Gag worthy

baltar447

Taken from a closed JW facebook group:

"The KINGDOM HALL is my university, JEHOVAH is my professor, JESUS is my instructor, THE HOLY SPIRIT is my protector, the ANGELS are my support system, The WORLDWIDE BROTHERHOOD are my class mates, the BIBLE is my text book, TRIALS & TEMPTATIONS are my exams, FINDING LOST SHEEP is my assignment, PRAYER is my attendance, LIFE IN PARADISE is my future degree, and DOING JEHOVAH'S WILL is my motto. Enroll today!!! There is room for all. Tuition is FREE!!"

OMFG!

N.drew

If it was the truth it would be cute.

But unfortunately the truth is:

The Kingdom Hall is my ASSIGNMENT

Jehovah is my IDOL

Jesus is GONE

The Holy Spirit WE IGNORE

WE DON'T CARE ABOUT the angels

The worldwide brotherhood IS A SHAM

The Watchtower Magazine is our BIBLE

WE MAKE OUR OWN trials and tribulations.

Finding lost sheep WE COULDN'T REALLY CARE LESS.

Prayer is A LANGUAGE WE DON'T UNDERSTAND

Life in Paradise BEFORE ALL OTHER THINGS.

Motto? COME GREAT TRIBULATION, COME!

GLTirebiter

(finishing up for N.drew)

There was only room for 144,000 and ALL THE SPOTS ARE TAKEN, and no matter how much tuiton you pay YOU STILL AREN'T GIVING ENOUGH!

mrsjones5

Jesus who?

designs

I learned so much from the Awake

Band on the Run

Indeed, Jesus who? sums it up.

N.drew

Having no evidence of Jesus or Jaheshua (sounds like a sneeze) only proves the scripture true that says "I have not sat with men of untruth and with those who hide what they are I do not come in". Psalm 26:4 http://biblos.com/psalms/26-4.htm

Purza

My first thought when I read that was "well then you must be pretty f*cking dumb."

Purza

poppers

Tuition is FREE!!

Yeah, right.

DesirousOfChange

I learned so much from the Awake

That's because reading the Awake! is equivalent to a 4-year college education.

Just put that on your employment application.

DOC

Gag worthy

Share this