Sticky Situation - What to do?

by I<3MYGod 54 Replies latest jw experiences

  • I<3MYGod
    I<3MYGod

    I have posted about my experience with the cult....So now I find myself in a difficult position. I have left it alone for many years but I wonder what you guys think.

    I faded away from the cult and stopped going for quite a while. My older sister took it upon herself to meet with my family and discuss all my sins and actions (they were active). My mother and her take it to the elders, long story short - I'm DF'ed. Now my sister that was so holier than thou is no longer going to meetings...doing drugs...sleeping around (her husband doesn't mind)...They are still technically jay dubs. My brother in-law's dad is an elder of high importance. My BIL was a MS. They just stopped going. They still talk with other jay dubs, they have them watch their child so that they can go to concerts and party....yadda yadda yadda

    Do I just leave well enough alone and let them enjoy their debauchery or do I write an anonymous letter?? Part of me would like getting back at her, but then I don't want to do that to her. I'm torn. I don't like the fact that she is lying to them all and getting away with it.

    I'm also curious as to why they haven't gotten a letter and asked for their presence in the back room....

  • VoidEater
    VoidEater

    Why do you care what the JWs think or do? Approve of or disapprove of? Does the WTS have that much hold over you?

    If you have issues with how your family is treating you as opposed to have they treat your sister, take that up with them - ask them why they treat you poorly when they hold her in esteem.

  • Gayle
    Gayle

    The issue is between your sister and you only. Do you want to gain your sister? Do you want to have a heart to heart talk with her about how you feel? Are you concerned about her 'drugs' life style she is choosing? To do anything in spite, will not be doing any good. If you have love for her maybe just a good heart to heart talk would be valuable.

  • Found Sheep
    Found Sheep

    Ya i agree if your goal is to gain your sister have a heart to heart. After what she did to you it may make her wake up

  • I<3MYGod
    I<3MYGod

    I guess it's not so much what the jay dubs think...it's about not living a lie. Which I have never done, I see no point in it at all. I am open and honest with my family. I guess it annoys me that she was sooooo ready and willing to see me disciplined and suffer when I decided to fade away and do my own thing.

    Immediate family treat us no differently - my mom still talks to us all (she is active, my dad not so much). My distant family (aunts, uncles, grandparents have nothing to do with any of us black sheep)

    I guess it could be some hurt and betrayal that still irks me and perhaps I want some payback. Hmmm...

  • Think About It
    Think About It
    Do I just leave well enough alone and let them enjoy their debauchery or do I write an anonymous letter?? Part of me would like getting back at her, but then I don't want to do that to her. I'm torn. I don't like the fact that she is lying to them all and getting away with it.

    You didn't like it when it was done to you, so just leave it alone. Do not stoop to being like a JW snitch. That would be like playing by WTS rules.

    Think About It

  • I<3MYGod
    I<3MYGod

    There is no heart to heart with my sister....trust me I have tried.

    It also bothers me that they still use their witness friends for free baby sitting.

    My sister is now pretty much an atheist, but she won't break her bounds to the "truth" because she enjoys what she is able to get from them....

  • watson
    watson

    Let it go...wait...one day she will approach you. Then have a heart to heart. You can take the high road.

  • I<3MYGod
    I<3MYGod

    She rarely talks to me now that I am happy and have a relationship with God. Sad but true.

    Maybe if she has to face what she has done and is doing she will no longer be able to hide in her little corner and pretend that all is well??

  • Butterflyleia85
    Butterflyleia85

    Yelp I would confront your sister that's what I did with mine. But in my sister's situation was she wasn't baptised and did all the bad things I did (I wasn't to good of example anyways so I am no innocent person) but she never got punished and I of course was DFed. I see her with her boyfriend, they get married, and she wants to get baptised so she shuns me. I feel hurt, I keep her little secret then what do I get for my loyalty to my sister, shunned and she is now all holyer then thou. I confront her... It took a while for it to absorb in her brain I think but then I hear from mom that she confessed everything to the elders and her husband. Her husband thought she was a vergin. He left her for two weeks upset but forgave her. They held off baptism for a year. So I guess all is well. I never want her to experiance DFment but I did want her to see how unfair it was for her sins to be unpunished (even if it was just through guilt... guilt I feel is good punishment to ones self).

    She still shuns me but I feel ok with her actions because she feels she is doing it for the good of God... as long as she doesn't be a hypercrite I respect her choices. I feel she is better off with this new spiritual lifestyle then the bad she was living... But I would feel even more happier if she learned what I learned, she could then be her normal self and still a good person she has inside her, but that will probably never happen.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit