I can remember when i was first assimilated, the JW's did alot together, they went to the park together, they had picnics, days out together.
Somehow by the 90's this had stopped.
Did i miss somthing? what happened?
When and how did the GB start cracking down on the dubs social life?
by highdose 44 Replies latest jw friends
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cantleave
I don't think it was ever a policy. When I was an elder we tried to arrange social activities, but it proved hard because everyone was too busy / too lazy to arrange things. In the end picnics were arranged after Bank holiday field service, but these were poorly attended because noone went on FS!!!
Of course the the social elite had many parties and get-togethers, but they were rarely inclusive of everyone in the congo.
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wobble
Hi Highdose !
We used to have HUGE congo. parties ,barbecues attended by half the circuit !! , outings, we hired a coach ! etc. etc.
Our Congo. was known far and wide as sociable, (you probably came along on some of the jamborees ?)
We had a warm family atmosphere, more often than not only getting closer to people because of this social aspect.
This did tail off with all the "large gatherings" counsel, and as the congo. got larger,170 plus pubs. before it split, it got a bit less "warm".
Within the F.S group it still continued, till they did away with that.
The W.T is all about control, they want even local Elders to regulate Witness lives as much as possible, they seem to hate any element of fun in JW life. Any kind of Networking is condemned it seems.
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highdose
yes wobble, yours were the party kings of the circuit. right up until certain pillars of the cong starting getting young sisters pregnant!
( wobble knows who i mean, and its not him!)
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wobble
No, I was a pillock of the congregation !
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Alfred
Highdose... Thanks for posting this thread... I thought I was the only one who noticed this...
During the 80's, I remember when the entire congo used to have at least one big summer outing per year. In fact, I remember when the date and location of this "field day" was announced in the Service Meeting... everyone became giddy with excitement afterwards and the elders even made arrangements to rent a bus for the older brothers who couldn't drive very far. The bus would depart from the Kingdom Hall at 7AM on a Saturday... oops! there goes one day of Field service down the drain!
Then, just as you mentioned, the 90's came and all this suddenly stopped.
But I have a pretty good idea of why these outings suddenly ceased in my KH... During these "field days", I noticed that everyone felt a lot more at ease, especially after having a couple of beers, and this created an environment where everyone would speak more freely about things that bothered them... particularly certain bizarre JW beliefs and doctrines. Invariably, the subject of 1975 managed to make it into the conversation. Well, eventually the elders received a letter from Brooklyn in which the Service Department "suggested" to our elders to seriously reconsider having anymore field days in the future since this appears to be creating an environment whereby Satan could easily introduce apostacy into the congregation... I got this from an MS who got it from his elder father and both were highly upset with this "suggestion" from Brooklyn. The letter also said something about some brothers never showing up for Field Service but were always present for Field Day. And so that was the end of our only "fun" day of the year...
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Broken Promises
I remember in the early 80s we had a good social group going in the cong I was in. But by the late 80s things started to get stricter and it was harder to organise anything.
In the 90s you could try to organise something but the elders would inevitably stick their nose into the organising - who was invited, who was in charge, etc etc. Sometimes you'd try to get around that by inviting them but then they'd want everything organised their way. In the end, you basically had to organise small groups and be secretive about it so the elders wouldn't interfere. Ridiculous when you're talking about grown adults, not little children.
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wobble
You are not allowed to be a grown adult in the W.T.
"Mother" is always watching you, and will tell you what to do, and what not to do, and what to think and feel .
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TotallyADD
The WT cult hates large groups of R&F having a social gathering. Only large groups they want if a KH, CA and DC. Last hall we were at many felt getting together was a sin. I remember a letter to the body of elders on the problems of large gatherings and the big question "what is a large group?" we ask the CO about what number to put on it and he said between 40 to 60 people. Also if there is a large gathering one or two elders have to be the watch dogs and make sure no one is doing something bad. Most elders hated that job and I think that is one of the reason the good old days of the friends having a social life is over. Totally ADD
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blondie
In the late 70's the WTS started tightening up (when I was an older teenager). It was accelerated more as a result of the Great Apostasy starting with the Ray Franz/Dunlap/Sanchez thing at Bethel. Supposedly they were getting together in informal bible study groups at Bethel.
At that time official directives written and verbal that the size of groups had to be monitored, who was at these events, what they did (costume parties, for example). The WTS then has used the Wash and Repeat policy since then.
