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Jehovah's Witnesses use shunning
The McMinnville family members in the murder-suicide had been outcasts.
SUSAN TOM
Statesman Journal
March 21
Her mother considered her as good as dead.
Her own children wouldn't have anything to do with her.
It's been a decade since Susan Todd left the fold, but the former Jehovah's Witness remembers the isolation, loneliness and depression that engulfed her when family, friends and congregation members shunned her.
She sought counseling this week because the murder-suicide in McMinnville brought back those overwhelming feelings of fear and despair.
Robert Bryant, a McMinnville landscaper who police think killed his wife and four children before taking his own life, also was shunned by family and friends after he was ousted from the Jehovah's Witnesses congregation in Shingle Springs, Calif.
Jehovah's Witnesses believe that shunning is necessary to ensure that the expelled member does not corrupt the flock.
Todd recalled how her entire support structure disappeared after she left the close-knit community she had known since birth. She used to awaken in a panic in the middle of the night, wondering what she had done.
"You're not just leaving a religion, you're leaving a whole way of life," said Todd, 52.
Nicholas Petersen, who presides over the Kingdom Hall, Lancaster congregation in Salem, said people are drawn to the religion because members avoid immorality, don't believe in hell and are family-oriented, friendly and warm.
"What I find is, they're lasting friendships," Petersen said. "They don't dissipate. Our feelings don't change, they just grow."
A strong faith
Jehovah's Witnesses are happy despite all the troubles on Earth because they have confidence that God will set matters right in the future, he said.
"We find Scriptures give us enduring hope," said Petersen, who grew up as a Jehovah's Witness. Neither he nor the congregation condone Bryant's actions.
People may want to blame the religion because they don't approve or understand it, he said, but members abhor violence.
"We have always been a very peaceful people," Petersen said. "We detest criminal activity."
For Robert Bryant, whose lifelong bonds were severed abruptly three years ago, finding peace was difficult.
The problems began when Bryant, troubled by what he saw as hypocrisy among members, started losing faith.
Mark Messier Sr., a spokesman for the Jehovah's Witnesses in Shingle Springs, a small town east of Sacramento, said Bryant acted in a manner that was not in keeping with biblical standards. When he showed no signs of changing or penitence, elders voted to oust him.
The shunning deeply affected his wife, Janet Bryant, who was upset that congregation members wouldn't greet her in the store. She felt fatigued and drained, her sister said in an earlier news report.
Family, friends and other Jehovah's Witnesses who Robert Bryant had known his entire life gave him the cold shoulder.
His father disassociated himself from the landscaping business they had built.
Other church members pulled their business from him, according to news reports. Eventually, he filed for bankruptcy.
Petersen of Salem defended shunning as part of scriptural principles. He points out that Catholics have excommunication and other religions practice different forms of shunning, as well.
"We have certain biblical standards," Petersen said. "When one is a gross violator of them, they could be expelled.
If they're remorseful, they can come back. It's because of that loving family arrangement that many do return."
When the Bryants left California last year to start a new life in Oregon, they brought their wounds along. Bryant freely told new contacts about his split from the congregation and the move from his family in California, according to Yamhill County District Attorney Bradley Berry.
A sister of Janet Bryant's who visited the family in Oregon last December said Robert seemed depressed and stressed.
A family separated
Meghan Bernier, the first in the Todd family to leave the Witnesses, said although she did what was right for her, it still hurt to leave.
Her letters were returned unopened and no one went to her wedding. Her eldest sister, whom she once was close to, even dropped their father and his suitcases off at a food line so she wouldn't be in the same parking lot as Bernier when she picked him up during a visit to Virginia Beach, Va.
"It's like having a best friend to turn to all the time, then all of a sudden, because you didn't choose their path, they're gone," said Bernier, 30.
Jerry Bergman, a professor at Northwest State College in Archbold, Ohio, and author of several books on Jehovah's Witnesses, said members who question their beliefs or the church often stay in the organization because shunning by family and friends would be more painful.
The organization's rules reach into all areas of life, yet offer few effective guidelines for life outside the fold, said Bergman, a licensed professional clinical counselor and former Jehovah's Witness.
