I'm a bit conflicted. A few years back, as a jw, I studied with a wonderful family from China. They moved away and I transferred over the study to a jw couple in their new area. They've continued to study (a total of almost 3 years now). They attend meetings. I saw them at the 2004 District Convention and have spoken to them by phone a few times this year.
Here's the dilemna. They're not yet baptized. I don't even think they're publishers yet. The last time I heard from them was just before this past summer's DC asking me if I could meet them there to say hello. I didn't return the call as I didn't attend and was in the process of leaving the org. I notice on my phone's call display that they've called a few times since, the last call being about 2 weeks ago. I would guess they don't know I've disassociated. They haven't left any more messages though. I just don't know what to do.
What are my moral obligations here? I feel bad because I'm the one who initally studied with them and although I was in the org at the time, my views have now changed. It's almost like they're my children in a way and I want to tell them that "Mommy" made a grave error and they should run for their lives! Yet I also realize they're not kids. They're adults entitled to make their own decision.
What would you do?
tp
Anti-Witness to former Bible study?
by tall penguin 8 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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tall penguin
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JH
If you don't do anything you'll feel bad, so phone them !
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jgnat
I'd just plant a seed. Like, ask them if they are completely happy with their studies or if they have any nagging questions.
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anewme
I would definitely call them. They seem like real sincere people. And they may have their doubts and trust you with their feelings. You are the one to help them.
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skyman
I have the same dilamma. I started a study with a man and his wife. He was a do not call but for some reason he would allow me to call on him so over years of calling on him I finally started a study with him. I was only going through the motions at that time, so I told them I was to busy to study with them any more. So I asked an Elder and his wife to study with them. Since then, the mans wife has died but he is now going to all the meetings and will soon be baptized. He has talked to me many times. I will not tell him why I have quit going. I can not tell him. He now has the hope of seeing his wife in the new order and he hangs on to this hope so strong it makes me feel good for him that he has this hope. I simply can't bring myself to do it and hurt him.
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tall penguin
Thanks for the responses. This is tough for me. I know though, deep down, that I need to muster up the courage to call them. I'll do that this week. Pray for me, send me positive vibes or just hold the space for me while I do this difficult thing. I appreciate it.
Skyman...wow, that's a tough situation. It's tough when there are so many emotions on line. I think about how in the org we were encouraged to seek out those with a change of life situation (job loss, death of a family member, new to the country) to offer them "hope." I always felt a twinge of guilt around this as I felt like I was taking advantage of people who were in transition. From what I've seen over the years, many jw's started studying during one of these transition times. I wonder how many were vulnerable to the org's offerings and made their decisions to become witnesses from that place of vulnerability rather than a place of strength. It saddens me.
tp
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skyman
All Cults do this. When the people are down that when the hope for something better is the hardest to ignore if it come in the form of fellowship from the BORG that the person is not getting elsewhere then he or she is hocked.
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Sheri
I was also had a bible study going when I came accross information that I could not accept as a JW. I did further research and came to the conclusion that this is not the sole channel of God but people like other religions doing what they think is right and truth. I explained to my bible study what had been discovered and that I could not accept the sole channel and that all would die except JW's at Armageddon. Of course when put that why she said she did not believe God would do that either, since we had not covered anything to say that exactly, we only learn those things after we are "in" and attending all the meetings. I told her I was on a journey to check all that I had been taught.
I was truthful in explaining that this would be considered by some as if I was trying to block her progress in the truth, but she said that she was not willing to study with others and would I be willing to share with her what I was reaffirming. When my old book study conductor called for my hours I told him that I was not studying with her any longer. He is fully aware of my questions & issues, but has also chose to not follow up with me on anything, thereby, I am just fading, which is fine at this time.
I did help bring another person in to the truth and I feel regrets about that and I am sure one day we will run into eachother, but I will be truthful and at the same time make known that this is not about my relationship with God its about my relationship with an organization.
So dont be afraid to talk with them, they may be seeking you out for a reason, who knows the angels may be directing them to you. Just go in love and peace.
Sheri
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fairchild
Often, when "studies" have questions, they like to see them answered by someone they are studying with, or by someone they have studied with in the past. What if they have doubts, and they are trying to talk to you about this? I'd definitely call, who knows where the conversation will lead..