Thank you, Baba. I little while ago I realized why I was so attached to songs, movies, thoughts, and dreams with bittersweet overtones. It was because I've wrapped up so many of my memories within the same kind of emotional context, unconciously, of course. These things become great sources of inspiration when I'm writing. All it takes is one listen to Dylan's "Boots of Spanish Leather" and I'm ready to pour it all out.
Nothing but the Blood - Chapter 4
by daniel-p 30 Replies latest jw friends
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mavie
Fantastic. You capture what it is like to be a JW so well. You had me teary eyed towards the end.
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Galileo
Thanks once again Daniel. Your imagery is amazing. I felt like I was there with you, although I never served at Bethel. I can't wait for the rest.
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beginnersmind
Hi could I be put on that list for a pm when the next chapter is ready please just in case I miss it? Somehow I missed the first 3 chapters you posted but I've just read all 4 now. Thanks for sharing your story.
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hubert
Incidentally, quite a poignant image, your name stamped in footprints in the snow.
I've written my name in the snow a few times.
Hubert
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SirNose586
I knew a couple of clowns like that Pavarotti guy you described. Smugly annoying, yet no one does a damned thing about it.
I wouldn't last one second in that joint. Now I've got to read the other 3 chapters!
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daniel-p
A clarification: Some have asked about this: I was not "dismissed" from Bethel. This is an important point to make in order to understand why I may have been able to fight my overseer's recommendation that I leave. They recommended I leave, not due to any specific failing of mine, but because they just didn't think I could thrive there. They let me think it over, and I then sent a letter to Operations (a department handling institutional decisions) letting them know of my decision to leave. They sent me back a letter, thanking me for my service. Then, a while later, another letter came, informing me of my exit date with other formalities.
Now, there was no garauntee that I would have been able to stay, even if I fought their decision, appealing to the Personnel department or whatever. My overseers were, in effect, forcing me out without using anything against me. In other words, they weren't playing hardball, not having anything serious against me. Yeah, they probably knew about the pornography, but by this time it was rampant in Bethel and I don't think they had a very hardline policy about it like they had before. I left Bethel with all my priveleges intact, including a good recommendation letter from my congregation (which, by the way, was run by Bethel elders with "jurisdiction" over the Bethelites in the congregation).
I hope this clears up any confusion. Being dismissed from Bethel is often accompanied by a disfellowshiping, as it is usally a pretty serious matter. Most dismissals and disfellowshipings are announced to the entire Bethel facility.
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Galileo
Yeah, they probably knew about the pornography, but by this time it was rampant in Bethel and I don't think they had a very hardline policy about it like they had before.
I have no doubt this is true, we are living in the internet age where teenagers now can't remember a time they didn't have free and easy access to porn, but how do you know this? Is it fairly common knowledge? I find this very interesting, especially if there's evidence that the elders there are looking the other way.
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daniel-p
Galileo: the strongest indication was that they made it a constant and regular topic of counsel during morning worship. One time, I remember one of the GB members urging us to approach our Bethel elders if we had a problem with it. He was almost getting all choked up. From the very first day until the last day I was there, masturbation was something they always brought up at morning worship, I would guess mentioning on the order of every single week.