Sorry I missed you this time Darren . . . hope you get a good sleep. Come back soon OK?
Moving will have brought some extra pressures on top of everything else . . . things will come right by the time you're working.
Sorry about this absolutley CRAZY insight to my mind.
by dm6 20 Replies latest jw experiences
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dm6
Thanks sizemik. Feeling okay today. been up and active most of the day. hope things are good for you?
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NewChapter
Darren, you sound depressed. If the meds you take for the nasal problem are what I think they, I believe they also have depression as a side effect. That on top of the other complications in your life, it's quite a blow. Have you reached out for help specifically for depression? I'm not trying to diagnose you, I can't, but I urge you to look into it.
NC
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bsmart
Darren, love the Canon in D..... one of my favorites! Hope you are feeling better, if not the the the others are right, see a professional and let them know you need help. If it's allergies I understand, this time of year is the worst for me. Take care
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mickeyman1
Dear Darren
Dont use that medications please they are real shits. In long term tey can kill you.
I know a great man who worked on many clinics and has really huge knowledge of biocemistry and med i have ever seen.
Try this link and you can consult him about your health issues for free.
Ask Brian here on healthyfixx forum or here ask Causticsymmetry on Immortal Hair forum They are the same person.
hope this helps
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discreetslave
I can totally understand where you are coming from. Unhappiness and suicidal tendencies were constant companions for the past 3 years. I know about inflicting pain on oneself just to feel anything other than the misery. It is a vicious and unrelenting cycle. Even when one manages to have a moment of light in the darkness one can make oneself feel guilty about it. "Why can''t I always feel this way?" or "I feel good what's going to happen next to make this go away?"
DM6 you are not alone in your feelings. The words "this too shall pass" can be true for you. Key is not losing hope. Everyone's journey to healing is an individual path. There is no one right way you just find what works for you.
I will say that starting with ones own self worth seems to be a common starting point. I know you worry about your bro but it is difficult to be a support for someone when you can't even hold yourself up. The instructions on an airplane to put the mask on yourself first in case of emergency then help others is true in life.
You did a good thing in expressing your feelings. In my case that is a huge help. Keep a journal(somthings can only be expressed in private), blog, post, draw, paint, sing, play an instrument, find anyway to get your feelings out. Another person to act as a sounding board is good also. You mentioned relationships are tough so that can be hard but so worth it in the end. Just start with one person.
Meds is a toss up. Many of us need them some temporarily & others permanantly. There is no shame diabetics are dependant on medicine to live. Same difference. In my case meds didn't work. I'm better off without them but that's me.
The following may not matter to you because your clouded in low self worth. I'm not just saying this nor am I flirting (married lady) but your pic reveals a cutie. I have a large screen and I looked up close you look good to me. I prefer Clark Kent to Superman that's me. Until the inside is healed you will view the outside from a skewed perspective.
I hope this was of help and I offer my friendship.
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ziddina
Man, I am so sorry to hear about all of your troubles!!
I wish I could say something that would help. Sounds like the health issues are a major problem; if you felt healthy, you'd be in a much better situation.
First thing I'd do, if I were in your shoes, is research your worst health issues and see if there's some other way of dealing with the nasal polyps. Reminds me of a health issue I had as a kid - not life-threatening like yours could be, but embarrassing and somewhat painful - I had warts, warts, WARTS - big, nasty ones on my fingers and my feet!!
My mother dragged me to dermatologists who froze them, burned them, cut them out, gave me medications - one even had me re-innoculated for smallpox because they were going to use some variation of smallpox to attempt to "kick-start" my body's defense mechanism against the warts...
Finally, after dealing with them for about 15 years, THEY WENT AWAY BY THEMSELVES. Of course, by that time, I'd begun eating a HEALTHY diet - not the TV dinners and sugary breakfast rolls that my parents ate... I had ALSO had asthma, but I got RID OF IT by bicycling in cold, wet weather - the sort that my nagging, shrieking JW mother used to scare me about - "Oh, you'll have an ASTHMA attack!"
I ignored her when I was 16 - went for a REALLY long bike ride. Rode till my bronchial tube tried to snap shut - I willed it to stay open enough to continue breathing, and kept riding. Rode until it felt raw, like hamburger. Rode until I couldn't feel ANYTHING in my throat again.
AT that point, I rode home. I had accomplished what I wanted to do - I had actually scarred my bronchial tubes so they weren't as sensitive to cold air/pet dandruff/whatever supposedly caused my "asthma" attacks.
Later on, after I'd cleaned up my diet - got rid of refined sugars, refined flours, corn, refined rices, and potatoes - it turned out that I was physically allergic to refined sugar, and THAT was what had caused my asthma!! Well, the refined sugar in my parents' crappy diet, that is...
Hope this helps... Venting sure can help; feel free to vent as needed. It's hard to eat a healthy diet if you're feeling sick and don't have the income to buy decent food!!
I sure hope things change for the better for you - and soon! Zid
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sizemik
Feeling okay today. been up and active most of the day. hope things are good for you?
Thanks for the kind wish . . .
Mate . . . the way you have been feeling is quite understandable. All you've been through lately, and even before that . . . is one hell of a bumpy ride. What you've proved however, is that you are a survivor. Someone who can reach down to his bootstraps and haul himself back up again. I know that takes some doing. What appears a huge effort to us can seem minor to others . . . but it isn't . . . it's a major. You need to recognise that, because that makes you one hell of a human being . . . just that alone.
It's so easy to develop a negative view of ourselves. But I can see already that the inner person is one of high value in your case. Any feelings that are negative are therefore not valid. Depression . . . especially when it's accompanied by stressful times and uncertainty, buggers up our thinking a bit . . . especially our view of ourselves (been there). Be assured . . . these are not just soothing words . . . you are a good and valuable person. Everyone that's posted here can see that . . . that's why they've posted.
Give yourself time dude . . . make what progress you can in a measured way . . . and expect the occasional setback . . . you'll find that happiness.
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Pams girl
Hi Darren x
I can relate to the cutting. Havent done it in ages now, but the urge is there, underneath. If that urge surfaces, I find squeezing a ball good, or going for a kick about with a football with my boy...helps get rid of the adrenaline.Playing loud music and having a good old scream/sing is good too. I know what you mean about cutting to FEEL something...its a physical representaion of the turmoil and pain inside us. But you can stop it, if you want. Coming here and VENTING is great, please keep it up!
I was on valium for several years due to agoraphobia and severe panic attacks. They made me feel slightly dopey but didnt cure me. They only mask the problem. You can do without them but need to have a reducing dose organised by your doctor. You CAN be without them. Maybe anti-depressants would be the way to go for you? The SSRIs (Selective Seratonin Re-uptake Inhibitors) would be particularly suitable for you I think as they will produce calm feelings without doping you up.
Ok, your not perfect (who is) but you are unique, and valuable. I hope that once circumstances settle for you, you will feel better about yourself. Thanks for sharing your story. Keep posting x
Ps...if I was single and 15 years younger......haha. Youre a good looking lad. You just havent met anyone who deserves you yet. You will, one day x
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Ding
Tralfamadorian,
Sorry to hear about your battles as well.
I don't want your comments to get lost in the shuffle.
Thanks for being open enough to share your troubles with us.
We are here for you as well.
Let us know whatever we can do to help you through all this.