I am stunned.
With all the effort to try and make the issue of abuse known through silentlambs. The hundreds of accounts given by victims explaining the foundation of why Watchtower policy hurts children. The lawsuits now being enacted to make Watchtower compensate those injured by their policy. Nine months into this war and it appears they are making it just that, a war. It is a war not about doing right by children, but instead it is a war of pride and arrogance with little remorse or compassion for the victims.
Why do I come to these conclusions? I just read the latest Awake on how to help battered women. They just do not get it and it appears they simply do not care.
Certain elements of the article are like a hard slap in the face of those who suffer abuse. If I could offer an opinion presented by the society it would be this, “If you are not beat to death, you better stick it out.”
A horrid abomination.
I am sure many JW’s will read the material and finding it wonderfully encouraging and offer it as the best thing written yet on the subject. Once again the issue becomes what is the actual remedy and what is not said. These two issues must be answered to understand what true policy is.
The first part relates to the actual remedy offered by the society, I offer a few examples:
1.Page eight offers this sentence: “Some battered women may need to seek assistance from the authorities. At times, a point of crisis-such as the intervention of the police-can cause an abusive man to see the seriousness of his actions. Admittedly however, any motivation to change often vanishes once the crisis has passed.” So what is being said here? Basically you can go the police but it will probably not do any good. Are sisters really being empowered here?
2.Page eleven offers the story of a woman who suffered abuse for twenty years. It describes how she had her teeth knocked out at one point, yet she did not leave or seek help. What was the way she solved the problem? By studying with JW’s and finally getting her husband to study. That's it, problem solved! What message does this send to any woman in an abusive household? If you leave you are not trusting in Jehovah. Take the beatings and maybe someday your husband will come around. What an example of comfort to a woman getting the crap beaten out of her….
3.Page 12 offer this counsel to wife beaters: “No husband who claims to be a follower of Christ can really say that he loves his wife if he abuses her. If he were to mistreat his wife, of what value would all his other works be? A “smiter” does not qualify for special privileges in the Christian congregation.” Did you get it? If you beat the crap out of your wife occasionally you can’t carry microphones at the meetings. They are really throwing the book at him aren’t they? What if he makes a habit of wife beating? The paragraph continues: “Indeed, any professed Christian who REPEATEDLY and UNREPENTANTLY gives in to fits of anger can be disfellowshipped from the Christian congregation.” So if you beat your wife on a regular basis and do not apologize, there is a chance you could get DF. Notice the wording “gives in”? I have never thought of beating a woman as a “giving” moment.
4.Page 12 continues with a further remedy: ”Can violent men change their behavior? Some have. Usually, however, a batterer will not change unless he (1) admits that his conduct is improper,” Excuse me? How many wife beaters will ever admit to anyone they hit their family much less they have a problem. Remember the “two witnesses” for child molestation? Sadly the same rules apply here.
The paragraph continues: “(2) wants to change his course, and (3) seeks help.” Again how many batterers will want to change enough to actually do anything about their behavior? Also it appears at this point we have a redeeming moment, a wife beater can exercise the option, “seeks help”. What will the society say is the way to seek help?
The paragraph continues: “Jehovah’s Witnesses have found that the bible can be a powerful influence for change. Many interested ones who study the Bible with them have developed a strong desire to please God. Concerning Jehovah God, these new bible students learn that “anyone loving violence His soul certainly hates.” Of course, for a batterer to change his behavior involves more than not hitting. It also entails learning a whole new attitude toward his wife.” So what is the remedy? Study with Jehovah’s Witnesses. No therapy, no medication, no outside assistance. Keep it all in house and let God solve the problem. If that does not solve it you need to “wait on Jehovah”. Do you see a similarity with molestation here? To confirm this policy the last paragraph finishes, ”The word of God is alive and exerts power. Thus, the wisdom contained in the Bible can help couples to analyze the problems they face and give them the courage to deal with them. More than that, the Bible contains the sure and comforting hope of seeing a world without violence when Jehovah’s heavenly King rules over all obedient mankind. The Bible says, “He will deliver the poor one crying for help, also the afflicted one and whoever has no helper. From oppression and from violence he will redeem their soul.” So thats it, the wife beater needs “courage” to deal with the problem and I guess the wife can have the wonderful hope of a resurrection if he kills her. It doesn’t get much more comforting than that.
The final point I would like to make is what is not said:
1.Not one word about seeking therapy or medication for an abuse situation.
2.Not one word telling the wife to leave a man who beats her and get therapy for herself.
3.Not one example of a woman who took control of the situation left the moron, protected her children and went on to a productive life.
4.Not one word on how children are battered, also when a wife is battered and the importance of getting them to a safe place.
5.Not one word on how to contact the police and the telephone numbers to call to get help.
What was not said describes Watchtower policy. It further helps anyone to see if you wish to beat women and children or have sex with children, how great the city of refuge is offered by the organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses.