It sounds like your dad was a good guy by the responses about him.
I'm glad you weren't shunned by all but frankly you should have been according to JW current teachings. Had your dad been DFed or been a witness not in good standing they would have not had your dads talk in the kingdom hall. Witnesses teach that a DFed one can be helped or talked to if they are on the side of the road with a flat tire and really need assistence, but talking to one because of even extreeme emotional moments is forbidden. I was at a funeral talk recently and an elders son was there who is disfellowshipped ( they were related to the deceased) and they ate together afterwards as the talk was in a rec hall since the KH was too small and they had a meal afterwards. Many others also talked to him. Witnesses break the rules when they see fit and 99% of them think the DF policy is a bunch of hooey anyways at least to the degree it's carried out.
Gumby