Can You Reach Out to an Unbelieving Mate? - KM November 2010

by jgnat 69 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  jgnat

  Just wondering, for other "Unbelieving Mates" who visit this site, how many of you fielded spousal interference this week? For those of you who don't keep up on WT news any more, the November issue of the Kingdom Ministry contained the above titled article, with a few "helpful suggestions". I give credit to my hubby that he respected my stand before and after the meeting, even as he harbored a faint hope that the sainted words of the Kingdom Ministry would reach out and knock me to my "senses".

  In summary, the "suggestions" include patience, don't bring up religious arguments, show through your actions and friendliness that the "unbelieving mate"'s prejudices are unfounded, and if all else fails, get them when facing health problems or other crises.

  The worst I fielded was directly after the meeting, when hubby asked me what it would take to join the Watchtower Society. I told him a frontal lobotomy.

  The charm of my hubby is that I had to explain what a frontal lobotomy was. "Well, there's not much use of getting that done," he replied.
• 

  jgnat

  I also credit hubby with sharing his KM with me so that I could accurately represent the article today. He first resisted, knowing I would be sharing it (mocking it, his words) on an "apostate" site. When I told him I just wanted to share experiences with others, he got the article for me.
• 

  Nickolas

  Thanks, jgnat. I had wondered what just happened. Your post explains it.
• 

  jgnat

  Yes, I used to wonder at the wild fluctuations in attitude and behavior by my hubby after the meetings. I finally caught on that he briefly picks up the flavour of the meeting, then gradually returns to his natural self throughout the week. I started keeping an eye out for articles targetting "unbelievers" (me).

  It has been helpful fading to three a week (the midweek meeting, field service, and Sunday). There are greater gaps between, allowing hubby's natural self to shine.
• 

  wasblind

  Hello there Jgnat,

  nice to here from you , the part of your post that caught my attention was :" and if all else fails, get them when facing health problems or other crises."

  they are in the "get em when their down " mode aren't they.

  Yep that's the WTS get them when they are not thinkin' straight

  Jgnat, was that a direct quote ? or your view, if it's your view I'm

  totally in agreement
• 

  Nickolas

  I questioned that as well.
• 

  jgnat

  In all fairness, here's a direct quote, "An unbeliever who has not been receptive to Bible discussion may listen to Scriptural encouragement when he is in the hospital or encounters serious healh problems. If a divided household experiences a crisis, such as the death of a family member, the elders may invite the unbeliever to sit in when they give comfort to the family."

  Yup, get them when they are down.

  Still wouldn't work on me. I know what I believe and why I believe. It would take a full frontal lobotomy for me not to care where I worship.
• 

  Nickolas

  Now, we wouldn't call that manipulative, would we? That quote gives me the creeps.
• 

  moshe

  I wonder how the elders would befriend the Jewish spouse of a JW ? Would they come over for a Hanukkah party and eat potato latkes? Spin the dreidel and win some chocolate gelt candy coins? Light a candle on the Hanukkah menorah? Its funny to the extreme.
• 

  Nickolas

  Oy, dots zo fonny. You should go out and get a yob telling yokes you funny you.