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dawgLong last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet


Dad,
I doubt you’ll even read this letter since it comes from your son, a son you’ve abandoned over your religious views, but I wanted to write you one final letter to see if there’s any hope that you can come to your senses as far as this religion goes and we can renew our relationship. I’m doing this because I care for you and Mom deeply and feel very much distressed that you two refuse to see anyone’s opinion as being factual other than your own when it concerns the JW religion. Years have gone by Dad, years where you’ve allowed men to come between us… how do you think that makes me feel when I have surveyed the facts, found things about these men that run the organization that I cannot with good conscience live with, and you ignore my truths and call me a “fornicator”, or some other name you think condemns me? My own father does this instead of having a rational conversation where two sides are presented, the facts are weighed and measured, and conclusions drawn. Instead I get guilt trips from you and Mom, all the while using circular arguments that don’t hold sway in an attempt to defend these men whom you don’t even know? Attacking my character, acting like I’m evil while ignoring the facts? I can tell you one fact that can’t be disputed; the Jehovah’s Witnesses do NOT tell converts all that they need to know about this organization before they join, they don’t tell those born in either. Facts that would make anyone reading them give pause to surrendering their lives to an organization filled with so many flaws. I find this whole thing unfair; few would baptize themselves in this faith if they knew all the comical actions committed by these men. Yet all this information is withheld from the unsuspecting convert, be they born into this religion, or converted from the outside. A recent article in the newspaper, says that the JW’s are the fastest growing religion; in fact they we’re the only religion to experience growth last year. Considering the fact they are the only ones to openly try and convert followers in the door to door ministry that’s easy to believe; but did you know they are also dead last in retention of members? That’s right Dad, 67% who join this faith drop out eventually; I believe that’s because they find out things about this organization they can’t live with. Those people aren’t “fornicators” Dad; they are people like me that simply believe the facts speak for themselves.

It amazes me that my letters come back returned to sender; I’m your only son and every letters I’ve written have been kind and affectionate. I presented my views with facts, you answered back with circular arguments that I find hard to believe you actually think are real. It really begs the question as to how far your mind has gone in relation to your views about the so called “faithful and discreet slave”; as I stated in my last letter, there is no scripture that says I can’t question men; you have proven my argument correct as you are now shunning me for openly saying I don’t believe these men have told their followers the truth. I have often questioned whether you know the difference between these men and the actual word of God, as you call anyone who questions these men that run this organization “apostate” when they deny any interpretation that these men have handed down. How can a man be “apostate” to God for questioning men if you that follow this faith don’t consider them as equals? Your actions in shunning me have proven what I’ve said all along, that you in this faith consider whatever mandate handed down from the GB the same as if it came from God himself.

I want to remind you which one of us threw up a gauntlet; I was told 18 years ago, when I first realized that much of what the JWs teach was false, that I had to conform to be treated normally like your son. Show me where I’ve ever told you that you have to believe in God the same as I do to be treated like my father? I’ve never said that, it’s been you all these years trying to make me feel guilty for not believing the JWs have the truth; years where you didn’t talk to me in one stretch, years where you only visited me once, years where I was denied access to my family at social functions, vacations, and everything else. I really wonder sometimes if you even have the ability to put the shoe on the other foot, to think about how this shunning has made me feel? How would you like it if you in good conscience found out things about your religion, things that you knew for a fact were not true but you were shunned for or treated like you had the plague for not going along with known falsehoods?

I’ll give you a prime example… 607BC is not the date Jerusalem fell; this means that all associated dates the WT uses, including 1914 are false. You’ll not find one scholar that will say that 607BC is the correct date; yet all agree with the 586BC date. Carloff Johansen was a JW that started studying WT mandated date of 607BC; he found that 586BC is backed up with so much evidence that it can’t be denied. Johansen wrote to the society and told them of his discovery and was told if he didn’t continue to teach the known false date of 607BC, he’d be dis-fellowshipped for ‘apostasy’! Do you think God sanctions actions like these, where men can’t even be shown known facts that prove them wrong, and instead of doing as David did and admitting they’ve sinned, they execute the messenger? This is what the bullies in the GB do to anyone that has the gall to read the Bible for themselves and come to personal conclusions. The society does just as you do, ignore the facts, and then discard those that have the nerve to point out the truth. That’s no way to find the legitimacy of an issue, and it destroys the lives of those of us that know better. We are left scratching our heads and wondering what went wrong with those we love; Then after we present the known facts, we are called all kinds of names and subsequently shunned. What kind of person does this to their loved ones? Uses their love as a tool of blackmail to keep their children enslaved to men that are teaching known false doctrine? Do your own research Dad, for once don’t read just what the “Society” has to say about it; read where men with no agenda have offered absolute proof that 607BC isn’t the correct date for the fall of Jerusalem. Honestly, I have no idea where Russell got this incorrect information, but the facts speak for themselves.