*** km 8/81 pp. 1-2 par. 4 Things of Serious Concern ***Good association is also a matter of serious concern. After mentioning those he found to be good association, Paul said: "Only these are my fellow workers for the kingdom of God, and these very ones have become a strengthening aid to me." (Col. 4:11) Surely Paul did not have in mind being with these fellow workers in large, late evening parties where partaking of food and drink immoderately would be easy and supervision difficult. Getting together with a few others, possibly in the home with family members present, usually produces superior results in upbuilding discussions and interchanges of encouragement. In such an atmosphere, wholesome conversation and experiences replace loud, distasteful music. Children can be included and Christian personalities molded. This can contribute to effective and zealous field service the next morning, whereas late partying in large groups usually discourages it.
*** km 9/95 p. 2 pars. 2-5 Do All Things for God’s Glory ***
Organized Social Affairs: Whether we are "eating or drinking or doing anything else," we should "do all things for God’s glory." (1 Cor. 10:31-33) This counsel is not observed by some, and problems continue to develop because of social gatherings too large to be properly supervised. In some instances, hundreds of people are invited to elaborate functions where worldly entertainment is featured. Sometimes those attending are asked to pay admission or other fees. Such gatherings closely resemble worldly affairs, the spirit of which is out of harmony with decency and Bible principles.—Rom. 13:13, 14; Eph. 5:15-20.
3 It has been reported that large numbers of Witnesses have gathered at rented facilities where the entertainment is unwholesome and worldly and where proper supervision is lacking. Similar activities advertised as a "Jehovah’s Witness" weekend have been held at hotels or resorts. Because of the difficulty in properly supervising such large groups, problems have developed. Rowdiness, overindulgence in alcoholic beverages, and even immorality have sometimes resulted. (Eph. 5:3, 4) Social gatherings where such conduct occurs do not honor Jehovah. Rather, they bring reproach upon the good name of the congregation and stumble others.—1 Cor. 10:23, 24, 29.
4 Christians are encouraged to show hospitality, but the emphasis should be focused on the spiritual interchange. (Rom. 1:11, 12) Small get-togethers are usually best. The Our Ministry book says on pages 135-6: "At times, several families may be invited to a home for Christian fellowship. . . . Reasonably, those who are hosts in such cases should feel personally responsible for what takes place. With this in mind, discerning Christians have seen the wisdom of limiting the size of such groups and the duration of the gatherings." Jesus indicated that nothing elaborate is needed when our goal is to encourage our friends spiritually.—Luke 10:40-42.
5 It is a fine thing to show hospitality to fellow Christians. However, there is a big difference between a modest gathering in our home and an elaborate affair reflecting a worldly spirit in a rented facility. When you invite others to be your guests, you should be sure that you can assume full responsibility for what takes place.—See The Watchtower of August 15, 1992, pages 17-20.
*** w04 10/15 p. 23 Youths—Let Your Parents Help You Guard Your Heart! ***Like Caroline’s mother, your parents may feel obligated to warn you about peer pressure or even to restrict certain activities or friendships. Nathan remembers several clashes with his parents on such issues. "My friends often invited me to go out with them," he explains, "but my parents didn’t want me to hang around in large groups or go to large unsupervised parties. At the time, I couldn’t understand why other parents were more permissive than mine."
*** w99 9/1 pp. 15-16 pars. 8-10 Youths—Train Your Perceptive Powers! ***
8 Well, use your perceptive powers. First, get the facts. How large will this gathering be? Who will be there? When will it begin? When will it end? What activities are planned? How will it be supervised? Next, do some research, looking up "Social Gatherings," and "Entertainment" in the Watch Tower Publications Index. What might your research reveal? For one thing, that Jehovah does not condemn getting together to have a good time. In fact, Ecclesiastes 8:15 says that along with working hard, "mankind have nothing better under the sun than to eat and drink and rejoice." Why, Jesus Christ himself attended special meals and at least one wedding. (Luke 5:27-29; John 2:1-10) Kept in balance, socializing can be beneficial.
9 Nevertheless, badly organized gatherings may spell trouble. At 1 Corinthians 10:8, we read of how unwise associations led to fornication and the execution of "twenty-three thousand [unfaithful Israelites] in one day." Another sobering warning is found at Romans 13:13: "As in the daytime let us walk decently, not in revelries and drunken bouts, not in illicit intercourse and loose conduct, not in strife and jealousy." (Compare 1 Peter 4:3.) True, no fixed number can be set for how many can attend a gathering. But experience shows that the larger a gathering is, the harder it is to supervise it. Smaller, well-managed gatherings are less likely to turn into "wild parties."—Galatians 5:21, Byington.