While some Mennonites and Amish also practice shunning, they don't take it to the degree Jehovah's Witnesses do, Bergman said. In other religions, a member must do something very bad to be shunned, he said, whereas with Witnesses, merely questioning the beliefs or those members in positions of authority is grounds for disfellowship.
Benton Johnson, a retired University of Oregon professor specializing in the sociology of religion, said Bryant probably was emotionally devastated by the separation. Witnesses believe the man is the spiritual head of the family, Todd said, and all that happens in life is because you have chosen to leave the protection of God's organization.
Bryant seemed to be doing well in Oregon, but Todd believes Bryant felt pain and loneliness because he couldn't share his success with his parents and siblings.
Maybe he thought he was taking a shortcut because Witnesses believe death absolves sin so they could be born in a new earth without sin, Todd said.
"(Maybe) he felt the only hope for his family was for them to die and be awakened in the glorious new and perfect world."
Susan Tom can be reached at (503) 399-6744.
About Jehovah's Witnesses
BELIEF
Jehovah's Witnesses believe in the Bible as the Word of God. They consider the New and Old Testaments to be inspired and historically accurate. They believe in one God, a Spirit Being with a body but not a human one, and that there is no Trinity. They believe they are living in the final days of Armageddon and that only 144,000 Witnesses are selected by Jehovah to rule with Christ in Heaven.
The rest of the Witnesses will live forever on the new earth.
GLOSSARY
Armageddon: the war between the forces of Christ and Satan in which the world will be destroyed.
The Great Crowd: Subjects of the kingdom — those Witnesses who are not among the chosen — will be ruled by Jesus and the 144,000.
Numbers: There were 979,637 Jehovah's Witnesses in the United States in 2001; one in 285 people in the U.S. is a witness. There are 11,582 congregations.
Jehovah: Hebrew name for God.
Kingdom Halls: Place of worship. Most don't have windows by design so witnesses can focus on meetings.
Witnessing: Witnessing and active sharing of their faith with others is fundamental because Jehovah's Witnesses consider it part of their individual responsibility to follow Jesus's example and go from house to house to speak to people about the gospel of Christ. Such field service constitutes a showing of neighborly love. There are other ways to witness, including conversations, letters, phone calls and mail literature.
Collection: None are ever taken at Kingdom Halls and convention auditoriums of Jehovah's Witnesses. Boxes are placed so that it is convenient for any who wish to contribute to do so. No one knows what or if others give. You pay for literature and ask for donations when you distribute it.
Shunning: A practice by Jehovah's Witnesses to separate themselves from former Witnesses who have been disfellowshipped. Witnesses avoid contact and all types of dealings with former members, even if they are relatives or friends.
Disfellowship: Expulsion from the congregation by elders for actions not in keeping with biblical principles or the organization's rules.
Disassociation: Voluntary departure from the congregation. The organization's new policy directs Witnesses to treat them the same way as those who have been disfellowshipped.
Apostate: Any Witness who questions the beliefs, those Witnesses in positions of authority, or the Jehovah's Witnesses organization. Apostasy is grounds for disfellowship. There is no forgiveness for an apostate, who will not have a chance to be resurrected in the new earth structure.
Watchtower, Awake: Jehovah's Witnesses publications
PRACTICES
Holidays: Only wedding anniversaries and the day Christ died are considered special days. All other holidays are considered pagan.
Meetings: Held five times a week, usually on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Sundays. More than one meeting can be held on those days.
OTHER KEY VIEWS
Abortion is wrong and homosexuality is a serious sin.
Gender roles are defined with men as the head of the household and women as caretakers who assist the husband in teaching the children.
Divorce is permitted under certain circumstances, but remarriage is frowned upon unless the divorce was a result of adultery.
Service in the armed forces or any form of allegiance to government is prohibited because one must show allegiance only to the Kingdom of Christ.
Blood transfusions, along with ingesting blood, are considered wrong, because God said the soul is in the blood. Bone marrow transplants are left to individual conscience and all other forms of medical treatment are acceptable.
Source: Jehovah's Witnesses official Web site, various experts.