I remember you as a man I looked up to… I admired you for your fortitude, for standing up for what’s right, and I was told by my father that I should always stand up for the truth. Then I discovered that the JWs had built a mansion for returning “worthies” who they predicted would come in 1929 to “take possession”… when that prediction failed, “Judge” Rutherford moved in; the JW’s had also made false predictions based on the great pyramid of Giza, predicted Armageddon several times, changed policies on organ transplants, blood transfusions, the generation of 1914, oral sex between married couples… and on and on and on… too many gaffs to mention! After I left the “organization” they later went on to protect molesters within the ranks by not turning in pedophiles to the civil authorities. A case in California this week has went to trial only because the Elders were forced by civil law to testify against a known pedophile; these Elders had to be forced to testify by law…The WTBTS has also recently lost a case for millions of dollars as they were found accountable for not turning child abuse cases into the civil authorities-allowing other children to be molested by previously known pedophiles within their ranks. All of this is pretty damaging to their creditability, but they also later joined the UN as a NGO (Non-governmental Organization) wrote several articles in the WT magazines that complemented the UN (this was part of the agreement to become member of the NGO charter); sent emissaries to UN meetings… all of this is very injurious to their claim to have “God’s spirit” guiding their work. I’ve read the memo sent out to the congregations trying to explain their actions in regards to them joining the UN; the excuse was given that they simply wanted to use the UN library, but several people have written the UN and found this excuse to be false. That means the memo sent to the congregations was a fabricated explanation for their actions; what are those of us searching for truth supposed to think when we see a known falsehood spoken by these men? Do you think God sanctions known lies such as these?

So what was I supposed to do Dad, having known much of this information for years and yet being told by you that I had to comply or not be treated like a son should be treated? I can see that there were times you tried to act like a father to me, but even you admitted in your last letter that you have not treated me the same as you used to ever since I decided I could no longer in good conscience teach known falsehoods. Yet, in each letter you state time and again that I’m going against “Jehovah” by not doing what these men say; you call me “fornicator” and say many more slanderous things about my character all the while closing your mind to what I’m saying. What am I to make of this when I know that these men who run the “organization” are the ones I’m attacking; I’m not attacking Jehovah? Do you consider the words of these men as the same as words from God himself? I think your actions have proven beyond a doubt that you’ve have now gone so far that you can’t see the difference, that you do NOT see these men as being just men. Until you can show me from the Bible where I’ve slandered God by telling the truth about these false men, then I think it’s you that may be showing signs of ‘apostasy” towards God by not adhering to his word. The Bible states “not to place your trust in nobles, nor the son of earthly men”; so why do you place so much belief in men that have already been shown to commit comical follies? I feel as if you owe me an explanation for your actions since it’s these very actions that are keeping us from a father son relationship. Not one person I know thinks badly of me, not one person doesn’t see that I have high character. You taught me these morals, but when it comes to the JW religion, you abandon them yourself. Why? Do you really fear these men so much that you actually believe that you can’t stand up to them and yet be found worthy by God? That you have to teach exactly what they say just to have God’s approval?

In closing, I want to say that I’m sorry our lives ended like this, I remember us playing golf and hanging out together and so many wonderful things about you and Mom and the many members of my family who no longer talk to me. But none of my relationships are worth me giving my power of reason to a group of men who have proven themselves false. You are from another generation; information wasn’t as easily obtainable as it is to us who have grown up in the modern age. But I can’t see how you discovering the truth about these men now in your later years dissolves your responsibility to stick to the facts. I’m sure no one would think less of you if you took the proper stand against these men now even though it is late coming. Regardless of which conclusion you arrive at, as long as you feel that you are teaching the facts according to your conscience, I’ll agree to let you be as far as your religion goes, can you do the same? Will you ever realize that there are many of us who were raised in this religion that no longer agree with its dictates and can no longer in good conscience remain silent about what we know, or do you feel that only (blank) has the right to speak about what he thinks? Or that only JWs have the right to interpret the information and speak in public about what they know? I look forward to hearing from you; I wonder if you love your son enough to show the bravery to even read this letter or answer it, and I often think of how unbelievable this is, you own son can’t even form an opinion of his own without being regarded as evil. I find this whole situation hard to accept, and it gives a very poor account for the so called “truths” you say you believe. Apparently it only a truth when you believe it, all others are just too stupid to weigh the facts for themselves; at least that’s what it sounds like to me.

Take care Dad, I wish you the best.


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Lo-ru-hamahRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

Dawg

It is a great letter.  Hope he reads it and comes around again.  I can't imagine the loss you feel.

Sheri

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scotsmanRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet
Intense indeed.  But he's returned all your other letters unopened?  send him a post card, tell him that you love him and that your door will always be open to him, no conditions or accusations.  If it's your last word to him make it simple and positive.  You're the better man.
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*summer*Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

A great letter that sent shivers down my spine, and brought misty eyes:-(

A letter obviously straight from your heart.

I can only try to imagine getting such a letter from my own son...

I sure hope he takes time to read it.

And if not, it will be a great loss on both sides...all in the name of religion that is supposed to unite the world:-(



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SironaRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

I was going to suggest perhaps a less harsh approach, until I read that he has corresponded before and you've gotten nowhere.

