The Pope Driving a Limo

by Bleep 6 Replies latest social humour

  • Bleep
    Bleep

    The Pope had just finished a tour of the Florida East Coast and was taking a limousine to the airport. Having never driven a limo, he asked the chauffeur if he could drive for a while.
    Well, the chauffeur didn't have much of a choice, so he got in the back of the limo and the Pope took the wheel.He turned onto I-95 and accelerated to about 90 MPH.
    WHAM!
    The blue lights of the State Highway Patrol flashed in his rearview mirror.
    He pulled over and a trooper came to his window.When the trooper saw
    who it was, he said, "Just a moment, please, I need to call in."
    The trooper radioed in and asked for the chief.
    He said, "I have a REALLY important person pulled over and I need to know what to do."
    The chief replied, "Who is it, not Ted Kennedy again?"
    The trooper said, "No, even more important."
    It isn't the Governor, Jeb Bush, is it?" asked the chief.
    "No, even more important," replied the trooper.
    "It isn't the President, George Bush, is it?"
    "No, replied the trooper, "even more important.
    "Well, WHO The HECK is it?!" screamed the chief.
    The trooper responded :
    "I don't know for sure but I think it might be Jesus, because his chauffeur is the Pope!"

  • Quotes
    Quotes

    The Pope dies and goes to heaven {of course}, Saint Peter is showing him around.

    They come to this big room an millions of CATHOLICS are having a party, The Pope said " I knew it------- I knew we where RIGHT!"

    They walk on to the next room, its full of millions of HINDUS they're all playing bingo.

    They come yet to another room full of atheists and they are all on a huge beach drinking rum and cokes.

    "WOW!" says the Pope "I had no idea".

    They come to the last room, but the door is shut.

    "Who's in there?" the Pope askes.

    "Quiet!" says Saint Peter. "That's full of Jehovah's Witnesses they think they're the only ones up here!"

  • Quotes
    Quotes

    Hoping that since you have time to start JOKE threads (i.e. fluff) you will respond to the questions I posted in the "CULT" thread: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=34246&page=3&site=3

    Come on BLEEP, I provided a numbered list. You could at least respond to one of them (and if/when you do, please be sure to show which question you are answering by using the corresponding number, so that there can be no claims of "unetical behavior" or "libel").

    ~Quotes

    http://quotes.jehovahswitnesses.com

    Edited by - Quotes on 14 August 2002 18:3:45

  • Bleep
    Bleep

    I did answer one of the questions. I want to take some time thinking about the rest. You did give me a little chuckle with the joke.

    I think there will be 144,000 in heaven but the rest that are in Gods favor will be on earth as planned. They do not have to be JW's to have the gift of life.

  • Scully
    Scully

    Bleep writes:
    >>>I think there will be 144,000 in heaven but the rest that are in Gods favor will be on earth as planned. They do not have to be JW's to have the gift of life.<<<

    So if a person doesn't HAVE to be a JW 'to have the gift of life', then why would anyone need to be a JW? What's the point in going door-to-door to bring more people to "the Truth"(tm) if it's not necessary for them to attain salvation??

    You've got some 'splainin' to do, Bleep.

    Love, Scully

  • Bleep
    Bleep

    wow you love me?

    It would just be pleasing to Jehovah to do what is right in God's eyes now. Jesus started the public door to door preaching. A question to you if you want to answer is why would Jesus want to stop the preaching of what will come for all mankind?

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    Jesus started the public door to door preaching

    Ok, if you say so.

    Mark16: 15 He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation. 16 Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned. 17 And these signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; 18 they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well."
    19 After the Lord Jesus had spoken to them, he was taken up into heaven and he sat at the right hand of God. 20 Then the disciples went out and preached everywhere, and the Lord worked with them and confirmed his word by the signs that accompanied it.

    why would Jesus want to stop the preaching of what will come for all mankind?

    The wt natters on about being the closest thing to original christianity. Why would jesus want to stop the preaching of being saved through baptism, and the signs that he said would accompany this preaching? If the signs stop, maybe that means that jesus isn't confirming the preaching, there is no validity in wt preaching, since they are preaching something different?

    SS

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