The term used in (I believe) the OM book was "physical or spiritual endangerment."
Divorce for emotional abuse?
by somebodylovesme 13 Replies latest jw friends
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Fleur
They told me that I had to tell him before the divorce was filed in the courts because if I didnt then it would make him scriptually free and I wouldnt be. So I filed late on a tuesday afternoon where they couldnt file till Wed. and I told him that tues. night.
I've never heard that one, must be new since I left, but then every BOE seems to have its own little rulebook to play by.
When I begged the elders (and I mean begged) for help with the emotional abuse, physical intimidation I had in my first marriage (I didn't tell them about the sexual coercion or I know my mate would kill me) they told me to "be a better wife and pray more."
I decided to be a better human being and mother and dump the man, and the cult. Best decision I ever made, even if it did cost me 99.9% of my family. My child will never think that that is how a man who loves a woman treats her, ever.
But as far as your friend goes, with emotional abuse, she's SOL if she wants to remarry. Unless he has an, um, indescretion first...she's going to get booted out, no doubt if she tries to date anyone.
Before I knew the 'truth' about the teachings of the cult, this was the issue that had me swearing I'd never go back; that I will never again support an organization that encourages the domination of women. The whole headship arrangement is perfect for abusers, they get away with the everything they want to do to a woman under that block title; the whole lot.
Never going back, and never looking back.
essie
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poodlehead
I knew a women who did not have grounds for devorice. But her husband would not go to meeting and was just not there for her. She got a devorice and was not counceled for it. However and this is the best part. He left the JW's and began dating. He has had many girlfriends but he is so angry with the JW's for there treatment of him, he will not tell his Ex-wife that he has had sex with anyone. It has been over 7 years and she is still single. She has no proof that he is sleeping with these women so what can she do, she must take his word for it.
I wish I would have thought about that when I got a devorice.
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Mars68
An end to domestic violence
Quoted from jw org "An end to domestic violence "
"a legal divorce or a legal separation may provide a measure of protection from further abuse.”—March 15, 1983, pages 28-9; see also the issue of November 1, 1988, pages 22-3.
What a victim chooses to do in these circumstances must be a personal decision. “Each one will carry his [or her] own load.” (Galatians 6:5) No one else can make such a decision for her. And no one should try to pressure her to return to an abusive husband where her health, life, and spirituality are threatened. That must be her own choice, of her own free will, not because others are trying to impose their will on her.—See Philemon 14."
https://wol.jw.org/en/wol/d/r1/lp-e/101993083