I take it that the softly softly approach did no good.

I really feel for you.  Its a horrid situation to be in.  You did set him straight on the abandoning Jehovah thing.  You didn't abandon Jehovah, you abandoned lying men.  There is a big difference.

GOOD FOR YOU!

Its important for you to express these things.  I really hope he responds.

Only one error I can see - 67%of those raised in the JWs leave.  Not 67% of all JWs.

Sirona

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BFDRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

Powerful letter, dawg.  I hope he at least reads it.  I don't know what else you can do.  I wrote letters to my mom for years even before I found JWD.  Never got a reply, don't even know if she read any of them. 

The whole thing just eats me up inside sometimes.  I am so sorry that you know exactly what I mean.

BFD

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VelvetannRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

Dawg

What a heartfelt letter.  It brought tears to my eyes.  You obviously spoke from the heart and you presented it without hate.  I just hope he reads it and opens his heart to you and to the truth.

Velvetann

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OnTheWayOutRe: Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet
You're the better man.

I tend to agree with everything Scotsman says.  You probably won't get any response at all to
this letter.  A postcard that says, "I am there for you no matter what you believe."  would be
far better. 

If this is something you must send, then don't defend it to us or take a poll, just send it.  If you
truly want some results, then don't send this letter.  That's my opinion.

IP: V6NggEvFWK/CdbTI
TIMBOBRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

Good letter. Must of been a difficult thing to do.

Hope it turns out good.

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BurnTheShipsRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

Wow dawg.

Just, wow.

I feel for you man. A father is a hard thing to lose.

Burn

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Meeting Junkie No MoreRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

OK, Dawg;

For what it's worth, here's my opinion.  I don't know all the ins and outs of your situation, so this may be miles off the mark.  Letters are so impersonal IMHO - any chance you can just show up with a couple of McDonald's coupons and offer to take your Dad out for a burger and give him a hug?  And then just tell him you decided to do it for the simple reason that you are still here on this earth, he is still here on this earth, and there's no time like the present to reach out and touch your most dearly beloved?  If he says he can't go, so be it but you made the effort.  100% BETTER than any card or letter...again just my 2c.

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loosieRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet
I was told 18 years ago, when I first realized that much of what the JWs teach was false, that I had to conform to be treated normally like your son. Show me where I’ve ever told you that you have to believe in God the same as I do to be treated like my father?
I especially like this point.
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Layla33Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

Beautiful letter.  One suggestion, break the paragraphs up a little more, underline and bold key points.  I think it will help. 

I wish you the very best.  I know it's hard. 

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Jringe01Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

I agree with Scotsman...send a postcard with just a simple I love you and hope all is well.

In the very beginning you say in part: "...any hope that you can come to your senses as far as this religion goes and we can renew our relationship..."

Right there where I bolded and underlined...you just lost him. Say that to any JW and it'll put them on the defensive and you know how they get when they feel they or their precious faith are under attack.

You have valid points but if you want to reach him you can't use them, not like this.

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Quirky1Re: Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

I agree with some of the things OTWO mentioned.  Of course I do not know the whole history here but I would not want to receive a letter like this from son no matter what my or his stand may be.   

I would not send it. It is pretty shattering.

Just my thoughts.

Quirky1  

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dawgRe: Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet
I thank you all for your suggestions, I've read all and really appreciate what you're all saying.

To onthewayout and Scottsman... I've tried many things and nothing works, this is the harshest letter I've sent to him yet. My letters to the family were much worse. Many of my letters have been answered, all of them without one question raised being answered. He won't speak to me period. Showing up with anything isn't going to stop the shunning. Come on guys look at what you're saying, don't you guys have family in the lie?
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dawgRe: Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet
Oh! You mean I have to lie? Thanks for the opinion, but I think I'll pass.
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chickpeaRe: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

what a tragedy that a "normal" parent/child relationship is made so difficult by those coniving wankers in their ivory tower.....

even if there is little hope for a reconcilliation, believe this.... your efforts prove you to be a good son and as was said, the better man.... cold comfort, but the facts speak volumes

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Quirky1Re: Re: Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

Dawg,

I don't understand because I've never been shunned even though it will happen one day if I'm Df'd and my in-laws are still Jdubs.  I cannot really understand the whole concept of shunning period especially your own flesh and blood.  To me it is a lot of BS and nothing more.

You can work on the more subtle things like some mentioned previously such as send a post card or a phone call, hope he answers and blurt a few words out.  I don't have the answers you are looking for but don't give up.  After all he is your father and that's all you are asking him to be.

I know it is indeed frustrating.  I went without speaking to my father for 25 years, not for religious reasons.  And another family member helped us to reconnect and we currently have a channell of communication even if it isn't as father and son as I would like it to be it is still comminication.

Dawg, I hope you the best in whatever decision you make!

Quirky1 

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Outaservice  Re: Long last letter to dad...please comment-not mailed yet

If the letter does get returned, just save it.  I predict in time he will want to read it, and then it will be available.

Outaservice 

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