SELF ESTEEM in the organization

justice for all

Did your self esteem increase or decrease after being in the organization for a while?

kls

Decreased, no matter what i did or said i was always doing or saying something wrong,i was constantly being corrected or glared at.

whyamihere

Did your self esteem increase or decrease after being in the organization for a while?

Decreased!....Although, I was born into it, the older I got the less self esteem I had. My mother always saying she has horrible children. Yet, people were amazed how well 6 kids sat there dressed top notch. Well we were afraid of her. As time went on, being told I was nothing, and hoped to marry well, because I wouldn't amount to anything can take a toll on you. I was told what to do all my life,. Home, and Congregation. I was never good enough. At the congregation, I was looked as a slut, because I wasn't ugly, and I was nice to all(being nice to a guy is bad). I was thought of as bad by all the women. Also, anything I did in the congregation as bad. I remember once I was talking to an Elder...I told him how much I enjoyed his talk. He said thank you, but then turned the illustration to me. He said, I was like the people of the world, and I was going down with them.(seriously) At the age of 15 I was throwing up.(bulimia) It was the only thing I had to control was my food intake. My mother was always on my case since my sister was heavy, and I wasn't. Making sure I wouldn't be like her. Even though she was her favorite. My mother took it out on me. It would have been better if I was the fat one and my sister wasn't. I thought I was nothing, a nobody. I still have a hard time with it. I am still trying to gain some self esteem. Brooke

kls

Brookie , look at them and look at you . You are better then they could ever or will be (((((((((((hugs ))))))))))

serendipity

Before we became JWs the only praise I got was from a teacher occasionally, not from my parents. After we became JWs, my behavior and grades improved so I got more praise from teachers (couldn't reflect badly on Jehovah, could I?). Because I was a zealous teen JW, I got a lot of positive reinforcement from the cong. I have to say that my self esteem increased, but I'm an internally motivated person for the most part anyway.

stillajwexelder

I never let it decrease - even after I resigned as an elder , I held my head high

The Lone Ranger

Brooke..If I may ask, Where was your dad during all of this? During my time in the WT, I've noticed how many really do have low self esteem. I have noticed that many who brag and big-note themselves actually have very low esteem.

It's no wonder, they are all driven by Guilt not Love.

whyamihere

Brooke..If I may ask, Where was your dad during all of this?

I asked the same question, during that time. I needed him.

However, he is my life now. That's all that matters.

Brooke

The Lone Ranger

Thanks Brooke. Alot of the men, husbands and fathers, in the WT don't really have a 'say' in the upbringing of the children, they seem to be too busy climbing up the 'spiritual' ladder. Most of them seem to be too lazy or too weak to take control as a Man should.

daniel-p

I felt beat down all the time - and mostly when I was doing everything - but I always had high self-esteem. Thank goodness I do have high self-esteem because I've seen many brothers and sisters get depressed and develop all sorts of negative personality traits because they feel worthless in the organization. That's the thing - the society is always quick to remind us how worthless and disposable we are since Jehovah only has "loyal-love" for us - meaning of course, that if we are the slightest bit disloyal to him we are thrown away like trash. Constructing a God like that does wonders if you want to maintain control over a tribe, nation, or religion.

SELF ESTEEM in the organization

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