10 Your research will no doubt spark further questions, such as: Will some mature adult Christians be at the gathering? Indeed, who is sponsoring it? Is the purpose of the gathering to promote wholesome association or to make a profit for someone? Are there any restrictions as to who can attend? If the gathering is during the weekend, will it end at a reasonable time so that those attending can share in the Christian ministry the next day? If there is to be music and dancing, will it be consistent with Christian standards? (2 Corinthians 6:3) Asking such questions may not be easy. But Proverbs 22:3 warns: "Shrewd is the one that has seen the calamity and proceeds to conceal himself, but the inexperienced have passed along and must suffer the penalty." Yes, you can avoid risky situations by using your perceptive powers.
*** w98 10/15 p. 30 Questions From Readers ***It thus would not be strange that a couple might on their wedding anniversary take time to reflect on the joyfulness of that event and on their resolve to work for success as a couple. Whether they focus on this happy occasion in private, just as a couple, or they have a few relatives or close friends with them would be for them to decide. The occasion should not become a mere excuse for a large social gathering. On this occasion Christians would want to be guided by the principles that apply every day of their lives. So whether one takes note of a wedding anniversary or not is a personal matter.—Romans 13:13, 14.
*** w97 4/15 p. 24 Weddings That Honor Jehovah ***A reception is not a requirement for a successful wedding, but there is no Scriptural objection to such a happy occasion. However, such a gathering for true Christians should be different from worldly receptions marked by extravagance, heavy drinking, overeating, wild music, suggestive dancing, and even fights. The Bible categorizes "revelries" with the works of the flesh. (Galatians 5:21) It is easier to have proper control when it is not a very large gathering. There is no need to erect a tent to satisfy popular customs. Should some decide to use a tent for reasons of space or weather, this is a personal matter.
Experience has shown that a good way to limit the number of guests is by using specific invitations in writing. It is wiser to invite individuals instead of whole congregations, and as orderly Christians, we should respect such limitations. Written invitations also help us to avoid the embarrassment of having a disfellowshipped person show up at the reception, for if that happened, many brothers and sisters might choose to leave. (1 Corinthians 5:9-11) If a couple invite unbelieving relatives or acquaintances, these will no doubt be limited in number, giving more importance to those "related to us in the faith." (Galatians 6:10) Some have chosen to invite worldly acquaintances or unbelieving relatives to the wedding talk rather than to the reception. Why? Well, there have been cases when worldly relatives created such an embarrassing situation at a wedding reception that many brothers and sisters felt that they could not remain. Some couples have arranged to have only a small dinner with close family members and Christian friends.
*** w92 8/15 pp. 16-17 par. 7 Social Entertainment—Enjoy the Benefits, Avoid the Snares ***
7 Ecclesiastes 10:19 speaks favorably of ‘bread for the laughter of workers and wine that makes life rejoice.’ That does not sound as if entertainment were inherently wrong or bad, does it? Yet, the same book says: "For everything there is an appointed time, . . . a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to wail and a time to skip about." (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4) Yes, while not condemning appropriate entertainment, the Bible offers us cautions. These include counsel to keep social entertainment in its place as to time and quantity. It also warns us about pitfalls that have been all too common with large social gatherings.—2 Timothy 3:4.
*** w92 8/15 p. 18 par. 14 Social Entertainment—Enjoy the Benefits, Avoid the Snares ***Accordingly, some Christian hosts have decided to provide wine, beer, and other alcoholic drinks only if they can personally oversee what their guests are served or consume. If a group is larger than the host can directly oversee, such as the Jewish weddings mentioned, alcohol in quantity can be a dangerous snare. A person might be present who fought and overcame a problem with drinking. You can appreciate that general, unregulated access to alcohol could tempt him to overindulge and ruin the occasion for all. An overseer and father in Germany commented that his family benefits from pleasant association at social gatherings with fellow believers. He added, though, that the potential for problems was definitely greater when beer was easily available.
*** w92 8/15 p. 19 par. 16 Social Entertainment—Enjoy the Benefits, Avoid the Snares ***The Canada branch of the Watch Tower Society writes: "Counsel relative to limiting the size of social gatherings has been understood by a few elders to mean that large gatherings at wedding receptions are in violation of the counsel. They have concluded that if we are counseled to keep our social gatherings to a small, manageable size, it would be wrong to have 200 or 300 people at a wedding reception."Rather than overemphasizing an arbitrary size, prime attention should be given to proper oversight, however many will be there. The quantity of wine that Jesus provided indicates that quite a sizable group attended the wedding in Cana, but evidently it was suitably overseen. Other feasts back then were not; their size may have been a factor leading to inadequate oversight. The larger a gathering, the greater the challenge, because it is easier for weaker ones, who are inclined toward excesses, to assert themselves. At unsupervised gatherings they may promote questionable activities.
