What made me take "The Red Pill"?

by God_Delusion 25 Replies latest jw experiences

  • God_Delusion
    God_Delusion

    So what was it? What made me open my eyes after 30 years and smell the coffee? And why did I accept the red pill, but my parents and everyone else is content with the blue pill?

    Has anyone done any research as to what wakes us up?

    I had a chat with my older sister (JW) recently and she was furious at my decision to not go meetings any more. So after her ranting and raving, I asked her if she wanted me to explain why? She let me proceed. So I told her how I felt and that I started to research the WTS and saw that everything told to us was a lie.

    I then backed that up by asking her to explain to me the year 1914. She told me that it signifies Christ's presence, or when Satan was cast down to earth. Fair enough I said, explain to me where the WTS got the date from? She couldn't (I mean, who can?!).

    I found this funny as I only properly looked into it once I decided to stop going to the meetings. Ironic or what?

    So I told her where Russell got the date from. I told her that 607 isn't a real date either. I also explained about the entire 1919 saga.

    Do you know what her response was? "Those are just details! Don't you realise that your going to die at armageddon?"

    She then told me that if I don't change, she won't be able to speak to me any longer (and I'm not even df'd).

    So then, what did we learn from this conversation? She's just as intelligent as I am, if not more so. She's got a great career to and so mingles with with intelligent people.

    So please, if anyone can explain to me what makes her brain react the way it does when listening to facts, please explain it to me. She's not the only one either.

    I had a chat with my best man (also thought he was my best friend) and explained everything to him. He told me he would look into it. I got a call the next day from him telling me that he didn't look into it and after considerable prayer, thought it best to tell me that we wouldn't be friends if I didn't change my thoughts about God, Jesus and the WTS. He also told me that he wouldn't tell the elders anything as they would certainly df me.

    I told him that for the sake of our friendship, wouldn't it be worth listening to me and doing his own research using nothing but the societies literature? He said no and then said he had to go.

    So again I ask you, what made me open my eyes? And just to add some spice to the matter, please note that I was one of those witnesses that would have my own child die rather than have a blood transfusion. I was also out on the ministry on the weekends, and felt disgusted at the thought of me being in the same room as an apostate.

    Answers on a post card please.....

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    The reactions of your sis and best friend are predictable. I was like that, was a jw like you were. Maybe, everything needs to build up to a critical level, before a jw will take an honest look at the evidence. A point where the wieght from all the dissappointments, all the guilt, all the depression, all the bs, etc is great enough to tip a person into a new place where a person becomes ready to just face it as it comes.

    S

  • musky
    musky

    "Answers on a post card please....."

    I am not sure what that means.Keep it short?

    Very interesting post. Your older sister was just in the defensive mode. It does not matter how much proof is presented then.But she will think about what you said, and maybe some of it will slowly make sense.

    What made you open your eyes was probably that you were able to trust your own mind,even if it went against what you have been taught for years. You were able to realize that maybe you were honestly misled for years, and not to proud to admit it.

    I hope that was short enough.

  • Hermano
    Hermano

    Good question. I often wonder about that myself. You mentioned how you were like them, how zealous you were. I was like that too. But I've also always been brutally honest with myself. The kind of honesty that makes you abandon your entire life if you realize you've been wrong about your beliefs. For some people, that's too much to give up, so they rather not risk it by looking into the possibility that it's all a lie.

    Another possiblity: maybe some people are really Ok with that type of life. I don't mean that they don't dislike field service, or they don't experience personality clashes, or just plain @sshole elders/COs/DOs. I mean, that in spite of those things, they are for the most part OK with the life of a JW.

    I was never Ok with it, but didn't realize it until I was in for about 27 years. I kept getting into trouble and thought it was because I was evil. I finally realized I was trying to live someone else's life. A life that didn't fit me, so I always felt uncomfortable in it, even though I tried like hell to make it fit, because I didn't want to die. My siblings on the other hand, never seemed to get into trouble. And they are still in. My wife is still in, and she swears she's happy and likes her life. If they are overall comfortable with their lives, why risk realizing that it's all a lie?

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    There are some people that want truth above anything and are willing to search for it like hidden treasure. They refuse to be blinded by one false promise after another and they finally start paying attention when their bs detector kicks off and they sense that something is just not right. Others, like your sister, would rather have their warm fuzzy illusions. They don't want any other "truth" except the one they are familiar with. They enjoy having their ears tickled and prefer the comfort of familiarity to an honest search for spiritual truths.

  • oompa
    oompa

    i wonder this daily.......i have been a torridly loud apostate for two years now.......told all my friends and fam the truth......some even agree on my main points.....but are willin to........ya WAIT ON JEHOVAH!!!!..............

    i think some are smart enough.....maybe your sis.....to immediatley realize the reprecussions of the red pill........oompa

    btw......they have STILL not dfd me!!!

  • besty
    besty

    God_Delusion - we seem to be brothers from another mother. For your sister substitute my brother. For your best man/best friend substitute my best friend.

    I was also told by my brother (Elder CoBOE) that my marriage would break up if I stopped going to Jehovah's Witness meetings and that my children would die an untimely death. He also said he would be shunning me prior to actively campaigning to get me and my wife disfellowshipped from 400 miles and another country away. His IQ - 151. Successful executive style job. University educated and excelled in his degree course. A further year study would get him a PhD. Go figure.

    My only conclusion as mentioned by other posters is that its a personality thing - some are compelled by the need for honesty and personal integrity to leave no matter the cost, others just don't like the lifestyle. And vice versa. It fits like a glove for some - the security of a high control group with pre-digested thoughts and sub-contracted consciences is nothing to do with IQ and everything to do with institutionalized neediness.

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

    I got the same reaction from my "friends" and "family".

    Have you read Steve Hassan's books? They may help you to understand some of the dynamics invovled.

    In general, for whatever reason, you reached a point in your life in which you (perhaps even subconsiously) felt you had MORE to gain by NOT being a JW. You gave yourself permission to engage and indulge your doubts.

    Great question.

  • IWillBeDubbedNoMore
    IWillBeDubbedNoMore

    So what was it?

    Great question God_delusion. I have been trying to figure that out myself. After taking the "Red pill" I tried to open my family's eyes by giving them fact after fact. Have been doing it for years and whatever I say just goes in one ear and out the other. They dismiss anything negative. It seems like they don't reason on what is presented. Like their minds shut down and go into a protective mode. It is unbelievably frustrating.

  • oompa
    oompa

    i took the blue pill and had a 4 hour wonder of a prob........lol........not......but posted something about viagra on another thread just a bit ago.....just by chance............oompa

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit