The Funeral

by purplesofa 53 Replies latest jw friends

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa


    As you all know my brother was buried yesterday.

    He was 33......... He did this ..........17 years after his father commited suicide.

    The funeral took place at the funeral home.......a witness elder did the funeral.....my brother is not a witness, but my mother is. He went into why we die and the hope of the ressurection. He read too many scriptures and I was told by many they just had to block him out. One girl said he was all over the bible and she just could not keep up. But he was kind and soft spoken, and said so many nice things about my brother.

    My brother had tons of friends, and so many thought of him as a best friend. The women he knew were beautiful. He kept good company for sure.

    I found myself comforted knowing that my brother was not suffering any longer. I did not think about the ressurection.. I can't worry about seeing him in the future when I am trying to come to grips with missing him.

    When my brothers father died(my step-father) suicide was considered a death with no ressurection but the society has changed its view since then. I just don't want to take anyones opinion anymore..........it was very hurtful back then, when in fact they do not know, they can only speculate what happens after someone dies.

    So for me, my brother is no longer alive, whether I see him or not is not my main concern. I think what is, is living life more fully, becoming more aware of .....more sensitive to what someone has to say or what they do not say.

    The people from my mothers congo brought food and were very supportive to her.

    I worked very hard to make the funeral a place where all who knew my brother could come.........from all religions........and all backgrounds. The main point is that the people that knew and loved him could be there. That what was foremost important to me. I will always feel good about that.

    Beautiful sunflowers were on his casket.....he looked very peaceful. I will miss him dearly. I have wonderful memories of him and I am very sorry he felt the need to end his life. It was his decision and I respect it.

    much love,

    purps

    I thank the people from the board for their support, phone calls, pm's, emails........etc. My support system is in transition, and never forget what a kind word can do for someone even coming from a stranger.

    The music played was .....".You are the sunshine of my life" by Stevie Wonder

    "I hope" by the Dixie Chicks ( not a dry eye in the place when this was played)

    "When I Get Where I am Going" by Brad Paisley

    Sunday morning, I heard the preacher say
    Thou shall not kill
    I don't wanna, hear nothin' else, about killin'
    And that it's God's will
    Cuz our children are watching us
    They put their trust in us
    They're gonna be like us
    So let's learn from our history
    And do it differently

    CHORUS:
    I hope
    For more love, more joy and laughter
    I hope
    We'll have more than we'll ever need
    I hope
    We'll have more happy ever afters
    I hope
    We can all live more fearlessly
    And we can lose all the pain and misery
    I hope, I hope

    Oh Rosie, her man he gets too rough
    And all she can say, is he's a good man
    He don't mean no harm
    He was just brought up that way
    But our children are watching us
    They put their trust in us
    They're gonna be like us
    It's okay for us to disagree
    We can work it out lovingly

    For I hope
    For more love, more joy and laughter
    I hope
    You'll have more than you'll ever need
    I hope
    You'll have more happy ever afters
    I hope
    And you can all live more fearlessly
    And you can lose all your pain and misery
    I hope, I hope


    There must be a way to change what's going on
    No, I don't have all the answers

    I hope
    For more love, more joy and laughter
    I hope
    you'll have more than you'll ever need
    I hope
    There'll be more happy ever afters
    I hope
    We can all live more fearlessly
    And we can lose all the pain and misery
    I hope, I hope


    I hope
    I hope
    I hope

  • crazyblondeb
    crazyblondeb

    Hugs to you!! If you get a chance and want to talk, call me, if you still have me number. At least you were there to say good-bye, and make all those that were there for the same reason feel welcome!

    blessings be,

    shelley

  • kgav8r
    kgav8r

    I am so sorry purps. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I know what it is like to lose someone so close. I am glad you were able to be in an environment where those of all faiths could remember your brother and give you and your family all the support you need.

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    ((((Purplesofa))))

    I am so sorry. I will be thinking of you.

    love

    Linda

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    alt

    My brother.............I miss you.

  • looking_glass
    looking_glass

    Purps, again, my sympathies. If after the shock has worn off, you find that you are struggling with his death and manner in which he died, there are tons of support groups out there for family members who has suffered a loss thru suicide.

    Hugs - L_G

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    {{{[ Purps }}} There are few words one can say.... I hope your pain subsides soon and the sweet memories of your brother sustain you 'til you meet again (I have no doubts)

    Double Edge

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    I am having a difficult time tonight.........

    thanks for the board to let me post.

    Artist/Band: Paisley Brad
    Lyrics for Song: When I Get Where I'm Going
    Lyrics for Album: Time Well Wasted

    (Feat. Dolly Parton)

    When I get where I'm going
    On the far side of the sky
    The first thing that I'm gonna do
    Is spread my wings and fly

    I'm gonna land beside a lion
    And run my fingers through his mane
    Or I might find out what it's like
    To ride a drop of rain

    (Chorus:)
    Yeah when I get where I'm going
    There'll be only happy tears
    I will shed the sins and struggles
    I have carried all these years
    And I'll leave my heart wide open
    I will love and have no fear
    Yeah when I get where I'm going
    Don't cry for me down here

    I'm gonna walk with my grand daddy
    And he'll match me step for step
    And I'll tell him how I missed him
    Every minute since he left
    Then I'll hug his neck

    (Chorus)

    So much pain and so much darkness
    In this world we stumble through
    All these questions I can't answer
    So much work to do

    But when I get where I'm going
    And I see my maker's face
    I'll stand forever in the light
    Of his amazing grace
    Yeah when I get where I'm going
    There'll be only happy tears
    Hallelujah
    I will love and have no fear
    When I get where I'm going
    Yeah when I get where I'm going

  • LDH
    LDH

    Purp,

    I'm stunned to hear this, what a loss for your family. I'm very sorry. A cyber hug for you. 33 is too young to go.

    Love,

    Lisa

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    Hemingway called them "black ass days". No one who has experienced that black pit of despair can describe it to another. Or at least I know I can't.

    I'm very, very sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.

    When my step-father killed himself, I heard "I'm With You" by Avril Lavigne and I thought of him. To this day, when I hear it, I think of him.

    Be well.

    "I'm With You"

    I'm standing on a bridge
    I'm waiting in the dark
    I thought that you'd be here by now
    Theres nothing but the rain
    No footsteps on the ground
    I'm listening but there's no sound

    Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
    Won't somebody come take me home?
    It's a damn cold night
    Trying to figure out this life
    Won't you take me by the hand
    Take me somewhere new
    I dont know who you are
    But I ... I'm with you

    I'm looking for a place
    Searching for a face
    Is anybody here I know?
    'cause nothing's going right
    And everything's a mess
    And no one likes to be alone

    Isn't anyone tryin' to find me?
    Won't somebody come take me home?
    It's a damn cold night
    Trying to figure out this life
    Won't you take me by the hand
    Take me somewhere new
    I dont know who you are
    But I ... I'm with you

    Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
    Won't somebody come take me home
    It's a damn cold night
    Trying to figure out this life
    Won't you take me by the hand
    take me somewhere new
    I dont know who you are
    But I ... I'm with you


    Oh why is everything so confusing
    Maybe I'm just out of my mind
    Yeah yeah yeah

    It's a damn cold night
    Trying to figure out this life
    Won't you take me by the hand?
    Take me somewhere new
    I dont know who you are
    But I ... I'm with you

    Take me by the hand
    Take me somewhere new
    I dont know who you are
    But I ... I'm with you
    I'm with you

    Take me by the hand
    take me somewhere new
    I don't know who you are
    But I ... I'm with you
    I'm with you
    I'm with you ...

    Chris

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