Has an elder ever made a difference in your life?

by monkeyman 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • monkeyman
    monkeyman

    Ok, I've read a lot of horror stories out there about outrageous shepherding calls so I know they exist. I've also been on several and received 2.

    However, as an elder I thought I was pretty capable at helping people and making a difference in their lives. I've had people tell me so over and over which was quite comforting to me after I was unceremoniously removed.

    So here's my question......Has anyone out there ever been the recipient of the kind of loving care from elders that made a positive difference in your life? Care to share that story?

    I really dont want to believe that they are that few and far between.

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    .Has anyone out there ever been the recipient of the kind of loving care from elders that made a positive difference in your life?

    ..

    ........................OUTLAW

  • yknot
    yknot

    My main kiddie TMS Elder....

    He loved kids like Mr. Rogers!

    I spent my formative years under his guidance.

    Under him I learn to write, read, do math, give talks, give door to door presentations, fill out FS slips, give critiques of talks, spot propaganda, discern interpretation from biblical doctrine, survive Armageddon, how to climb the WTS ladder, which college I should attend, be like the Bereans......he even took time to meet with all the teachers of us kids to make sure they understood the reasons we didn't do holidays and was there immediately if a teacher overstepped legal boundaries.

    While my parents were big on being smart, he took that desire and funnelled it into a productive manner. It was his counsel and shared wisdom that got me through all persecution I would later receive after moving away. He was an extremely balanced and compassionate man.

    When I started reading the experiences of JWN's Gilead Grads, I realized why he used to say I would never 'tolerate' Gilead. He took the time to know each of us individually and encouraged us to be our best.

    He was of greater spiritual influence than anyone else in my life........

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Yes, and he was removed as an elder for failing to form judicial committees when people came to him for help.

  • Lillith26
    Lillith26

    Yes.... but I see now that I was still being "love bombed" by all at the KH at the time, so it's hard to know if his kind words were real or just part of the con? I like to think that he was just sweet old guy- but then again...............

  • oompa
    oompa

    this may be a very short thread i'm afraid................oompa

    curious monkeyman....what kind of differences did you help make in peoples lives?

  • dissed
    dissed

    The only elders who I saw, who changed people's lives, were the ones on the dramas, at the district conventions.

    Its mostly make believe to think someone can come to a pubs home and miraculously save someone.

    "Oh brother shepherding elder, its like having JC visit our home. You are so wonderful!"

    Its a rare elder who positively knows and cares for those under him. I would like to help you, but I can't remember any instances that you want.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    A few elders I have known were kind. A few were 'serious' about 'helping', but that aid was always formatted by the Watchtower Corporation, and generally consisted of 'Pray more, Preach more, Study more, Attend more'.

    I have been accused, lied to, lied about, groomed, dressed down, ignored, treated with contempt - all by elders.

    Helped? In any seriously positive manner? NOPE!

    They are few and far between. After all, they are not trained to HELP. They are enforcers of corporate legalism. They do that pretty well most of the time.

    Jeff

  • dissed
    dissed

    AK Jeff

    I asked a CO for help on doing sheperding calls. He was supposed to be awesome. He even had his experience in the WT.

    His outline was exactly what you said. ugh!

    The family we visited did their part to help. They all got dressed like it was a meeting, with Bibles and note books on the tables. The sister made a cake and coffee. Come to think, it was just like a DC drama...

    The couple told me later they got excited for nothing.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Just one during the time I lived in my abusive home. He gave us attention at the book study, took time to train us in fun ways in fs, bought us treats. Had families over to play basketball and volleyball. I realized when I grew up that he had neglected his own family to do this. But for those of us then in families without jw dads that were not jws, it was a lifeline.

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