I think my boyfriend and I broke up for good...

by kristyann 13 Replies latest jw friends

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  daystar

  It sounds like he is much like I used to be. He may know that he is lying, but because he is so concerned about appearing to be the honest person he imagines himself to be, he won't easily admit to his dishonesty. He still wants to be perfect.

  I suspect that he is right that you and he won't be able to be friends. There is no doubt that he is in a lot of pain. However, he is going to have to go through much more pain before he comes to terms with what he has been and what he wants to become.

  Does anyone think crazy JW families can screw someone up permanently and make them REALLY bad to have relationships with?

  Not necessarily permanently. However, until he deals with his issues somewhat, either through time and introspection or with the help of therapy, anyone he becomes involved with is likely going to have to deal with the same junk.

  Good luck! You seem like a bit of a catch in more ways than one. I'm sure you'll come out of this fine.
• 

  Crumpet

  Does anyone think crazy JW families can screw someone up permanently and make them REALLY bad to have relationships with?

  My boyfriend of 8 years and the one before of 3 years would say - definitely YES. Luckily they are both extremely patient and forgiving.
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  bebu

  That's tough to go through. Sorry to hear this.

  I know it may not sound like much consolation, but imagine trying to deal with this while married. Spouses in denial can be so hard to deal with.

  Your standing firm about this help him to finally face his weaknesses and deal with them. If so, he'll have to say it was the best thing you could have done.

  Good luck,

  bebu
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  Has your boyfriend contacted agencies such as Catholic Social Services or the local mental health center about counseling? Both of them would operate on a sliding fee scale. They'd base their fees on his income.