said.

2) ~~Offer "fruit of lips"~~ Keep up the "token service" since that's the best we can expect now to ~~give a public declaration of Jehovah's message~~ sell our cheap publications and keep the money rolling in.

"fruit of lips"? Remember their other term, "lip service"?

3) Continue to denounce ~~untruths~~ everything that are[is] not in line with ~~god's word~~ The Organization. Included were: evolution, idol worship, the trinity, etc.

"etc." meaning the internet, TV, radio, books, magazines, and spoken word that in any way disagrees with The Organization.

4) Bring up children in "discipline and mental regulation of ~~Jehovah~~ The Organization".

Beat the hell out of your kids daily. Lay the guilt on them mercilessly. Don't let them have friends, fun, or anything other than a steady diet of meetings and field service. And if they get molested - no, I'm not going there. (that last part not edited out in order to be brutally honest, but not continued because it's not something to joke about either)

5) Praise ~~Jehovah~~ The Organization by means of ~~our conduct~~ the show we put on for others in the Organization. This applies to all times and circumstances in our life when anyone is watching. When no one is watching, let guilt be your guide.

Act happy! Even if you're on a diet of every anti-depressant in the book and chasing them down with a fifth of scotch, please at least act happy!

6) Do not attribute to creatures what belongs to god. Don't give undue admiration to athletes, movie stars, etc.

On the other hand, The Organization speaks for God so should be treated as Divine therefore continue the worshipful ass-kissing of elders and other "heavies" and keep laying the gifts on them so we don't have to fork out the dough ourselves.

7) Maintain "Christain neutrality" in world affairs, even if it means being hated by the world.

WTF? You can vote, but don't. You can accept alternative military service, but don't. And just ignore that stuff about the U.N. We know you don't understand but just go along ok? Uh....the light gets brighter? Ok here's the deal: things are the same as they've always been, this is just "theocratic warfare" and you wouldn't even know about that if you had done what we told you a few years ago and not gone on the damn internet in the first place!

8) Give god glory by reading his ~~word~~ Organization's publications daily. Reject ~~propaganda~~ everything that is not with his Organization's word; make sure statements conform to the pattern of ~~"healthful words".~~ the Organization's rules.

Stay off the internet and don't read anything that isn't published by The Organization. But especially, stay off that damn internet! We'd have killed Al Gore years ago if we knew what was going to happen but the light didn't get brighter quick enough on that one.

9) Praise The Organization and Jehovah with "one mouth" in the Christain brotherhood. We should preach in unison.

<yawn!> Is anyone else getting an extremely bored sense of deja vu? That one I won't even touch, it's self-explanatory in it's bullshitness.

10) Give Jehovah glory by keeping his kingdom Organization first in our lives. We should use our energy and give all our "valuable things" to The Organization to reach this end.

We come first, understand? If you've got time to support yourself and spend time with your family, you've got time to get your lazy ass out there and sell some more magazines. If you've got the money to actually buy a house instead of renting, or send your kids to college, or buy a decent car, or take a vacation, or not be on welfare, or afford food every day then you're not contributing enough so let's get those dollars flowing people!

Mike. (and to think, I still haven't eaten dinner yet. Think I just lost my apetite!)

Pork Chop

My observation was that people didn't get too excited over this, many just looked like the wondered what was going on and when was it going to be over.

minimus

Don't you see history being made? You see, the 10 point resolution of the 2003 District Convention was prophetic. If you read the 119th Psalm, you will clearly see how this resolution fulfilled Bible prophecy and the giving of thanks.

one

You people don't appreciat spititual things, you should seriously consider that the resolutions declared 8 decades ago in Cedar Pint Ohio were...sorry i can't rembember the rest of it but they were really important, your life depend on it..

heathen

bendrr---------- you definately seem to be in touch with the jw spin on things . 3) Continue to denounce ~~untruths~~ everything that are[is] not in line with ~~god's word~~ The Organization. Included were: evolution, idol worship, the trinity, etc . Of course this has nothing to do with the WT untruths that are more and more obvious to anyone who knows antything about the organization .

LDH

I can't find the thread I started a while ago about expecting a new resolution,

but here is Metatron's post in response to it.

Lisa

Prophetess Class

SYN

If I could secretely slip this piece of paper onto the speaker's podium when no-one was looking, here's what would be written on it:

1. All Witnesses should try and think of new words to describe those who are trying to leave the Truth. Drifting, fading, glossing, burking, ratcheting, tacking, freeping, janjering, and looing being good examples. The more words there are, the more classes we can create, and we love making new classes of people. <clapclap>

2. On that point, Witnesses should try to encourage those who are fading (or freeping, or janjering, or tacking) to rejoin the wonderful loving Brotherhood (we'd never call it a Sisterhood, this is after all a patriarchical Theocracy!) by citing examples of wonderful spiritual activities that the aforementioned doubting ones can attend. For example, we could tell them how nice the Get-Togethers and Bible Games are.

3. As Witnesses, we should not have blood transfusions, unless we have a transfusion composed of all the blood components, seperated earlier, and then recombined again. Since we're allowed to have transfusions of blood fractions, why not take all of the blood fractions at once? That way we please both Jehover and the lawyers, eh?

4. Child abuse? What child abuse? Oh, that child abuse! That wasn't us! It was only a few bad people!

5. Smurfs are now acceptable, as long as they are not brought with to the Kingdom Hall by children (or adults, as the case may be).

6. Go out more in Field Service. All publishers should take high-pressure sales courses if they can, so as to place more literature with members of the public. MORE! MORE! MORE! We need money for another chandelier at Patterson! The other one's getting lonely!

7. All publishers should stay far away from any sort of Apostofest. There are horned people in attendance at these things, so we hear.

8. On that note, the Internet is BAD! Absolutely every last router and hub is demonized, except the official, Jehover-endorsed servers hosting Watchtower.org!

9. You didn't hear it from us, but we might be allowing people to celebrate birthdays again, provided they promise not to cut off heads during the celebrations.

10. This year, the only acceptable clothing for Sisters being baptized is the T-Back brazilian-style thong. Yes, you heard right. Brothers, please don't push when you're spectating at the pool. That is all.

The 10 point resolution adopted at the 2003 District Conventions

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