I HATE JW funerals

by jws 42 Replies latest jw friends

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  zeb

  At a jw funeral the 'service' was barely over and one sister could be heard asking about (the coming weekends) "Field service arrangements."

  At another there was a service at the kh and everyone treated it like a f*** meeting all gathering in their little in there 'look at me groups', complete with air weight comments and gestures and had to be told to sit down as the service (they used "service") was about to start.

  The most recent was much the same with everyone jabbering on like a bunch of monkeys only finally only just shuting up as the coffin was wheeled in.

  I felt like yelling at them!

  Jw funerals then reveal

  • no sense of the occasion
  • no respect
  • and plain absence of manners.
    
• 

  gone for good

  It has been said that JWs shoot their wounded, so it's not surprising that their dead are sloughed off exactly like "Old Light"... buried quickly and never to be brought up again.

  All the horrible JW funerals are for the very "Millions...who will never die." so really each funeral is a testament to their batshit crazy doctrine and prophecies.
• 

  TerryWalstrom

  I wrote this after the last JW funeral I attended when my best friend (JW) died.
  _____
  
  

  I DON'T LIKE FUNERALS

  
  
  I don’t think I cadaver bring myself to cheer a casket

  I ignore funeral requests, (you shouldn’t even ask it)

  Of corpse, it's fun to lift a few--if friends are sad--I’ll cheer them

  But once old chums have been embalmed--I won’t be going near them!

  
  

  When all is said, a suicide is simply sad and sorry

  I say, “Heave ho-- he’s gotta go” and then we’ll throw the party.

  I’ve got no urge to hum a dirge or set their ashes on the sill

  I’m asking where the cash is and-- “Am I in his will?”

  
  

  His epitaph might make me laugh: “I told them I was sick”

  One chuckle or a snicker at a funeral? I’m a dick!

  A photo is a no-no even if the Wake band rocks

  Ain’t nuthin healthy ‘bout a selfie with a stiff who’s in a box

  
  

  I don’t dig graves or funerals--I’m just the sort who worries

  I’ll have to give the eulogy or visit mortuaries.

  It’s all just way too scary when they bury poor old Fred

  I guess I’ve watched too many seasons of the Walking Dead.

  
  

  __________

  I DON'T LIKE FUNERALS
• 

  stillin

  One of the elders here in the "go to" guy for funeral talks. He shows no emotion but he plows through the outline like a slow freight train. This is viewed as good and there are always pats on the back and handshakes afterwards.
• 

  Ding

  I'm surprised they haven't thought of having JWs video the funeral talk for playback at their own funerals.

  That way, they could go out of the world counting time.

  Maybe I shouldn't have posted this.

  Some WT spy might decide it's a great idea and recommend it to the GB.
  
• 

  minimus

  When my mom died a good friend gave the sales pitch. I agree, maybe three minutes of my mother’s life then.... what she believed in. The rest of the 45 minutes was a JW preaching session. I was disappointed but not surprised. When my brother died last year, that elder actually made my brother sound like a real friend, father, brother, elder.
• 

  MidwichCuckoo

  Gosh...so much I recognise. My father's funeral was a one hour 'talk' at the KH, followed by a shorter talk at the crematorium. I don't recall anything about his life being mentioned, it was just a sales pitch. Sad.

  My mother, who is very elderly, requested me to take her to the KH for her funeral...but her congregation has been moved now (that KH is on the market, as I mentioned in another thread), and she doesn't recognise/accept the Hall she now attends as a KH (obviously, her advanced age adds to her confusion). So what do I do (if she pre-deceased me) ?

  Funnily enough Stan, I was considering the same myself, not telling the Congregation. I've seen my mother make them her whole life (at the expense of her family), and at the same time I've seen other elderly JWs discarded once they are considered a burden, but she always dismissed my observations...and now she is in that position but making excuses for them not visiting her anymore, e.g., 'they have families'...so did you mother, but we still came a poor second behind any of the JWs.
• 

  Finkelstein

  JWS funerals are used to support the religion's doctrine of every lasting life bullshit, mankind wont have to suffer death anymore etc.

  Its a sales pitch to the ones attending the funeral.

  People have called them a 30 minute infomercial for the WTS.
  

  After the talk JWS zone in on non JWS and ask well what do you think of the talk, as it was means to recruit., complete with glowing smiles as JWS are brainwashed to do accordingly.
  

  I will never attend another JWS funeral the last was my mother's
  
• 

  scotsman

  It’s a shame this is how they’re done now. My father’s JW funeral, 27 yrs ago, was primarily about him, given by someone who knew him really well and managed to be funny and warm on a very dark day.
• 

  Tobyjones262

  You and me 100x. When I went last it was for my wifes sibling. It was nothing but a recruitment speech. made me want to puke. I went for my wife but could not go and sit down I stood in the back. You not only have to listen to this shit but not say anything.