My Dad died on Friday

by littlemike 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • littlemike
    littlemike

    I dont often post on here but lurk everday. I was an elder for 11 years, raised as a Witness from birth and eventually left in 2002 aged 42.

    My dad died on Friday aged 87. He was a Witness baptized in 1940. He was congregation servant and then elder in Hull, England.

    We were arranging his funeral tonight with my 2 brothers who are still Witness elders. All they were interested in was what he had done in the "truth". No mention of his work, family life etc. He was honestly a leader in 1/2 congregations in our area and now there are 7.

    The funeral is on Friday. I left 5 years ago after doing all the usual research and confirming what I had alway secretly thought.

    When I left in 2002 as an ex elder and person who was often on the Circuit Assemblies, nobody actually asked why I had left

    I in the next 2 years wrote my life story of of about 70 pages which was very helpful to me to get the reason off my chest.

    I have often said when my father passes away I would send all my ex-close Witness friends my life story which goes into absolutely everything! Ray Franz, Carl Olof Johnsonn etc, everything!

    This has now happened, and I am keen to do it, but my kids dont agree.

    My explanation is "Nobody Asked Why" if it was the truth it would stand up to any critisism.

    They all came up withj there own theores as to why I left, which were wrong such as Materialism, to save his marriage etc, but they

    were wrong

    I always said when my dad passed away I would send them my story as to why I left. The story is exceedingly detailed about 1914/607 etc and all the other false teachings.

    SO WHAT DO YOU THINK SHOULD I SEND MY 6 OR 7 CLOSES WITNESS FRIENDS MY STORY

    CONSEQUENCES!

    1.My 2 brothers wont talk to me

    2. Be disfellowshipped

    But everyone will know the TRUTH.

    Opinoin please

    Mike

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    My deepest sympathy Mike.... Death of a loved one is hard to deal with As for writing about the WT if it is going to help YOU!!!! I would say go for it. If it will hurt your kids & wife I would say write it, but dont publish it for them to read. But I would love to read your life in bondage. I find writing stuff out & rereading it helps me But I am an odd ball

  • Carmel
    Carmel

    First Mike, I applaud you for writing down exactly why you left and second that you waited until your father passed so as to avoid an unnecessary burden on him. If I were you, I would go right a head. The rumor mill of the society needs a kick in the gut as often as possible. It may trigger another soul to seriously look into the truth about the "truth".

    carmel

  • averyniceguy
    averyniceguy

    You will be disfellowshipped for apostasy, if that is what you want to do. If I were you, make sure that you really want to do it. If it were for me, I would not do it because I have family that is still JW and you have a family that is JW, so count the cost before you do it.

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    So sorry about your father. I lost mine a couple of years ago. He, too, was in his 80's and things changed a lot after his death.

    Do your brothers now speak to you? If they do and you have a close relationship with them, be prepared for another kind of "death" when you send your letter. I've found that when you finally know the truth about this cult, you just want to vent and rage and TELL SOMEBODY!!!! But think long and hard about the consequences. Ask yourself if you can achieve a cathartic release some other way without the drama that will surely be incurred once you send your letter. Writing it down and reading and re-reading it helps....I know.

  • bluebell
    bluebell

    I'm sorry to hear about your Dad. Its nice that you had decided to wait until his death before outing your apostasy :)

    Really it is up to you as to how close you are to your family and how disfellowshipping/being labeled as aposate will affect you and your family. If you can cope with it and your family can cope with it - go ahead!

  • ex-nj-jw
    ex-nj-jw

    Sorry to hear about your dad, how are you holding up?

    nj

  • nvrgnbk
    nvrgnbk

    I'm deeply sorry for your loss. Only you know the best way in which to proceed with the information you've compiled. I'm sure you'll make the decision that's right for your current circumstances.

    My condolences,

    Nvr

  • juni
    juni

    I'm sorry about your Dad little Mike. I have to agree with what the other posters wrote. I know from counseling that it is cathartic to journal your feelings and write a letter to the person who did you harm, but not necessarily send it. This would be for you to consider what may come of it.

    I wish you peace,

    Juni

  • LeslieV
    LeslieV

    I am sorry to hear about your father. It doesn't matter how old someone is, it sure is a loss to you and your family.

    You have to decide if you can live with the consequences of your sending the letter. If they talk to you now, they will not after you send the letter. You have to figure out if it is worth it or not. As was mentioned what is healing is in the writing, doesn't mean you have to send it. You are in my thoughts.

    Leslie

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