Looking for recruits!

by The_Bad_Seed 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • The_Bad_Seed
    The_Bad_Seed

    I am starting a zine by the name of Asleep!, and am looking for mock articles, humor, cartoons, experiences, anything worthy of print looking in on the WTS. No submissions will be taken from Naeblis -- he is really a zealous travelling overseer serving YHWH in the Pacific Northwest!

  • avengers
  • luvmylife
    luvmylife

    Oh Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease.....let me in on this one!!!!!!!!!!!

    ps - loved the glossary guide.

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    LOL!! Avengers that is dam funny...OUTLAW

  • Scully
    Scully

    TBS, old buddy old pal.....

    Here's one! I wrote it all by myself too.

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=23040&site=3

    Love, Scully

  • avengers
    avengers

    Outlaw.

    I'm sorry if I hurt you.

    I can't stop laughing myself when I look at this.

  • SpiderMonkey
    SpiderMonkey

    LOL, Scully, I missed that one the first time around. Thank goodness for Number Two.

    I mean TIME NUMBER TWO, you PERVERTS!!! As you all know, I am working humbly and steadfastly toward reinstatement, waiting on Jehover to hear my pleas. During this 'movement' back into the Organization, I must be strong, and, as the Apostle Saul said, "Beat my [sphincter] and lead it as a slave"!

    (GOOD one, Scully )

  • Jourles
    Jourles

    Yo whassup brutha's an sistah's. The M servant is in tha house. Jman is down wit this whole article writin' thang. I could take a break from mah other colum writin' cause this whole thang is just up tha M servants alley. Word is bond.

    Those wack ass mofo's in the uppa echelon's of Brooklyn may have all you otha bitches running scared wit talk of df'in, but this BAD ASS ain't running no place from no old punk ass geezer's. The Jman is tha top servant in his hall. Ain't no other servant be dealin' the rags wit a QUICKNESS like the Jman. I always gots to tell tha otha M servants to step off of the Jman's territory cards too. Those wannabe, polyester suit wearin, M servants can't even cycle the freakin cards right. It always makes the Jman look bad when the cards get all upside down and backwards. Shit man.

    Damn, why just last night at tha service meetin', this freaky sistah named Julie Sparks steps up to tha rag counta all smilin' and shit. The Jman thought she wuz straight trippin'. Julie sayz to the Jman, "Hi Brother J. I had ordered some of the 2002 calendars and wanted to know if they came in yet or not. Also, do you have my latest magazines?" Jman wuz about to go Moo Goo Gai Pan on this bitch's ass becuz she hadn't picked up her rags in abouts three months and her stack was gettin real HIGH in the box o' lit. Is it tha Jman's fault that she had been ridin tha PO's son like a Greyhound bus? Us M servants heard it thru the vine that sistah Sparks had a shortie on tha way and she had to hit tha clinic to take care of a little bidness, know wut I'm sayin'? I ain't even gonna go into tha calendar thang, I gave those out to brutha Age months back. He neva know wut day it is. All us M servants thought he would be a good candate fo a allzheimer study or sumthin'.

    I gots sum tight shit on tha PO right now. He knowz it too. He came up to tha Jman and aks him to tha back room afta last Sunday's WT study. The Jman knew tha shit was 'bout to hit, so he reach'd for his cold steel mike in his front jacket pocket and calmly wrapped that dayz WT rag 'round tha mike in a stelth-like fashon. That wack ass Jerry's Kid of a PO started frontin' about his little shortie an sistah Sparks. He wuz tellin tha Jman he betta not hear about no leakage of this "affair." If itz one thang in tha hall that everyone knows, they all knowz not to talk to the Jman like he'z sum little playa, becuz the Jman gotsta heavy dope on all tha wannabe playas in tha hall. They knowz the Jman can put tha smack down harder than any CO or DO that steps up to tha eight ball. Jman be droppin' plates on yo ass if you cut him, know wut I sayin'? So anyway, this PO wuz about to get his quick trip to Paradise wit one whack of mah cold steel mic wrapped in tha WT when his fine ass daughta walks in and tellz her dad that they gotsta go hit Pizza Hut befo their all-you-can-eat buffet ended. I spared his wack ass that day. His next may not be so lucky.

    Mah supa-fly hoopty was waitin' fo me outside to take it fo a ride up the boulevard. There's nutin' like takin' a trip in yo fly ass ride wit the souped up windshield wipers sportin' the three way blades and the kickass red holders. All mah M Servant homies know that tha 'Hood Crawla is tha shit in the KH lot. It be gettin' all of our bitches back and fro to tha hall and out in the service of tha lord. Hence tha shortie name - 'Hood Crawla. It don't go supa fast, but wit all mah supa fly gear from JC Whitney installed, it be the baddest ride in the lot. Dope.

  • MarchOn
    MarchOn

    U da man J !

  • Simon
    Simon

    ha ha ... love the title - Asleep!

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