JW's Sick Reaction to Death in the Family

OnTheWayOut

My wife's best friend had this very lazy sister. The sister in her early 40's has done
little work during her entire life. As it turns out, she was very lazy because she was
very sick. She didn't know it. Family didn't know it. They all just figured she was
lazy. New symptoms developed and it was suggested that she see a doctor immediately.

The best friend's sister went with her mother to the local doctor. He said she was going
to die very soon. They went to a specialist more than a thousand miles away to see what
could be done. While visiting the city where the specialist was, my wife's best friend's sister
died. So in the course of a few weeks, she went from lazy person to sick person to dead
person. Her mother had her cremated and returned home with the body.

HERE's THE SICK REACTION FROM FAMILY. The best friend and others in the family
had already purchased travel tickets so they could attend their District Convention. Because
of this, the funeral was postponed. The best friend and her brother were both at the same
DC that my wife was at. I saw them at dinner one night. They were explaining how they
had to travel to the funeral NEXT weekend.

The best friend lived in the same home with her sister and parents. The brother of the best
friend did not. I find it totally horrible that, no matter the previous plans, they did not change
them to be there for their grieving parents. Remember, this was a sudden diagnosis and a
sudden death. Mom and Dad were fully understanding of the delay to come because they
know that Jehovah's mind-control programs come first.

I am outraged at this reaction. I had to scream at Wings on the phone to avoid screaming at
these folks in person when I ate with them. (Thanks, Wings)

Comments and other stories of ridiculous JW behaviour are welcome here.

StAnn

OTWO, what does your wife think of these people?

StAnn

Lady Zombie

OnTheWay-

I'm sorry for your's and your wife's loss. The relationship with JWs and death has always been insane. JWs are not allowed to grieve, after all, they'll just see their family when they're resurrected, donchaknow!

Also, JW funerals are not funerals. Funerals are for the survivors to gather, say goodbye, and celebrate the life of the deceased. Not for the Dubbies! No, they use funerals as JW infomercials.

Some of the sickening things I've been told/overheard.

[when I objected that at my grandmother's funeral the freakin' brother delivering the eulogy only spent 5 or less minutes on her as a person] "A funeral is a great opportunity to witness. Your grandmother would have wanted it like that. You need to shut your mouth!"

"Oh well. We'll see them again in the new world!" [when a man and wife died in a car crash]

"Nothing should detract us in our ministry. Even the death of a loved one." [talk given from the platform during a Sunday meeting]

"You should not speak only of the deceased at a funeral. That would be giving worship to the person. All worship is for Jehovah!" [spoken by some CO dipshit]

I could go on but my blood is already boiling. I'm not a violent person, but sometimes I want to bash their faces in when this kind of shit happens.

sacolton

Hey, wings, can I call you and scream at you too?

OnTheWayOut

OTWO, what does your wife think of these people?
StAnn

I told my wife how it "appeared" very cold to postpone the funeral so that they
could attend the funeral after the DC. I said how I knew if even a cousin or older
aunt or uncle in her family died, she would be at her grieving relative's side ASAP.
I said it would be even faster if it were her sister or an extremely close relative.

My wife defended them. She said they didn't have the funds to just "give up" their
previous travel tickets. She said it wouldn't change anything if they had the funeral
any sooner. She said YADDA YADDA as a mind-controlled drone to defend their
attending the DC. I told her she could defend them all day, but it doesn't change the
fact that she knows she would not do that, but would be with family in their time of
stress and grief. I commended her for not being as fanatical as her best friend.
She didn't know how to react to that, so she was silent.

Lady Z: I'm sorry for your's and your wife's loss.

We barely knew the sister of the best friend. We met her within the last year.
That was it. We are not attending the funeral, but we already were there for the best
friend in the DC city. I met the mother and father and I don't need to meet them again.
If you wonder why, I had a thread about staying in tropical paradise at the home of
my wife's best friend. You could read it. This is the same family.

If that clarifies how far travel is, it still should make no difference.

Lady Z:
Some of the sickening things I've been told/overheard.
[when I objected that at my grandmother's funeral the freakin' brother delivering the eulogy only spent 5 or less minutes on her as a person] "A funeral is a great opportunity to witness. Your grandmother would have wanted it like that. You need to shut your mouth!"

Always the case. Every JW "memorial" to a person is a five-minute eulogy and a 30 minute
recruitment talk for non-JW family.

Sacolton: Hey, wings, can I call you and scream at you too?

She received it with full understanding. But I think she can't take any more of us people
with problems on her "close friends" list.

Vita Splash

First off, I want to extend my condolences for your wife and what she must be going through right now.

Second of all...I am sorry, but I disagree with your thoughts on the 'funeral.'

Let me explain. If it were a funeral where the person was 'intact', as in...not cremated, I can understand having the funeral soon since decomposition prevents an extended period of time to bury the body.

I see where it is convenient to make the witnesses seem uncaring, but my experience outside the Borg tells me that this is not unusual.

undercover

Considering how you've been trying to get your wife to open her eyes about this cult, StAnn had an excellent question...

What does your wife think of these people? (edited to add: your post answering StAnn and mine crossed in cyber space...)

This might be a jumping off place to start a conversation with her that shows just how unbalanced JWs can be...and we all know that they aren't unbalanced on their own, their pushed and prodded into it by the bOrg.

BTW, good to see you OTWO

OnTheWayOut

Vita Splash: Second of all...I am sorry, but I disagree with your thoughts on the 'funeral.'

I told my wife how it "appeared" very cold to postpone the funeral so that they
could attend the funeral after the DC. I said how I knew if even a cousin or older
aunt or uncle in her family died, she would be at her grieving relative's side ASAP.
I said it would be even faster if it were her sister or an extremely close relative.

To clarify, the actual time of a funeral is often postponed enough to give relatives
time to get there. I may have not made it clear enough. The dead person's
brother and sister could easily have gotten on a plane and been with their
mother and father and other stressed out relatives. The funeral could still have
been delayed, but being there for family should not be delayed by a whole week
because you have plans to attend the DC.

You are correct. About the funeral itself.
But get there and comfort your parents.

Is that clearer?

OnTheWayOut

This might be a jumping off place to start a conversation with her that shows just how unbalanced JWs can be...and we all know that they aren't unbalanced on their own, their pushed and prodded into it by the bOrg.
BTW, good to see you OTWO

Thanks for those thoughts, UC.

I already tried to make the point. I may file it under further review for later.
I just try to point out the ridiculous behaviour and then commend my wife for
not being like that. I hope that helps her see the difference between blind
obedience and thinking for yourself.

startingovernow

I'm wondering what surprises you about this. Have you ever seen someone actually being comforted over the loss of a loved one? I mean actually comforted, and supported? Not just, "you'll see them in the new system. I think of all the married people who have been supposedly comforted by being told this. When my husband's mother died and Witnesses were going through the line to give their "condolences", one after another kept asking him about the weather of the new city we had moved to. Nothing about his loss, nothing about the person she was. At one point someone kept asking question after question about where we had moved to that my husband finally told him the reason that he was there was because of his mom's death, and the brother (elder) didn't know what to say and so walked away. My husband's cousin (another elder) didn't say one word to him the whole time, no "I'm sorry for your loss", not even hello. There was no fall out between these two, and my husband was in good standing.

Even if these Witnesses rearranged there DC plans to be with the parents, of what comfort and help would they be?

JW's Sick Reaction to Death in the Family

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