OrphanCrow

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Posts by OrphanCrow

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  16

  Compliment or criticism - what affects you most?

  by EdenOne in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  a bit of introspection on this one ... just read on someone's post that a compliment makes him "float" for hours, and it got me thinking; within the spectrum of comments that people make about me, from compliment to criticism, which is the type that most affects me?.

  after my experience as a jehovah's witness, i find that i've become suspicious of compliments and over-sensitive to criticism.

  because a common technique of elders was to compliment someone before going down to business, that is, giving hard counseling or discipline.

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  OrphanCrow

  I never trust anyone who, upon initial meeting, gives me compliments. I have a little voice inside my head that responds, "But you don't know me well enough to compliment me." If they are too free in giving out compliments, big red flags go up because they want something from me.

  A compliment from someone who knows me...is sweet.

  Criticism comes in many forms - on one hand, it is a tool for bullies and abusers and on the other hand, it can be used as a bridge for better understanding of an issue, a skill or process, or a personal relationship.

  Unfortunately, it is most commonly used for the first purpose I stated. I don't respond well when someone uses criticism to belittle or abuse me.

  And what really gets my blood boiling is when I object to unfounded criticism and they respond with, "Oh..you sure don't take criticism well." Really ???? Well...no shit, Sherlock.
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  57

  Is it common for old men to marry young JW?

  by adjusted knowledge in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i left in the 90's and marriage partners were similar in age at my former congregation.

  i ran into a former jw friend from my childhood.

  i haven't seen him in 15 years.

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  OrphanCrow

  At what point becomes any age different a perversion, gross?

  When the older one is aware that the younger one is vulnerable because of inexperience and lack of knowledge, and subsequently exploits their position of power for their own satisfaction.
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  8

  child custody

  by zebulon in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is my first post.

  i have been an everyday reader of this site for well over three years.

  also jwfacts, jwstruggle, silentlambs, etc.

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  OrphanCrow

  ... and why the order was served.

  And that would be because....? (you don't have to answer...I know that is private)

  I don't know what the laws are in your country, but in mine, a restraining order is not easy to get. The one being served notice of restraint has to have committed an action that is potentially a criminal offense. That is how the orders are enforced - if you break the order, your ass is in jail on the offense that it was originally put in place for.

  Custody issues are notoriously volatile and, unfortunately, the child is often put in the middle of a conflict that has nothing to do with them.

  I wish you all the best in your efforts to maintain a relationship with your child. What is happening is not the child's fault and it would be a shame if your child suffered from the consequences of the conflict between you and your wife.

  Good luck.
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  34

  Old Witnessy Pics

  by snugglebunny in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so what have you got?.

  i'll start.. 1958 aboard steamship arosa star, english and german jw's bound for new york for 8 day assembly at yankee stadium.. .

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  OrphanCrow

  Wifi - your collection of images is tremendous!

  I was particularly drawn to the image of the two soldiers walking down the street and in the background, a group of JWs with their backs turned to them. That single photo evokes a fairly large political and social discourse.
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  200

  Scientific Proof that Evolution is NOT Scientific!

  by Nicola.threeangelsmessage in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  bruce malone, an outstanding scientist has absolute scientific proof that evolution is not scientific!.

  bruce, a leading researcher for dow chemical for 30 years; he is one of the top 100 inventors eighteen of his inventions raised millions of dollars; and has a b.s.

  degree in chemical engineering.

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  OrphanCrow

  
  
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  57

  Is it common for old men to marry young JW?

  by adjusted knowledge in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i left in the 90's and marriage partners were similar in age at my former congregation.

  i ran into a former jw friend from my childhood.

  i haven't seen him in 15 years.

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  OrphanCrow

  Sorry, prologos...I am not picking on you. And I don't want to de-rail this thread, but children do factor into relationships between older men and younger women.

  I want to point out that the disadvantages for children born of an elderly father has more than just social disadvantages. You said "If I ruled the world I would propose a law, that men can not have children before turning 65". Your statement disregards the environmental factors that preclude conception.

  http://www.macleans.ca/society/life/the-dangers-of-older-dads-2/
  

  It took an Icelandic study on paternal age, the largest and most definitive to date, published in Nature last year, to capture public attention. A team of researchers lead by respected neurologist Kári Stefánsson found fathers determined the rate of new, or “de novo,” genetic mutations leading to autism, schizophrenia, dyslexia and other conditions involving brain function. De novo mutations are not harmful in themselves; but only one change in a key gene is required to cause some types of disease—the more mutations, the higher the risk. The study found “de novo” gene mutations double every 16.5 years: the baby of a 36-year-old father would, in theory, have twice as many new mutations than one whose father is 20, whose sperm carries about 25 mutations (though it doesn’t mean his child would automatically have twice as many problems; it depends where the mutuations occur). The study concluded the rate of increase in de novo mutations could be ascribed to the father’s age—97.1 per cent or “maybe entirely”—a totally unexpected result, Stefánsson told Maclean’s. “That is amazing, in itself.”