Fine oversight of a social gathering includes its planning and preparation. This does not require devising a catchy theme to make it unique or memorable but which would imitate worldly parties, such as costume balls or masquerade parties. Can you imagine faithful Israelites in the Promised Land planning a party where all were to dress like pagans in Egypt or another land? Would they plan sensuous dancing or wild music that might be the rage among pagans? Back at Mount Sinai, they did get ensnared in music and dancing such as may have been current and popular in Egypt. We know how God and his mature servant Moses viewed that entertainment. (Exodus 32:5, 6, 17-19) Hence, the host or overseer of a social event should consider whether there will be any singing or dancing; and if so, he should be sure that it is consistent with Christian principles.—2 Corinthians 6:3.
Finally, we remember that ‘Jesus and his disciples were invited to the marriage feast.’ (John 2:2) Granted, an individual Christian or a family might simply visit others for a pleasant, upbuilding time. But for planned social events, experience shows that determining beforehand who will be there helps to prevent problems. The importance of this was stressed by an elder in Tennessee, U.S.A., who has reared sons and daughters who are in the full-time ministry. Before he or his wife would accept an invitation, or give his children permission to attend, he contacted the host to be sure that the attendees were predetermined. His family was protected from snares that have befallen some at gatherings open to all, whether for a meal, a picnic, or exercise, such as playing ball.
Jesus discouraged inviting to a gathering just relatives, old friends, or ones of similar age or economic situation. (Luke 14:12-14; compare Job 31:16-19; Acts 20:7-9.) If you carefully choose whom to invite, it is easier to include Christians with a variety of different ages and circumstances. (Romans 12:13; Hebrews 13:2) A few of them might be spiritually weak or new ones who can benefit from association with mature Christians.—Proverbs 27:17.*** w77 9/1 pp. 524-525 par. 18 ‘See Good for Your Hard Work’ ***At any time that God’s servants enjoy companionship with one another, they should keep in mind the Bible’s admonition: "Whether you are eating or drinking or doing anything else, do all things for God’s glory." (1 Cor. 10:31) We can ask ourselves the question, Is the occasion really bringing praise to Jehovah God? Usually upbuilding association can be enjoyed by all when social get-togethers are kept to a reasonable size, when care is exercised regarding who is invited and the Christian host conscientiously assumes full responsibility for what takes place. If, for example, a whole congregation enjoys a picnic together, elders would certainly want to use their influence for good. Of course, when social gatherings draw people indiscriminately from beyond the congregation, it is difficult, if not impossible, for elders to exercise healthful control of the group. Any who arrange for a social gathering should therefore keep this in mind and avoid circumstances that lend themselves to a lack of proper control and direction.
*** g86 11/8 p. 12 How Can I Have a Good Time? ***From time to time, though, it is also enjoyable to get together with friends. Why not ask your parents to help you plan such a gathering? You can arrange for a variety of activities, such as board games and group singing. If some of your friends have musical talents, perhaps they can be coaxed into performing a bit. Good food also adds to an occasion, but it does not have to be fancy or expensive. Sometimes guests can bring different food items.
Is there a park or an outdoor area nearby that allows for activities such as swimming and ball games? Why not have an occasional picnic? Again, families can share in bringing food so that no one is burdened financially.
Moderation is the key. Music does not need to be at ear-splitting levels to be enjoyed; nor does dancing have to be vulgar or sensual to be fun. Then there is the problem of games getting too competitive. Reports one Christian parent: "Some youths at times argue, almost to the point of fighting." Follow the Bible’s advice to avoid ‘competing with one another.’—Galatians 5:26.
Whom should you invite? The Bible says, "Have love for the whole association of brothers." (1 Peter 2:17) Why, then, limit your gatherings to peers? "Widen out" in your associations. (2 Corinthians 6:13) One parent observed: "The elderly, though often not able to participate in some of the activities, enjoy coming and watching the goings-on." The presence of adults often helps prevent things from getting out of hand. It is not possible, though, to invite "the whole association" to any one gathering. And problems can develop when gatherings are large and uncontrollable. Keep your gatherings small and avoid difficulties.
Christian gatherings also present the opportunity to build one another up spiritually. True, some youths feel that adding spirituality to a gathering takes the fun out of it. "When we have a gathering," bemoaned one Christian boy, "it’s, ‘Sit down, get your Bible out, and play Bible games.’" However, the psalmist said: "Happy is the man . . . [whose] delight is in the law of Jehovah." (Psalm 1:1, 2) Therefore, discussions—or even games—that center around the Bible can add to the enjoyment of the occasion.
Another idea is to have several relate how they became Christians. Or add a dose of warmth and laughter by inviting some to tell humorous anecdotes. Often these teach valuable lessons.