Posts by dgp

35

A question about marriage in the organization

by dgp in

jw
friends

this post was motivated by another thread, namely.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/188552/1/onereason-for-a-gentleman-fader-to-stay-reasonably-associated.

this thread makes reference to the fact that a 40 something brother has a real chance with twenty-something and less sisters.

dgp

WTWizard, I would hate to be accused of having a bias against older men, being one myself. But, what if the older man were abusive, and decided to devote himself to preaching while his young wife works? I saw this happen.

I understand everyone's points and I do share the idea that age should not be that important, particularly compared to other personality traits. But, I have one question: of all the May to December marriages that you saw happen in the organization, how many, in your opinion, would have happened anyways if the girl in question had been free to marry outside?

9

Interesting Experience -Man falls in love with "Special Pioneer" sister who studied with him.

by Witness 007 in

when i pioneered we travelled to a small "outback" town every week...population 1,200, to assist 2 witness families with preaching.

a special pioneer sister {single not that great looking 40 year old} started a study with a tough hard working aussie bloke, but....rather then hand it over to me she continued to hold onto the study for afew months.

see outback australia is a bloody hot place during the summer so it's easier to spend the afternoon under a fan having a study rather then door knocking with a mile between houses!!!!

dgp

Well, I do get it: the sister who shouldn't have fallen for the man not only fell in love with him, but also, horror of horrors, slept with him before they were married. And I understand that we must interpret this in the frame of the WTS. Agreed.

However, what I meant to say is, this is nothing but the natural love between a woman and a man. Whatever the organization says against it is unnatural. Why should it be wrong for a JW to fall for a worldly?

60

"Youth book" said 97% of teenagers Masturbate...but none of them are Witnesses! Is this unrealistic?

by Witness 007 in

"youth" book and "young people ask" admitts that 97% boys and 92% of girls masturbate but of course none of the holy decent witness teenagers would ever do such a thing and earn jehovahs anger!

how realistic is this?

97% of the world have t.v's or a telephone!

dgp

From outside, it is easy to see this is an "I say, you say" situation. If Person B said "Nah, witnesses do masturbate", Witness person A would say "Prove it". I guess it's smarter, and closer to reality, to say that it is they who have the burden of proof. If they make the statement, let's not believe it unless they prove it.

I wonder how the statement could even be made. How was the printing department of the WTS to know?

Why would they bother to include references to masturbation if no one in the organization masturbated? When I was a kid, a witness at my door gave me the "Your Youth..." book, and I remember ver well that it had tips on how to avoid the temptation to masturbate. Where did they learn that from?

Not that this is a particularly important thing. I can't care less if brother or sister "I-don't-even-know-about" masturbate. It's their business. What is important about this is that it is an organizational lie, told in blatant hypocrisy. In a brief, they know this isn't so.

35

A question about marriage in the organization

by dgp in

jw
friends

this post was motivated by another thread, namely.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/188552/1/onereason-for-a-gentleman-fader-to-stay-reasonably-associated.

this thread makes reference to the fact that a 40 something brother has a real chance with twenty-something and less sisters.

dgp

Actually, I don't have a problem with an age gap, if two people really love each other. I think the main point is a lot of women, young and a bit older, settle for whatever they think is the best that they can get, because of there being a lack of normal single men in the org.

EmptyInside, you got this right. This is the problem.

I think individual maturity, shared values and compatible personalities are more important than a specific difference in age.

Yes, Leavingwt. I am left wondering how often this is the case between ANY 40 year old and ANY 19 year old.

35

A question about marriage in the organization

by dgp in

jw
friends

this post was motivated by another thread, namely.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/188552/1/onereason-for-a-gentleman-fader-to-stay-reasonably-associated.

this thread makes reference to the fact that a 40 something brother has a real chance with twenty-something and less sisters.

dgp

I'm sorry, but I would like to say that Sinis and All Time Jeff got the sense of this post wrong. It's not just about age between the parties to a marriage. It's about freedom, and about whether JW parents are to blame or not.

In the real world, if Brad Pritt truly loved a daughter of mine, I would have little say in whether she married him or not, unless she were a minor. My daughter would be free to marry essentially anyone, and she would have options. She wouldn't go for a 40-something man on the basis that he is but one of a few eligible mates. And, she could leave the man if he were no good. In a sense, this 40-something would need to prove himself a good mate or he would find himself all alone. Maybe my impression is wrong, but I don't think that's the case in the organization.

I'm not naïve, and I really know what world we live in, but I wouldn't want my daughter to marry someone just because he is handsome, rich, or a movie star. Or all three. I'm not a witness and certainly don't want to sound as one, but I don't think those are good criteria at all. Old-fashioned me doesn't want to think that marriage is a business. I'm afraid this is what happens in some of the marriages like the one I'm denouncing.

