Met my first Elder after diassociation

by aud8 18 Replies latest jw experiences

  • aud8
    aud8

    Well I met my first witness (and it would have to be an elder who I always got on well with) last night after my disassociation 3 weeks ago and I was not prepared for how hard it felt. I had the most human reaction of recognising someone I knew and had to stop myself saying hi. He just rushed past me. I had the horrible feeling that I was some sort of lowlife. I felt so horrible and angry and guilty afterwards, it annoyed me that he was so self righteous. Even though I knew this would happen I was so not prepared for my own reaction. I suppose I thought that they wouldn't really NOT talk to me. Anyone else had similar experiences?

  • BoozeRunner
    BoozeRunner

    Hi Aud, sorry you have to go thru this crap. I know the feelings well. After I was DF'd, I was brokering some promotional items for a friends family reunion. The graphic designer I was using was unable to complete the artwork for me, so I called a brother who owned his own Graphic Design business. He refused to do business with me. It really sickened me at the time.
    But now I realize that such people are embedded in the JW cult mindset. They are just following orders for fear of their lives-at least thats what they are told.
    Theres a whole world out there waiting for you to discover it, and you can come to this board for encouragement.

    Boozy

  • individuals wife
    individuals wife

    aud8 - Boy, do I know what you mean there....

    I remember the first time I was shunned, a couple of days after I da'd, I saw my 'best friend' in the street and as she went by I smiled, planning to say hi if she smiled back. Well, talk about an icy glare, she stared right at me then right through me, it really shocked me and was very disconcerting. I went home and as I shut my front door behind me I was physically shaking, so upset was I. I was not prepared for the feelings of rejection. I felt almost giddy with all the emotions that were going through me, I was unprepared for this. I cannot abide conditional love.

    Later as I had time to reflect I just found myself getting incredibly angry, how dare she treat me this way when we had been so close and I had been such a help to her when she faced difficulties. How dare she shun me when I had put myself on the line for her, she was associating with her mother who had da'd and I carried on speaking to her mother, I could have got into a lot of hot water over that yet I stuck by her, over and above the directions of the WTS.

    Now shunning is a daily event for me, I have many JWs living in my area and I am out and about a lot so inevitably I see a quite a number of them, especially the mothers at the school gates. I no longer find it difficult, in fact, I have come to find it very amusing, the lengths that some of them go to to avoid meeting you in the street, what interesting things they spot in shop windows, the effort they take in rushing past looking as though they are on important business. Very sad.

    I like to feel now as though I am the one shunning THEM! Puts a whole new perspective on it!!

  • kes152
    kes152

    Hello Aud8,

    I'm really sorry that you experienced that. They are "true Pharisees." I noticed before you were 'looking' for the Christ ... the real "truth" from heaven. Is this still true with you? I have lost much in the 'organization,' but I have gained MUCH in Christ. I now finally understand him, and what he's been trying to get us to understand for such a long time. The reason we don't "get it" is because for some reason we didn't want to "get it."

    Holy spirit is truly a wonderful gift and it 'heals' us. It also speaks to us so that we don't get misled again like we did with the WTBTS. If you still want to "converse" .... i look forward to your posts.

    Peace!
    Aaron

  • Francois
    Francois

    And all this that you folks describe is coming from an organization that represents God. You know, God. The one about which Paul says "God is Love."

    The JWs still worship the God of Horeb, the mightly thunderer, judge-accountant whom they cannot comport with the God of Love, the Father that Jesus revealed. And so they invented this God that has Multiple Personality Disorder. Now he's a God of Love; now he's gonna kill off most of the human race; now he's full of compassion; now he's gonna get you if you're the offspring of a bastard to the umpteenth generation; now he's forgiving. He's like snow: you never know what you're gonna get, you just know it's gonna be something.

    Crazy gods make for crazy people, and the JWs are just like the god they worship. Crazy. Schizophrenic. They're dangerous, ultimately. Stay away from 'em. They're bad for you.

    Francois

  • Kat_
    Kat_

    aud:

    So sorry that you had to experience that. I also am sorry for the others here who went through it. It's so sad; the whole thought of it.

