by teela(2) 13 Replies latest jw experiences
Very interesting question.
It is not that different from any religious person, as they also believe in a resurrection, only it is in heaven (as the Bible says it will be).
The big difference is that most Christians believe that the dead one is still alive immediately in heaven, so watching over you after death. So the Christian hope is more comforting than the Watchtower thought that the person is non existent in the ground.
It's hard to grasp just how much this belief affects the lives of the R&F. I have a friend who has been living a double life for 10+ years. She does this with her eyes open and yet won't consider the idea that the org is not the truth. She lost her mother last year and says that she can't live with the thouht she won't see her mother in the new system. (She doesn't quite grasp the fact that sleeping with her worldly boyfriend regularly might keep her out of that paradise . . . but that's her fantasy she's living in.) Anyway, I see that she just can't let go of that hope.
Dubs don't grieve. They've been programmed not to.
I don't think I even started grieving for my mum until after I left. It's easy to see why in a way, to deal with the fantasy you will see your loved ones again, real soon in a perfect world.
Problem is, with it comes emotions you don't get out of your system. Maybe it's a contributing factor to so many dubs being on anti-depressants.
I agree, as witnesses, we were not really able to grieve in a normal fashion. Also, grieving family members were not given much sympathy for their pain. They were expected to carry on in service with a smile on their faces, because their loved one was "only sleeping." It's horrible to expect that one must hide their very real pain, in order show how "faithful" they were.
