What stages of Healing/Recovery have you or are you going through?

by diamondblue1974 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • Legolas
    Legolas

    When I figure that out, I'll let ya know!

  • SamIam1976
    SamIam1976

    I have now reached 11 years out of the Borg. I have two beautiful children, boy 4 years old and a girl 1 1/2 years. I have a wonderful husband who I have been with since 1997 and I can now say without regret I no longer consider myself a Jehovah's Witness.

    It has taken me 11 years to be able to say this with complete conviction and out loud even to "mixed company" but I have made it to this point in my life where I completely refuse this cult to control any aspect of my life any longer. My parents have no guilt factor over me either. I have made it out alive and I want others to know that you can make out alive too. Life goes on you just have to have the courage to go out there and live it the best way you know how.

    Sherry

  • vitty
    vitty

    Difficult to say.....if my adult daughter was out, I wouldnt worry about the rest of my family...........thats a lie I would but i wouldnt feel so frantic sometimes. I want to tell everyone im no part of this madness, but keep my mouth shut because of the hurt it would cause my daughter.

    So Im stuck, in no mans land I know the truth, but cant escape fully, not just yet.

    Its so bad,

  • tfsm
    tfsm

    I would be hard-pressed to label specific stages. I would say for the first couple of years I was mostly confused, followed by a couple of years of anger, followed by a couple years of shame and depression. After that, I don't know. It has been fifteen years since I left and until very recently I haven't been able to talk about it.

  • knot4me
    knot4me

    I left 6 years ago for the way I was treated. I had nothing to do with religion or God up until the past few months. I kinda always suspected,( but wanted to belive) there was something off about the whole thing. Now I am just starting my journey to find out the real truth about the borg and in the process, I hope to find a new belief system. I can say for sure that I will never go into something so blindly again and I will never believe something just because someone of "authority" says its true. As far as healing goes, I think I'm somewhere in the middle of the process. Like many others, careerwise I will be playing catch up for a while. In the next year I plan to start taking some class and eventually become a nurse. I try not to have regrets, as I believe everything happens for a reason and there are always lessons to be learned if you are willing to try.

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow

    I'm at the, "Oh crap, I have to work a sales job because I didn't finish my education. And will continue to work a sales job if'n I don't get my butt back in school" stage and I'm rather sick of my sis, her family and my brother shunning me, but if they want to be slaves of men then well, I'm not going to waste a lot of time thinking about them.

  • Soledad
    Soledad

    I'm at this "so this is how the real world works" phase.

    After so many years spent in such an insular and provincial environment it's hard to overcome certain fears and apprehension.

  • tfsm
    tfsm

    FlyingHighNow: Go back to school! It's almost never too late. I went back and it was the best thing I ever did. Changed my life 100% for the better.

  • Darth Yhwh
    Darth Yhwh

    When I began leaving the WTBS, I was more concerned about living the life the way I wanted. I discovered the abandonment of the 1914 doctrine during this time but I had pretty much made up my mind at that time that the WTBS didn’t affect my life any more. I had always had doubts and in the time that I had been away from the borg I had made up my mind that they were not the truth as they promote.

    It wasn’t until years after I had been away that I started to look into the reality of what the WTBS claims as truth. When I discovered all of the lies and deceit I became angry at the fact that my first 17 to 18 years of life had been so controlled. The more I thought about it the more enraged I became. All the persecution endured, hours spent at meetings, hours spent studying for meeting, all the nervous hours spent preaching to strangers on their door steps were utterly wasted.

    I’m still trying to deal with this obviously. I believe that’s why I come here to this board. I need to vent the frustration some how. So I suppose that the state that I’m currently in is one of anger and frustration.

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow: Go back to school! It's almost never too late. I went back and it was the best thing I ever did. Changed my life 100% for the better.

    Thank you for the encouragement. What did you take in school? Did you get the job you hoped you would?

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