Advice needed on Crisis of Conscience

by cappytan 37 Replies latest watchtower bible

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  StarTrekAngel

  I think she should see the video where Lett so blatantly lies, specially if the subject of child abuse is fresh in her mind. Why read about and old lie, written long ago if you have a recent one? Specially if you compare that the book is a PDF you get online, against a video of their own channel? Not that the book is bad, but if you weight them both, which one is refutable and which one is not?

  Also, you could just tell her what chapter to read, regarding the dfing of Ray Franz and then let her own curiosity drive her to read on her own.
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  Splash

  Or show her from the Elders book where you can be DF'd just for what you think.
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  Giordano

  Sometimes you can make a point by not making a point but sharing something.

  Ask if she knows which US President was raised as a JW actually as a watchtower guided International Bible Student.

  The Kingdom Hall was in his families living room. His father and all of his brothers left the religion. But the mother remained a JW until she passed.

  His abilities, skills and compassion saved the lives of Jews and JW's among others when his armies liberated the concentration camps.

  Sometimes you can have a lively discussion when you come at it a little differently.

  Separate long term and cherished beliefs from the practicality of being a JW.

  http://www.adherents.com/people/pe/Dwight_Eisenhower.html
  
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  Illuminated

  I would buy a hard copy and place it around the house. It'll be more tempting to read it versus an email which you can easily close and ignore.

  You can always read it together. One chapter at a time, then give her time to digest the information until she's ready to read the next.
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  brandnew

  Its a trip , but if one member of the family comes out with proven facts regarding gb ,or jwdom as a whole.......they jump in the car.

  Who wouldnt? Who likes fieldservice? Who likes long dragged out meetings?.....Sounds like she was just waiting for you to jump, in order for her to also... I believe its happening everywhere....good luck CAPPYTAN ! !
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  steve2

  Ask yourself, Where is the urgency? There is absolutely and positively none. The sense of panic and/or misgivings stem from the "old" way of persuading others that the organization is the "truth" and that they need to choose quickly because the end of this system is coming. Well, actually, it ain't - so again, ask yourself, Where is the urgency?

  Time - lovely, sweet, unfolding time - is on your side. Each year that passes sees the 1914 doctrine fade in relevance and become nicely more unsound.

  You can actually afford to treat this as a stroll whose pace would only ever quicken if the old JW mindset flooded you from time to time.

  Because you know TTATT you are in a better position than your wife to help her pace things. She will at times automatically fly back into panic mode (i.e., the end is coming, Satan is infiltrating the congregations, you must not read apostate literature, etc).

  There is in fact no urgency - except that which is created by a panicked mindset that still buys into the organization's mind-closing propaganda.
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  OneEyedJoe

  Steve2 - you make a good point. I have to constantly remind myself that time is on my side. Even knowing that on a rational level, it's very difficult to get it to sink in. Being stuck in the cult, you just want out NOW. Getting out feels urgent because every cult meeting, every bitten tongue when the in-laws use the term "the truth" for the hundredth time and every cold glare from your normally loving spouse all feels like an imminent threat to your sanity.

  I guess the key is finding an outlet and playing the long game. It's tough to do, but oh so rewarding to see people beat this cult at their own game.
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  StarTrekAngel

  Well, I respectfully disagree. There is a certain urgency. The urgency comes from the fact that while we seat patiently waiting, not allowed to speak, caught up in dealing with day to day matters regarding our life, eight individuals up in Bethel have a full time job dedicated to combating what we know and what we could possibly say. Every slow step you take, they could be ahead of you by miles.

  With this I am not saying you should rush into things. There is a time for everything, but synergy is always good. I think it should be treated like the Tai chi of indoctrination.
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  FayeDunaway

  Order the book on Amazon. Then tell her how surprised you were by Ray franz' tone. I think she got the impression he was a hateful guy from what you said about the book. Tell her he was one of the most loving peaceable men ever alive and a true role model for anyone. Also, listen...I know you said your world came crashing down by reading the book. For me it didn't at all. It just confirmed some intuitions that I had always had about the religion. And like Ray franz, I still have a strong faith in God. If it's all or nothing for you, then yes I think it can be a devastating read. You don't know which way your wife will go. She might still believe in God...and if so, reading the book is not devastating, it's affirming. Have the book around for when she's ready, just tell her it's there.
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  disposable hero of hypocrisy

  I can't remember who said it, but someone gave me the advice to 'let HER progress determine the speed of your fade' .

  Kindalike being out for a walk with little kids, you go at their pace then they don't get disheartened.