Brunhilda I can feel your loss and pain. I was a jw for more than thirty years. I hope you can understand her dilemma. Until she leaves either her marriage or the org. she will be torn and there is nothing you can do. If her husband hasn't attended in 2 years chances are he has said nothing to the cong. He may feel uneasy with his wife having a gay friend. I know because I am gay. I lost all of my family and friends when they found out. So give her space send her a card to her workplace once in a while to let her know you are still there for her and you never know what the future holds.
Peace Gary