shit for brains.
Husband addressed himself as "Used to be a JW"
by UBM101 16 Replies latest jw experiences
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jgnat
I am married to one of those, an admitted shallow thinker. I simply expose him to non-threatening worldly activities and let his nature do the rest. Once in a while - not very often - I will challenge him WHY something or another is WRONG? I give natural, worldly examples that go against the grain of his thinking. If he starts spouting Witnessisms, I drop it.
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steve2
JWs who avoid discussions and are on the - ahem - shallow thinking side - are more prone to emotional displays and/or withhdrawal if you even tentatively raise certain ideas. They train their spouses well to tippy-toe around the topic of doubt. Fair enough. The important point is they either will not and/or cannot reason well and have a strong tendency not to 'join the obvious dots'. The question to ask yourself is not so much about them but yourself:Do you have the will, the patience and the skills to live with someone whose thinking abilities are so stunted? For some it will be "Yes, cause they are loving, considerate spouses and we have a wonderful relationship if we avoid the topic."
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Mum
I'm sure you're familiar with the term "cognitive dissonance." It's a natural phase in the process of leaving a cult. Give him some time. It took me two years (which I think is typical) to deprogram myself. See if you can get thim to read Dr. Wayne Dyer's Your Erroneous Zones and some other self-hep books. He needs to learn to think ratioinally instead of emotionally.
Best wishes!
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sarahsmile
When talking about the bible find the positive and common love, for example I am happy to be on this side of Jesus sacrifice. Anything about Jesus is positive. Becareful with scriptures. Hopefully your husband some day reads another bible.
By now you know the most heated debates not just for JW but for the history of Christianity. I learned to avoid them. Anything with heated debates. The birth of Christ and Christmas,Trinity,GOD.
Your husband by stating he is no longer a JW is a big step! Is he disfellowshipped or disassociated?
Hopefully his family will choose to continue associate with him.
Your husband could celibrate holidays with you but may never believe in the holidays. It is hard to believe in something that you dont! He still will be the same person no matter what.
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UBM101
jgant will be along and she may have some tips, her husban finally broke free and exited WT.
Thats the best news I have heard! Congrat jgnat! Finally!
Thanks to all for your advice. I will keep updating here...
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UBM101
Sarasmille, he is neither DA or DFed. Still going to memorial annually bu not sure about this year. I hope not but if he does, I pray that it will sow more seed of doubt in him even more.