How could I have believed it all? - response

by Lady Lee 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • ISP
    ISP

    The internet has to be the curse of the WTS. One slip and before you know it ...it is blasted all round the planet!

    ISP

  • AlanF
    AlanF

    That's right, ISP, but it's far more than mere slips that get exposed. A lot of the Society's semi-secret internal dealings are exposed to the harsh light of public examination.

    Several years ago the semi-secret elders' manual Pay Attention to All the Flock appeared on the Net, and is now available on many websites.

    Over the years certain changes in WTS doctrine or policy were announced on the Net days or weeks in advance of the official WTS announcement, which embarassed the Society no end.

    Several weeks ago the entire recorded text of the recent Kingdom Ministry School for elders appeared on the Net. This shows the internal discontent displayed by some elders.

    Several weeks ago some private correspondence between an elder and the Society on the blood doctrine appeared on the Net. This was valuable in that it showed how much disrespect the Society has even for sincere elders, and how sterile their arguments are.

    From time to time letters to Bodies of Elders appear on the Net, and if Kent Steinhaug gets his way a lot will appear. These letters show how duplicitous and underhanded the Society can be, telling the public one thing and telling elders to do something else.

    Stories from people who were abused by Watchtower shenanigans regularly appear on the Net. I have no doubt that after the NBC Dateline program appears, there will be a huge groundswell of reaction and such abuse stories will appear en masse.

    Indeed, the Net is forcing the Watchtower Society into doing the right thing for once, but not without much protest.

    AlanF

  • jst2laws
    jst2laws

    AlanF,

    Quote: "Over the years certain changes in WTS doctrine or policy were announced on the Net days or weeks in advance of the official WTS announcement, which embarassed the Society no end."

    Because of the internet we are the most informed JW/XJW's in the world. I am constantly gaurded in my contact with Witnesses not just for what I might say that is contrary, but because of what I know that I'm not supposed to know. For months now I have had to act dumb as "elder" friends convey points they learned at KM school. I had the whole thing before they even went. During the last year and and a half I raised suspicion too often by calling the secretary to see if we had received 'such and such' letter yet. To this day more XJW's then Jw's know that taking blood is no long an official disfellowshipping' offense. Even some Elders do not yet understand the changes.

    Yes we are well informed now. It must be scary for the GB. If only we could find inoffensive ways to get more loyal Jdubs to look.

    Jst2laws

  • AlanF
    AlanF

    Good points, jst2laws. Actually we're so well informed that even Bethelites are sometimes suprised by information conveyed to them, sometimes even before they've heard it on the inside.

    Alan

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    I can just imagine the gb running around trying to figure out who is leaking all the info.

    When I started my recovery I learned that information is power. As they continue to lose power over information they too will lose power over their members.

    Sadly most will still believe that the problem is outside the borg rather than the problem being with the wolves who govern within

    Rejoice in the healing and not in the pain.
    Rejoice in the challenge overcome and not in the past hurts.
    Rejoice in the present - full of love and joy.
    Rejoice in the future for it is filled with new horizons yet to be explored. - Lee Marsh 2002

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    I have noticed this comment on the board lately quite a few times so thought I would bttt for those who might need it

  • Odrade
    Odrade

    Thank you Lee for bringing this to the top again. I think it is natural to blame ourselves. After all, we will never get the real problem (WT) to admit their guilt, so we look around for someone else to help us bear the burden of getting suckered into it. But there's no one to blame but ourselves, whether we deserve it or not. It's so hard to get to that point where we can say "It is what it is, and at that time in my life, there was nothing I could do. There was a reason I got taken in, and IT WAS NOT MY FAULT."

    It seems we go from one extreme to another in our culture. Either we duck responsibility for anything, or we shoulder the burden of all blame. How much better when we learn to let it go and quit berating ourselves for our vulnerability. This post struck a real chord with me LadyLee, and there is something deep inside I am trying to get out with my words here, but it's not coming. It's stuck, somewhere in my back I think, which is really apropos. Where else would I carry a burden? Maybe by bringing my thoughts to it, I can ferret out what I want to say and that burden will be lightened...

    Odrade

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Odrade

    A couple of things came to mind while I was reading your post

    WT responsibility. The WTS spent years telling us that if we weren't happy little JWs then the fault was us. We weren't praying enough or going to enought meetings or not preparing for them properly or not going on service enough. And then there is always we jumped ahead or misunderstood. It was so hard for me to get to the point where I could even beging to believe that the problem wasn't me and my pathetic mind and heart condition.

    Blaming the WTS was akin to blaming God himself and that was the unthinkable. So there we were feeling like something was wrong but unable to put our finger on it. They taught us well. And it takes time to undo all that mind control.

    need for justice I think as humans with a certain value system we have an innate need for justice. And as far as the WTS not too many people get any sort of justice. Even those who have gone to court against the WTS have come away with a battered feeling of justice. With no one else to hold responsible we wind up blaming ourselves.

    I think it certainly doesn't help that society in general have this idea that the victim is to blame for being in the situation in the first place or tolerating it as long as they did (i.e abused wives). It takes time to learn the dynamics of abuse and the impact it has on the victim.

    Learning all that can move us towards being survivors. At least here we can openly recognize the responsibility the WTS has for its unethical treatment of people and how its policies scar people for greatly.

  • Odrade
    Odrade

    I've been reading and talking to a therapist about solving the problems of the past in the present. How my past shapes the way I respond to things now. And I've found that my need to blame myself is rooted in a need to NOT forgive myself. I know that sounds odd, but if I forgive myself for being suckered, then I have to forgive my parents for being suckered too. And I'm not ready to forgive them. It's much easier to blame somedays, than to face that little lump of cold, hard anger that I have against them. And it's easier to be angry at them than it is to place the blame squarely where it belongs--- the methods of the WTBTS.

    Intellectually, I know that's where it goes, but how do you get satisfaction out of a corporate monolith? It's a long hard road to mental peace.

    O

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Odrade

    how do you get satisfaction out of a corporate monolith? It's a long hard road to mental peace.

    I don't know if getting satisfaction from them is possible. I highly doubt they will ever accept responsibility.

    But that doesn't have to stop us from placing the blame where it goes. On some level the people at the top who are raking it in ( the money) and creating all these new legal corporations to hide the money and using all the lawyers to find the legal loopholes - they know what they are doing. I may never meet them or never take them to court or even write to them with the slim hope that I would get a response but I know in my gut they know what they are doing and they don't care that people are getting hurt.

    I used to hear people say and said it myself about my mother that "She did the best she could and I love she loved me the best way she knew how." That was such a crock. Yes she knew enough to not do some things. But there was many things she did and she knew how much it hurt. It was her choice to make those decisions. And now I don't excuse her by saying she did the best she could. She knew what she was doing in some things was wrong which is why she hid it.

    And I think that is the key. If someone really doesn't know something is wrong they don't hide it. They do it in the open and are surprised when someone addresses it. Well the WTS has been told what they are doing is wrong - morally and legally and they choose to pretend they are right and schoose to hide behing a lot of double talk and legal loopholes

    If it looks guilty and talks guilty and acts guilty then....

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