  
  
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  57

  Is it common for old men to marry young JW?

  by adjusted knowledge in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i left in the 90's and marriage partners were similar in age at my former congregation.

  i ran into a former jw friend from my childhood.

  i haven't seen him in 15 years.

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  OrphanCrow

  OC, The loss is not for the children.

  Prologos, I understand what you are saying about having more time for children when you are older. That is true. Most men over 65 are holding grandchildren on their knee and sharing stories with them - that is a grandfather's role - not a father's.

  A child of an elderly parent misses out on the critical role modeling that a younger father can give them. If a father is already retired when their child is born, that child has no exposure to how a male functions in their formative adult years. The child, instead, is taught how to behave in their declining years.

  I know men who had elderly fathers - they describe the embarrassment of having their father show up at school and everyone thinking that it was their grandpa. And they describe the disappointment of having a father that was not able to engage in the activities that other children had with their fathers. Other children could engage in activities like 'take your kid to work' days. Simple things like throwing a baseball and learning how to ride a bike were not activities that their elderly fathers were capable of doing with them.

  Now, I understand that there are older men with high energy levels...but...not many could run the bases around a baseball diamond and still be able to turn their turn at bat.
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  200

  Scientific Proof that Evolution is NOT Scientific!

  by Nicola.threeangelsmessage in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  bruce malone, an outstanding scientist has absolute scientific proof that evolution is not scientific!.

  bruce, a leading researcher for dow chemical for 30 years; he is one of the top 100 inventors eighteen of his inventions raised millions of dollars; and has a b.s.

  degree in chemical engineering.

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  OrphanCrow

  Nicola: some people think they can come and abuse Christians because won't/cant fight back. Well they're in for a BIG shock - watch this space!

  Sweet! Does this mean that you will respond to this? or am I wasting space by asking you to respond?

  Nicola, language has so much meaning that is 'loaded' and it would help if you could share your understanding of what some of the terms that you use mean to you.
  You seem like somebody who takes their research seriously, so, please, define these terms, if you have the time and don't mind doing so:
  1. scientist
  2. scientific method
  3. scientific evidence
  4. scientific proof
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  57

  Is it common for old men to marry young JW?

  by adjusted knowledge in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i left in the 90's and marriage partners were similar in age at my former congregation.

  i ran into a former jw friend from my childhood.

  i haven't seen him in 15 years.

  1. 
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  OrphanCrow

  Prologos, you do have a point. There are many cultures in which the practice of young women marrying older men is quite common. The older man satisfies those young women's need for security.

  However, where this becomes problematic is that the union may benefit the two who married - the older man gets a nursemaid in his declining years and the young woman gets security far faster than if she married a younger man who still has to accumulate his wealth. - but the ones who pay the price are the children born from that union.

  I have met a few people who had an elderly father. Their fathers were elderly - over 50 and more - when they were born. These children often miss out on what other children have - a father who engages in sport and play with them, and quite often, that elderly father is already long gone when it is time for them to mark their rites of passage.

  Not only that, but grandchildren never get to benefit from the wisdom of the grandfather - he is long gone before they are born.

  December-May relationships work well for the two who decide to hook up - but not so well for the children.
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  34

  Old Witnessy Pics

  by snugglebunny in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so what have you got?.

  i'll start.. 1958 aboard steamship arosa star, english and german jw's bound for new york for 8 day assembly at yankee stadium.. .

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  OrphanCrow

  snugglebunny: So what have you got?

  Old photos are great, snugglebunny. These photos are from my family collection as well.

  
  A JW conscientious objector at a work camp in British Columbia, Canada, during WW2 (he is showing what they got for lunch - two slices of bread with a wee dab of jam in the middle):

  
  

  Sandwich board advertising in rural Canada post WW2:

  
  
  

  
  

  How field service was done in rural Canada post WW2: