I'd be interested to know your experiences if this applies to you.
I was in touch with an old friend and we got to talking about why it is that JWs don't reach out to their inactive friends.
This friend commented that "The reason why no one has reached out to you is because most JWs are required to display friendship, not because they like you but because they are told to."
In my old congregation, there were many "young ones"; dubs between the ages of 15 and 29. A couple of them showed interest in me but it never lasted, usually because others in the congregation would, in so many words, tell them I was bad association.
I did not fit in with the congregation I grew up in - and my peers let me know that. They ignored me as often as they could at the Kingdom Hall. Sometimes they would walk past me, other times they would give me a begrudging hello.
I only got to hear about their social life from other members of the congregation.
One brother who didn't like me at all, I made an effort with. He went abroad for a vacation and when he came back I took the iniative and phoned him and asked about his trip. He was pleasant enough, but nothing ever came of it.
There was one sister in particular who liked to have parties at her home and invite the younger set and the slighter older crowd. I was the only young JW not invited.
I remember one time after the meeting, one of my very few friends asked me what my plans were for that evening. I said I didn't have any at the moment. We went our separate ways but a few minutes later, when I went to suggest doing something, my friend was standing chatting with this sister who was organizing a party and suddenly told me they were busy that evening. I later found out that my friend had been invited to this sister's party but I wasn't.
Yet, this same sister had no problem asking me to cat sit for her or fix her computer, I just wasn't good enough to hang out with.
The second time she had a party, I managed to get myself invited - all the JW youths from my hall and others were there. It pissed me off that this had been going on for years, yet I was never allowed to be a part of that, all the while being told from the platform that "bad associations spoil useful habits"
I went to this sister's wedding not long after and I was invited back to her house for a small reception party. While I was in her back garden, I was chatting to some young people from another congregation when one of the brothers in my hall who was there asked me to get him another glass of wine.
As I was about to do this for him, his friend (a sister from another hall) interrupted him and said, "that's not nice what you're doing - why are you trying to get rid of him?" - I suddenly realized what he was doing, he was trying to get me out of his little clique, but his friend wised up to his tactics and felt bad for me - and I didn't even know her. Perhaps he felt theatened by me.
He and another friend would arrange most of the social life in the hall during the late 90s. I would only hear about their fun weeks after it happened.
Another example of being shunned by my peers is during one sister's annual BBQ. My family were always invited to this, including me, even after I left home, but none of my peers wanted anything to do with me. Once the niceties had worn off they went back to their own little cliques and I just sat by myself, wishing I could be one of them instead of an observer.
It was a lonely life for all my teen years and early 20s - perhaps you're thinking that I must have been the most awkward, difficult guy in the world to get along with - in fact, I was just the opposite - I treated everyone the same, I was a regular guy who had a miserable home life and was equally miserable in the congregation - a few friends could have been enough to prevent me from asking too many questions about the organization and looking outside the religion for answers - and here I am today, completely inactive and happy with my choice.
I recently visited my home town and for the first time ever, I never saw or looked up any members of my old hall. It felt weird. I had been away for so long and was now inactive and I felt as if someone else had lived that life I used to have at my old congregation.
I became inactive almost a year ago - in my old hall I made a couple of friends, one moved away the other is still there. He wasn't very regular but I would call him from time to time if I didn't see him there and we hung out occasionally.
I have never heard from him since - it's weird - you think you get to know someone and then when you leave the org it's like all that history counts for nothing.