Hi everybody, after 4 years of having lurking through this forum (except one time that I asked an username and used it once),I have decided to participate in this. I am Spanish, I have been living in a small town in the north of Spain almos my whole life (except one year in Leicester-England), but currently I am lving in Germany. My story: I have been brought up in a catholic family, but the religion was never important in my familiy. It was just a matter of holidays and special events in church (baptisms, marriages, funerals and all that stuff). At 17 the Jehovahs Witnesses came to my door and I started to study with them. At 19 I was baptized in a District Convention. I was very sure that this was the truth and almost inmediately I started to pioneer, firtst auxiliary pioneer and, when I got a proper job, a regular pioneer. At 21, ministerial servant. After two years as a regular pioneer I gave up because of all the stress I had (working full-time, helping non-believing family who didnt support me, the tasks related to ms, etc). I went on being auxialiary pioneer almost regularly. I had several doubts about the organization, but I learnerd to pull them on the back of my mind and, on the surface, I was the perfect JW. When I was 31, I couldnt cope with the doubts anymore and decided first to give up being ministerial servant (january 2001) and later on attending meetings (I was regularly attending meetings until may 2001; then, I stopped completey and never went back, except for two weedings of friends). It was a relief for me, I didnt feel guilty for reading other stuff not controlled by the Watchtower Society. I read a lot about religions that year. In may 2002 I met the missionaries on the street. I started attending meetings in the Mormon Church and in august 2002 I did two things: I wrote my letter of disassociation and, two weeks later, I got baptized in the Mormon Church. After 4 years of being an active Mormon in my branch (teacher in Sunday school, counselor in the priesthood presidency - I dont know how to say this in English), several months ago I decided to leave this church again, but I dont feel I need to resign, just fade. Currently, I still attend some Sundays, while in Germany, but in august, when I will be back home in Spain, I think I will leave completely. Now I can say that I am agnostic, I tend to believe in Christ, I am very curious about him, but I am opened to any ideology. But I think that two organizations are enough and I dont want to belong to any organized religion anymore. I would like to study about religion more, I think it is a fascinating topic, but my "theocratic career" as a member of an organized religion has finished. Well, nice to talk to you and I hope that I will participate often in this forum.
Ex-jw, inactive mormon, and now what?
by olvidado 15 Replies latest jw friends
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fullofdoubtnow
Hi olvidado, and welcome to the forum.
You have had an interesting theological life!
I'm an ex jw, but I have not been tempted to join another religion myself. 25 years as a jw was more than enough for me. Most of us on here are fading or ex jws, but there is at least one mormon.
Linda
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olvidado
Thanks Linda for your welcome. Yes, I know that there was at least one mormon on the forum. Even if I belonged to these two organizations, I dont consider them as equal. To me, the Mormon church is really a "church", but the Watchtower society is more like a cult for me (that´s my oppinion). These last four years as a mormon I never felt compelled to avoid relationships with people out of the church, I felt encouraged to study my degree at university (something I would not have done if i stayed in JW), I wasnt asked to shun anybody, etc. Well, maybe if I was a mormon in Utah the things would be different, I dont know, but in Spain there is clearly a difference between the two groups. Thatis why I dont feel the need of asking to be removed from the Mormon church. Anyway, I am glad to be where I am today.
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nvrgnbk
Gracias for the telling of your story olvidado.
Time to live life, unfettered by the constraints of religion. Be here. Be now.
Deseandote much happiness and success as you continue your journey,
Nvr
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olvidado
Thanks nvr for your welcome. I know that it is time to move on. Almost all my life I lived with the feelings of having answers to the great questions of life (where do we come from? what can we expect after death? etc.) provided by Watchtower Society or the Mormon Church. Now I have to learn to live with no answers at all. But at the moment I am happy of that. Even if I dont get these answers in this life, it is good to live and enjoy the things I have. I appreciate your words in "spanglish", but I know that the rule in this forum is to use English. After a whole life following rules, this small rule is not very difficult for me to obey. My English is not very good, but I will try to be as clear as possible. Thanks again nvr.
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nvrgnbk
but I know that the rule in this forum is to use English.
Oops! Sorry friend. I'm glad you're accepting of living without the answers. It can be, I know from personal experience, quite unsettling.
Nvr
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olvidado
nvr, I didnt want to tell you off for using Spanish, it was not my intention. I think it was very kind of you using my language to make me feel comfortable in the forum. But one of the very first things I did after leaving JW was studying English and moving for one year to England and that is something I am very proud of, being able to communicate in a different language. If I knew kazajo? (is that the language spoken in Kazakhstan?) I would say something, but I dont know it at the moment. It is enough for me to struggle with Geman (the most difficult language in the world, I have to say).
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nvrgnbk
It is enough for me to struggle with Geman (the most difficult language in the world, I have to say).
I too would love to learn German. It is quite intimidating, to say the least. I applaud you for your excellent English. As you noted, my sprinkling of palabritas was purely intended to make you feel comfortable and welcome.
Nvr
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Kaput
Welcome, olvidado!
I would like to study about religion more, I think it is a fascinating topic, but my "theocratic career" as a member of an organized religion has finished.
Glad to hear that. After reading about your involvement with all these religions, I was beginning to feel you were a "sloooooow" learner. Looking forward to your posts.
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poppers
Welcome olvidado. I am glad that you don't feel a need to jump into another religion after your prior experiences. Too many people have a strong need to define themselves according to some belief system and flail about in a panic when leaving their religion, and look for another to fill the void of their abandoned belief. So, now what? Discover the fullness of life without belief, the fullness that exists in this very moment, the only moment there is.