I gladly don't have any friends,family,and relatives that are witnesses who are going to shun me.
Truelove,
I'm a non-witness who has gone down the path you're going. I read the sentence above and I have to ask you - do those words, in any way, sound selfish? I think I can speak to you on a different level.
Sweetheart, you are coming from an environment where anything other than unconditional love is considered maniacal. You can make just about any decision you want and your loved ones can express their displeasure but will continue to love you, speak to you, interact with you and hope nothing but the best for you. YOU KNOW NOTHING ELSE. This is our norm. Should you discontinue this JW path, your family will appreciate your decision, but the notion of being welcomed back like the prodigal son in the Scriptures who physically left?... Little different for those of us who have nothing to lose. Social media, telecommunications devices etc allow us to remain in touch with family and YOUR FAMILY WON'T BE TOLD BY ANYONE TO ABANDON YOU. Given what I've read so far, I suspect that you wouldn't do so well if this happened to you.
When I applied the ramifications of failing to follow a rule and having NOBODY communicate with me for many years and quite possibly the rest of my life... I'm talking immediate family who you spent all of your formative 21 years with... I don't know about you, but I can't breathe. It sounds weird, but seriously, all we have is our imagination. Close your eyes and try to make it real.
I don't know where you are in their lesson plan, but putting yourself under this yoke for her sake and suffering together is not love. That little voice inside of you that's suggesting that something's not right is going to get louder as you continue down this road of oppression. I came to realize that what they do speaks so loudly that it's hard to hear what they're saying. One poster describes their actions as making weapons out of a person's loved ones. Is that the future you want for your family? Do you really want to co-sign onto that?
Do you even remember what truly unconditional love and support is from within a religious institution? I need for you to go back to where you were before subscribing to JWism and imagine how proud of your past you would be if you two could walk into a church - hand and hand, and get an opportunity to sit next to the girl of your dreams. You could proudly introduce her as your future wife. This would be followed by a "congratulations" and an immediate respect for the two of you being honest and the potential future of your relationship by those around you with a loving and supportive respect for the "arrangement" that you two are pursuing. I think you know she would collapse into the welcoming arms of the love, support and acceptance the two of you would receive.
Which environment seems more loving to you right now? Forget doctrine. Despite what you're being told - that's not God. Love is. Sincerely think about it. Which do you want to proudly offer people? The one you're pursuing or the one you've left?
Don't forget, he who the Son sets free is free indeed. She is not free - and right now, neither are you.
