Do You Believe It Is Wrong To "Discipline" Your Child In A Physical Way?

by minimus 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • PSacramento
    PSacramento
    Not sure what you mean but there is no need to use violence to teach a child any lessons. Its just an excuse for lazy parenting.

    So you think that a child learning that violence CAN be the result of one of their actions is NOT a lesson that needs to be learned?

    The whole "your mouth writing a cheque that your body can't cash" thing.

    I bounced for a few years, at some local night clubs and a couple of "adult entertainment" establishments and I saw first hand that some people were NOT aware that violence couldbe the result of their "inappropriate behaviour".

    I always remember this one kid that said ( after he got banged up a bit for being an ass with one of the server girls), "you don't have the right to touch me, even my parents don't hit me".

  • tec
    tec

    I do believe that physical discipline (smacking, spanking, shaking, grabbing... anything done like that, especially in anger) is wrong. The look in their eyes the very first time it happens (after you have taught them that violence, smacking, whatever is wrong) is the look of utter betrayal.

    A child then has to sort out when it is okay to be violent... not if it is okay. Children learn to smack from being smacked. Or seeing it. (biting is different though... I'm not sure about the psychology behind children biting. I know its a frustration thing, at least to start)

    Now there are times when I understand it... such as a child running into the street and a mom or dad, heart in throat, rushes out and grabs them, shakes them, perhaps even smacks them, and also hugs them to death. I still don't think its right (though it might well work to stop that kid from ever doing that again!). But I think it is the emotion behind the reaction from the parent (you scared the hell out of me, and I just lost ten years off my life), more than the physical discipline, that speaks to the kid. Understanding doesn't make it right, and at least if you know that, then you can tell your kid... you know, I wish I hadn't hit you (or whatever), or screamed at you... but I was so afraid that I was going to lose you. Parents can make mistakes too.

    Peace,

    Tammy

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

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