    Kat

    PS: You were most definitely NOT the lowlife in this scenario.

  • BERNARD
    BERNARD

    my mother in law one day comes to my house under my own roof and don't speak, she calls for her daughter and don't speak but just ask for her daugter, one time she came to the house looking for her phony ass jw daughter which she was not home, I tried to tell her and she ignored me like she was Jehovah Himself. She fortunate she only my mother in law i would tell her, to kiss my ass.I disassociated myself also just to get away from my jw mother in law so she will not speak to me and come over my house with her tired truth. lol

    THE REAL TRUTH STANDS THE TEST OF TIME, IT WILL NOT CHANGE, IF IT DOES ITS A LIE.The sun will rise, The sun will set,AN EXAMPLE of The real TRUTH nobody can change.

  • JUSTAMOM
    JUSTAMOM

    Hello aud8 and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

    I read some of your experience lately and LEAVING was the best thing you did.
    Somewhere in your heart you were asking, "is this the truth?".....
    we don't always HEAR what he tells us at LEAST at first. If you are like me, you were raised around the org and told there IS NOTHING ELSE!!!

    Being out here ALL alone. What a nightmare (at least they think)
    Your lord and father Jah have freed you from bondage to slavery under mans yoke. GALATIANS 5:1.
    We were as GALATIANS chapter 4 describes while inside.

    NOW where do you go???
    That is not how Peter worded it in John 6:68
    It was "WHOM shall we go away to?" It was Christ that they knew was THE TRUTH. John 14:6 pleas read it!

    It is not a where or a what but a WHOM!!!
    This organization has fulfilled what our master decribes in JOHN chapter 10.
    But remember...Christ sheep know HIS voice and listen to IT and HE LEADS THEM! Not man PSLAMS 146:3,4 (Do not put your trust in them)

    Coming to our father through his son is what he wants us to do. That is how we 'walk by faith' 'worship in spirit and truth' and 'keep our eyes on what is unseen'...

    Yes it takes faith. That is why our lord said it was NOT the possession of ALL people.

    In the org. EVERYTHING was based on SIGHT. "LOOK AT US!" Jehovah MUST be blessing us...
    Take away what Jah is NOT concerned with (sight, strength, and numbers) and what do they have?
    Folks living THEIRS LAWS that are written in the WT and other PUBS. Then just when you got that teaching and "NEW light" down,,,they change it again again and again..

    Poor indecisive Jah

    NO!!!Poor indecisive man that is NOT SPIRIT DIRECTED!

    Please read in your free time JOHN 6:48-59 and see what the holy spirit is saying is open to ALL.
    Something we were denied inside as part of the great crowd.
    But even though all of Israel did not consist of priests...
    ALL of Israel were allowed in that covenant as HIS people. To belong to the Christ. To be led by spirit.

    Hope this helps

    May you have our fathers blessings upon you at this time especially

    JUST A MOM (Kim)

    p.s as far as when armaggedon??
    AMOS 5:18-25
    who craves that day more than anyone on earth???
    even so-called christendom at least is longing for the second coming of Christ to take those that belong to him.

    REVELATION 16:14 (notice..the war)
    REVELATION 20:7,8 (notice..the war)

  • jurs
    jurs

    Hi Aud8,

    I'm sorry to hear your about your experience, and too think I use to believe shunning was a loving provision!!
    I DA'd myself the end of may and ran into a sister last week for the first time. She walked away from me and was trying her best to avoid me. I felt sad. Hope it helps to know that we understand what your going through.
    jurs

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    G'day guys and gals,

    It certainly is the 'dark side' of the borg, isn't it? They may not realise it, but JWs are actually taught to hate. Oh yes, they're taught to love, but only to the extent that the controllers dictate. It's hatred for anyone else.

    Notice how many times in the publicationms hatred is mentioned. Fascinating? Well, it would be if it wasn't so tragic.

    As Francois points out, they still worship the God of Horeb.

    Cheers,
    Ozzie

    "You can know the law by heart, without knowing the heart of it"
    Philip Yancey, What's So Amazing About Grace?

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