My decision to openly greet df persons in the hall (page 2)

KateWild

Well I am df'd, and I am going to talk to all of you, thank you all for talking to me too. I have a few really close friends who still speak to me. Its all in secrecy though, because my JC will use it as just one more reason to keep me out.

At an assembly one of my close freinds sat next to me and wrote me a note instead of paying attention to the talk. Then in the lunch break another friend from a language group gave me a hug and kiss, and we stood there in plain sight having a good old chit chat. She instigated the conversation and affection.

My JC said I had the wrong attitude for this LOL! They also told me off when a df'd brother gave me a hug and kiss goodbye outside the hall as we were leaving. He came to me!!!???? we were both df'd at the time. He is reinstated now.

There are some truly wonderful people who are JWs, that are only doing what they think is right, I actually have just come in from visiting one of my friends in my hall. He has an excuse though, he is allowed to talk to me because he is an elder.

Kate xx

dropoffyourkeylee

Several times at funerals in the Kingdom Hall I have seen disfellowshipped relatives of the deceased and I have always gone out of my way to give a huge hug and offer my condolences. They have always seemed to appreciate it, and no one has ever approached me about it. I just think it is the right thing to do under the circumstances.

However, the regular meetings are another matter, as some have noted. If the disfellowshipped one is at a regular meeting, they probably are trying to get back in, so they may not appreciate the attention.

DesirousOfChange

I know of 2 DF persons working together - cleaning business.

Neither opposed to the Truth, and one working to get reistated.

The one working hard to get reinstated was told that (s)he should not be associating (choosing to work) with the other DFd person if they expected to get back in.

Pharisees can make up the rules as they go along.

Doc

respectful_observer

We once had a situation where there were several teens/early 20s who were all disfellowshipped and attending meetings. They all sat together and gave each other friendly greetings when they arrived then stayed after the meeting ended and had normal conversations together. The elders had a mini-freak out since they weren't skulking around in silence like a repentant DF'd person is expected to, but techinically no one was breaking any rules. The elders finally decided that since visitors might not realize they were DF'd because they would be seen as acting normally with those around them, it could cause a stumbling block and raise questions about whether they were truely repentant.

KateWild

The elders had a mini-freak out

Its quite entertaining when the elders loose their power LOL! The teens were repentant as they all went to the meetings, so none of them should have been df'd in the first place according to Christ, and the bible.

But is showed them what nonsence it all is, they carried on as normal, good for them LOL!

Kate xx

BluesBrother

This might make the greeter feel good, but it does not help the d/f'd one little bit. They are under pressure to behave as they should. I would not like the 'Pharisees' to deny them reinstatement because they are known to be in conversations with bro's at the meetings !

It can happen......

adamah

If someone really wanted to show TRUE LOVE and help the DFed person, they wouldn't be going to meetings, etc in the first place. The policy is BS, and you can only vote with YOUR feet, accepting a personal responsibility for your helping perpetuate a harmful practice. Your attempts to show basic human compassion is only likely to be read as a sign that some JWs have a sense of compassion, thus confirming that the decision to seek reinstatement is correct (as confirmed by the chilling words of Kidding Me, above who said):

Kidding me said-

I have been wondering about this more lately. I always smile at DF'd ones, especially the youth. I've heard from some that got reinstated that it's encouraging.

Showing basic human dignity is breaking the official policy, and only allows the "I refuse to shun" person to alleviate THEIR guilty conscience, since the person KNOWS it's wrong to shun others, but is too weak to actually do the 'right thing' and walk out of the KH and never come back (whatever the personal consequences to them may be).

Remember the old saying, "what if they had a war, and no one showed up to fight?" The same thing goes for JWs: "what if they held a meeting, and no one showed up?"

Simply by showing your shining smiling face at the KH, your presence says you're supporting the JW nonsense. Trying to reform from within is pointless, as it should be clear that it's a human-made group.

Adam

Gayle

You are too loving for the WTS,,you will be counselled. Because you are going ahead of the organization, and not "waiting on Jehovah."

Dagney

I always greeted df'd ones, usually told them "nice to see you" when I saw them at the meeting. Elders never said a word. I also talked at length with a well known df'd elder at his grandsons funereal. Elders never said a word.

always always follow your heart and conscience.

Daniel1555

Thanks for your experiences. Of course I will not make a big show of it. I know that the df one appreciates a greeting. I don't care anymore of those crazy and unloving rules. I am ready to stand for my conscience. At the moment I think it is the best not to just walk away and not attend meetings anymore. I know though that this moment will come sooner or later. My wife wants me to tell the elders about my conscience decision to accept blood in a life and death situation. So maybe sooner or later I 'll be able to be free from all those crazy rules. Even if I am mentally free already, it is so difficult to hear all this nonsense especially in wt studies and to see how others in the congregation (especially my wife and her family) enjoy all these false reasonings.

My decision to openly greet df persons in the hall

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