JeffT makes a good point. What is it that a 40 something has in common with a 20 year old? Not much, but she's young flesh. And sometimes he can have her because there aren't many others around. I hope I have made my point.

The other question is a very uncomfortable one. What is in the mind of a JW father who says nothing against his daughter marrying a man his age? How can he justify his own behavior? His saying that he's Brad Pitt would be as bad as saying that the man is spiritual and, gosh, he's so good at field service.

I have the feeling that this kind of thing is one of the many ways in which the organizations brings suffering to the lives of many.

9

Interesting Experience -Man falls in love with "Special Pioneer" sister who studied with him.

by Witness 007 in

when i pioneered we travelled to a small "outback" town every week...population 1,200, to assist 2 witness families with preaching.

a special pioneer sister {single not that great looking 40 year old} started a study with a tough hard working aussie bloke, but....rather then hand it over to me she continued to hold onto the study for afew months.

see outback australia is a bloody hot place during the summer so it's easier to spend the afternoon under a fan having a study rather then door knocking with a mile between houses!!!!

dgp

I'm missing out on something here, maybe because I'm not a witness. I suppose the special pioneer sister should have never fallen for the Hobart guy. However, from the perspective of the worldly male, why not? Weren't these sisters women?

6

Greenland discovery

by designs in

dna tests were performed on a human from the saqqaq tribe in greenland from 2500 years ago and suggest these siberians migrated some 5500 years ago to the region.

his gene sequencing tags him as siberian and linked to modern inuit but not to central and south american native tribes.. how do these discoveries reshape your views on human migration and the history of the human gene pool and those outlined in the bible.. ie active uninterrupted civilizations at the time of the biblical flood.. .

dgp

Nathan, I love that quote from Comedians :-) .

Now, this doesn't reshape a thing, but that's only because I'm not a witness.

Yknot, I read the same thing in a book whose title escapes me now. The Deluge as a regional thing. But, let's bear in mind that this is speculation. No evidence of a worldwide deluge has ever been found. Saying it was a local thing that got magnified takes us nowhere, really, because we don't know whether it was so. And, if it had been so, that is, a local flood, then our speculation would prove the Bible wrong. Nice circular thinking.

64

Did You Know A Lot Of "Very Intelligent" JWs?

by minimus in

jw
friends

in my lifetime of knowing jehovah's witnesses, i recognized very few as being extremely intelligent.

most seemed to just go along with the program.. i noticed we have a number of "very intelligent" exjws here..

dgp

Para, I won't tell you whether I have children because I don't want to give any personal information about myself.

Now, I do see your point: If you teach your children to question authority, they will question your own authority in a snap. And there will be no practical way to educate them. Well, let's say that I would love children, born to all parents, to reach the point where no authority is beyond questioning, not even mine. It would spare the world many a dictator, abuser, manipulator, illuminati and governing body member.

11

atheist: love how did it evolve and what is it?

by cyberjesus in

jw
friends

dgp

I don't know how love evolved, but I do know that I feel it as a sincere and self-denying wish for somebody else's happiness and fulfillment.

35

A question about marriage in the organization

by dgp in

jw
friends

this post was motivated by another thread, namely.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/188552/1/onereason-for-a-gentleman-fader-to-stay-reasonably-associated.

this thread makes reference to the fact that a 40 something brother has a real chance with twenty-something and less sisters.

dgp

I appreciate all the posts, and will appreciate others, if they come. As of this moment, I can conclude that a couple of forty-something witness parents might approve her daughter marrying a much older man for many reasons, but let's give the spiritual ones.

"This life, here and now, isn't important, really. Practical matters, such as bringing food to your table, are important for the time being only. Marriage is forever and ever. So, what we need is to cover the short term and the infinitely long term. For the short term, it's enough if he is spiritual and has the means to bring food to the table. That doesn't mean we want brother Oddball, but an older brother is way better than, Jehovah forbid, a wordlly man. Now, for the infinitely long term, brother 40-something will become young again in the new system, so age differences won't really matter".

I won't question the religious aspects of this. I just would like to mention what so many of you already know: that this marriage isn't about love, and that this way of arranging things results in enormous pain and many unhappy marriages. If I were a witness parent, my infinitely long term thinking would make me not approve of an older brother, unless he proved to be a very, very, very, very, very good and compatible person. I would give a damn about his being theocratic, sorry; I would take that for granted since he would be a witness.

And I tend to think that I would actually prefer my sister marrying a loving worldly man over an unloving brother. The worldly man would get to die soon and my daughter would get to have some happiness for the time being. An unloving brother, forever and ever.... NO WAY.

Thanks to all, and I look forward to more posts.